Comic Book Guy - "Worst episode ever!"

So many to chose from....

Homer: Ooh! A plan fiendishly clever in its in-trick-asies.
Bart: Take him away, boys.
Wiggum: Hey, I'm the chief here! Bake him away, toys.
Lou: What'd you say, Chief?
Wiggum: Do what the kid says.


Homer: I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless, evil stuff. And I want in.
Same ep.
Homer: What do they do? What don't they do!? (laughs) Oh, they do so many things... they never stop... oh, the things they do there! My stars.
Lisa: You don't know what they do there, do you?
Homer: Not as such, no.


Homer: Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.

Women will like what I tell them to like. - Homer

Why do they call 'em fingers if they don't fing? Oh wait, there they go. - Otto

This tastes like grandma!
You're right, it does taste like grandma. - Ralph and Chief Wiggam

I'm not sure why, exactly, but it always makes me laugh when Marge says, "She's such a butthole".

see my sig...

FBI Agent: "I've seen hundreds of people write to their favourite actors, but this guy writes to films!"

The letter is as follows:
"Dear Die Hard, You rock! Especially that bit where the guy was on the roof. PS: do you know Mad Max?"

Marge, we need more chocolate-vanilla-strawberry ice cream!

Homer: Does it have a satellite dish?
RV Salesman: My friend, it has it's own satellite.

Bart: Thank goodness we came to our senses and worship a carpenter who's been dead for 2000 years!

Mayor: Today we pass the torch of Plow people. (Homer) Give me the key.

Mayor: There are teeth marks here.

Homer: I thought there was chocolate...... then why was it wrapped in foil?

Mayor: It was never wrapped in foil!

Homer - "I love these lazy sunday afternoons"
Marge - "Homer, its Tuesday"
Homer - " D'OH"

Too many to name just one.

Marge: Wow Sting you should take a break.

Sting: Not when one of my fans needs me...

Marge: I dont think he has one of your records....

Homer: Shut up Marge... he is a good digger.

Sea Captain - "Arrgh, I'm not attractive."

Leonard Nimoy: "The following tale of alien encounters is true and by true I mean false. They're all lies, but they're entertaining lies and in the end isn't that the real truth? The answer...is no."

Chief Wiggum: "You've got the wrong number...this is 91..2.

Professor Frink, Professor Frink, he'll make you laugh, he'll make you think, he likes to run, and then the thing with the... person. Oh boy. That monkey is going to pay.

[Homer, rolling his eyes] "Oh, come on Lisa - `Bart's a vampire`, `beer kills brain cells`. Riiiiight. Now let's go back to that....box thingy, where our....beds and TV is...."

Its "Oh Lisa, you and your stories. 'Bart is a Vampire', 'Beer kills brain cells.' Now lets go back to that... building... thingy, where beds and TV... is".


How about "Ooh, he card reads good".

Mr Burns: " Ah fresh victims for my evergrowning army of the UNDEAD"
Smithers: "Sir you forgot to let go of the Button"
Mr Burns: "ah well SonofaBi..."


Lisa: "Dad you have to kill the head vampire Mr Burns!!"
Homer: "Kill my boss??? Dare i live out the American Dream?"

Flanders: Hey homer can i eat your ear?

Homer: (shoots flanders with a shotgun)

Bart: Wow you killed the Zombie Flanders.

Homer: He was a zombie?

- see marge, I told you they could deep fry my shirt
- I didn't say "they couldn't," I said "you shouldn't"

Mr. Skinner: "You did it, Nibbles! Now...chew through my 'Ballsack.'"

I love when Ned says:

WHAT THE FLOOD?

What episode is this from?

The way it is delivered is so friggin hilarious!

nevermind found it:

Mom and Pop Art

Ewwwww! I'll take the crab juice.

So I says to Mabel, I says...

I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree!
I disagree with that.
So do I!

I will name him Hoju.

Jeremy's Iron?
Here's a ball. Perhaps you'd like to bounce it?

Girls, Lisa! Boys kiss girls!