JackoOnHisBacko

I am a completely average looking dude. I'm in pretty good shape, but I have a big nose, receding hairline, and skinnier legs than I want.

It doesn't happen to me nearly often enough (~6 times in my ~30 years post-puberty), but occasionally women will "come on to me" in a purely sexual way.

I have been asked by a woman to send them a dick pic.
I have had a women grope me in public (at a pool hall, with other people watching, over my pants)
I have been asked by a woman, in my bedroom, if she could watch me jerk off, and she then told me how hot she thought it was.

I would not do any of these things without the woman requesting it of me.

I will continue to not send dick pics, and not jerk off in front of women unless they request it.

But, if I took the victim point of view...
The woman who asked me for a dick pic? I guess I can claim she sexually harassed me.
The woman who groped me in the pool hall? I guess I can claim she sexually harassed me.
The woman in my bedroom who asked to watch me jerk off? I guess I can write that one off, since she was also naked at the time.

But if I'm ugly enough, and a woman is pretty enough, and I say "You look very nice today", at some point, simple verbal compliments and flirting should not be seen as sexual harassment.

Troy Stiffler

Time to take the Phillie Phanatic to the glue factory.

whotony

Blue Jays fired Greg Zaun from their Sportsnet channel

DaveyJoe

There's an older woman at work who makes inappropriate comments to me from time to time. If I was attracted to her, I'd shrug it off, laugh, or enjoy it, but I'm not, and sometimes it makes me uncomfortable. Is that fair? Perhaps not. I haven't complained because it's not worth the trouble, but ultimately I'm there to work, and I wish she wouldn't say those things to me.

DJariya

Looks like Lauer deleted all his social media accounts.

His lawyer probably told him to do so or he must have gotten a shit ton of hate posts and tweets.

Kathryn3

This happens actually in this industry, casting couch is common. I forgot the movie name it was a viral news last year, where they revealed a small actress was raped in reality while shooting a rape scene.
I seen that movie on 123netflix.pro but don't remember the name

d2cheer

See that is the thing when is it OK for comedy???

Cardsfan111

I hadn't posted regarding all the recent news and now see there's 2 ongoing sexual harassment threads. I shared this in the other. Maybe it belongs here.

The Barna group just did a recent survey on what folks consider sexual harassment.

It shows how messed up society is. 9% of women and 17% of men don't see "being forced to do something sexual" as harassment. Even more disturbing: 11% of women & 24% of the men polled wouldn't characterize flashing/exposing yourself to another as falling into that category.

Mabuse

Hello Russian Bot,

I think the movie you are referring to is Last Tango In Paris. No bot-ie’s perfect.

Regards,
Mabuse

Nick Danger

What if you're flashing a Buddhist temple?

Norm de Plume

Then they might be forced to exile more Rohingyas.

TheMovieman

Geoffrey Rush Steps Aside as President of Australian Academy After Misconduct Accusation

https://www.thewrap.com/geoffrey-rus...ct-accusation/

Norm de Plume

You're lucky. I'm a decent-looking guy around your age, and I dress well, if conservatively and stodgily, uncoolly, on the rare occasion I go out. I have never been approached by a woman, ever. A big part of it is that I'm a recluse who avoids social situations, of course, but I must also project a certain unsmiling, taciturn despondency that women understandably don't find appealing.

Groucho

This one seem odd to me. There's no indication of what the "inappropriate" conduct was, or even if it was sexual in nature. How can he possibly defend himself?

Brian T

Actresses Detail Groping, Simulated Rape in Audition for Ashley Judd Sex-Trafficking Film:

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/ne...g-film-1063731

Draven

Every improv class or group I've ever been with discusses the level of physical interaction the group is comfortable with. You never just "go for it". That's Improv 101 stuff.

wishbone

Draven

God that scene is so great.

DthRdrX

Unclejosh

Waiting for Malek's #metoo story...

Brian T

But wait . . .

Bryan Singer Accuses Fox of Refusing to Let Him Care for Sick Parent
http://variety.com/2017/film/news/br...ng-1202630586/

ntnon

Yet another hard-to-define line (and, apparently, concept) that can dangerously loop back to being "in the eye of the beholder" - on the 'lesser' end of words, comments, flirting, etc.

I think everybody could agree that rape is A Bad Thing, but anything less is going to fall on a sliding scale of context and (implied/explicit) consent. And given that almost every situation will be two people with different versions of the same story, attempting to judge - especially in retrospect - is troublingly problematic.

What concerns me even more is that so many different situations and DEGREES are being directly or implicitly equated. It's similar to McCarthyism and more recently the UK's Jimmy Saville fallout. There is a fundamental difference between Person A (allegedly) raping a dozen women and Person B thinking they were - or even "actually" - flirting with a potentially interested party...

And that's without even continuing a quid pro quo debate.

ntnon

Does that - hardly unique - anecdote say something about changing attitudes, normalized predatory behavior, or controversially suggest that sometimes (or for some people, or in some situations) the same behavior can be 'acceptable'..?

ntnon

Quite.

But the crudeness and offensive are often subjective...

Personal anecdote: female colleague tells female colleague her clothes looks nice - just a comment, and fine. Male colleague tells same colleague her clothes look nice - just a comment, and fine. Another male colleague says the same - flirting, and appreciated. A third does, and it's "creepy" and he gets officially warned by management..

All four used essentially (almost exactly) the same words. To the same person, on the same day, and (not that it matters) they were correct. But... one was "harassment," and three were not.

ntnon

Bear in mind that the workplace (or college) is many people's primary place of interaction. You spend time with people, get to know them, get to like them... it's a much 'better' method of meeting people than meeting total strangers, surely?

And while there are clear definitions, there are hazier interpretations and lines. Appearances and feelings are important - and necessarily subjective. People where I work chat, flirt, joke, spend time together outside of work and generally Make Friends with each other. And, on occasion, form relationships, impregnate one another and report some people for harrassing them. In at least one case, all three in that order.....