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Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

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Old 01-04-13 | 02:36 PM
  #176  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

What were they thinking with this script? *face palm*

Movies like this make me wonder what is wrong with me. I could've gone to see Les Misérables, but instead off I go to a ridiculous horror sequel. Sad thing is, if given the choice again, I would probably do the same thing. I have no horror movie sense.

Originally Posted by Why So Blu?
Texas Chainsaw 3D is not just a bad film, it is an idiotic one that literally cannot do basic math. Read on to find out why.
OMG yes! I thought my head was going to explode over that. I am not usually one to nitpick a movie either but C'MON MAN!
Old 01-04-13 | 03:19 PM
  #177  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I figured this probably wouldn't turn out well but all the negative reviews are really making me second guess if I want to bother with seeing this in theaters or just wait until it hits Blu-ray.
Old 01-04-13 | 03:30 PM
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by Mike86
I figured this probably wouldn't turn out well but all the negative reviews are really making me second guess if I want to bother with seeing this in theaters or just wait until it hits Blu-ray.
Wait until it hits you in the head with a flying chainsaw.
Old 01-04-13 | 04:06 PM
  #179  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I kind of liked the remake. It has some nasty stuff in it.

Too many good movies out right now to watch this. Still haven't gotten around to seeing The Hobbit!

And I'm so tired of the "new years" commercial. Ugh. It plays everywhere. Something about the sound just annoys the hell out of me.
Old 01-04-13 | 05:05 PM
  #180  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I'm a little disappointed that this film was never fun.

Outside of Alexandra Daddario's hotness and some solid gore by Nicotero & Berger, there isn't much here.

It was mentioned earlier, but I think making this a direct sequel to the '74 film was a mistake. Even then, many of the 'returning' cast show up in the first 10 minutes of the film. They also look uninspired/bored.

Also why make a big deal about making this sequel to the '74 film, if you are just going to fall back into (bad) genre habits and very familiar Texas Chainsaw ground/plotlines?

Luckily for me, two folks couldn't stop talking during the film, so the theater manager gave me a free pass.
Old 01-04-13 | 05:16 PM
  #181  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I feel like I should have gotten a free pass for wasting my free pass on this horseshit. The more I think about it after having seeing it last night leaves an even more disgusting taste in my mouth. What's worse is that supposedly Tobe Hooper has said that he likes it and that it goes well with his original. I hope he was either joking or just saying it knowing that he will profit off this movie.
Old 01-04-13 | 07:34 PM
  #182  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I absolutely LOVED it (seriously) Never seen a TCM film before. When I saw The Collection I was like cool, dismemberment, but something about how the deaths were done in this movie elicited a visceral reaction of disgust other than "ooooh, awesome death." I can't remember the last time a movie did that. I actually enjoyed the movie experience a lot. Saw it in 3D.
Old 01-04-13 | 08:33 PM
  #183  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

If it were a standalone movie and there not being an existent Chainsaw franchise before it then I can see it as a passable horror movie. However, that is not the case here and the movie completely comes off its wheels with dumb ass characters, over-used cliches and really poorly written dialogue. "Do your thing cuz!" and saying "Welcome to Texas!" to someone who is already from Texas are about the stupidest pieces of shit dialogue that I have heard in a long time from a movie that I watched at a theater.
Old 01-04-13 | 08:36 PM
  #184  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I do have to admit I had to fight an enormous urge to scream at the top of my lungs "YOU (#*@&*$( IDIOTS!!!!!!!" during the
Spoiler:
jeep escape scene
Old 01-04-13 | 08:41 PM
  #185  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

There were multiple times I wanted to scream and even a few times that I did say things aloud and most of the crowd agreed with me. Many of the people walked out of that movie very disappointed. I didn't hear one single person say that it was awesome and there were over 50 people at the screening I attended last night.
Old 01-04-13 | 08:53 PM
  #186  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by dsa_shea
If it were a standalone movie and there not being an existent Chainsaw franchise before it then I can see it as a passable horror movie. However, that is not the case here and the movie completely comes off its wheels with dumb ass characters, over-used cliches and really poorly written dialogue. "Do your thing cuz!" and saying "Welcome to Texas!" to someone who is already from Texas are about the stupidest pieces of shit dialogue that I have heard in a long time from a movie that I watched at a theater.
The idea of
Spoiler:
a long lost Sawyer
is actually an interesting one. The film's execution just fails at making it interesting.
Old 01-04-13 | 09:18 PM
  #187  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

1. When does this movie take place? Besides the first one took place in '74, which would put Heather in her mid to late 30's. Why is she 20 something here? Did any of the tombstones have dates on them? They showed an iPhone with Facetime so I'm assuming this is present day?

2. Exactly why should we pity Leatherface & his family after what they did in the original? This was a face turn not even Vince McMahon would approve.

3. Despite Leatherface murdering all of Heather's friends, and even Heather herself, she not only agrees to move into the house but now also looks after Leatherface? I know they only showed her boyfriend and roommate cheating behind her back as a lazy attempt to not make us care about their deaths while they slowly turn Leatherface from a villain to an anti-hero, but come on now.

4. The real estate agent knew about Leatherface living in the basement...yet didn't bother to tell anyone. He doesn't even force Heather to read her Grandma's letter before sending them in that potential death trap.

5. "Welcome to Texas!" You moron! YOU are the visitor, not him!

6. "Do your thing Cuz". WHAT. THE. FUCK.

I could go on and on, but why bother? My friend owes me big time for dragging me through this piece of shit. And I actually liked the 2003 remake and prequel follow up.

1/2 star for the sort of Jigsaw cameo.
Old 01-04-13 | 09:27 PM
  #188  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

There are plenty of things to be pissed off about this one. The tone was way off and the script sucked donkey dick as well as the timeline and execution. The gore was half baked and the characters were as dumb as they come. Nobody is going to simply watch a silly iphone video chat while one guy goes in after a mass murderer that has presumably been dead for decades and now suddenly is on the rampage again. And the chainsaw toss, while somewhat amusing, was way of kilter for a serious Chainsaw movie.
Old 01-04-13 | 09:30 PM
  #189  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by Dean Kousoulas
1. When does this movie take place? Besides the first one took place in '74, which would put Heather in her mid to late 30's. Why is she 20 something here? Did any of the tombstones have dates on them? They showed an iPhone with Facetime so I'm assuming this is present day?
This annoyed me throughout the movie. I was looking for the dates on the tombstones for just this reason and her grandmother's said 2012.
Old 01-04-13 | 09:31 PM
  #190  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

And the uses of the names Carson and Hooper were quite moronic. I know what they were trying to do there but it takes you right out of this fictional universe of fear that they were trying to create but failed miserably at. I can't honestly say that I was nervous or scared once during this movie.
Old 01-04-13 | 09:34 PM
  #191  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by onebyone
This annoyed me throughout the movie. I was looking for the dates on the tombstones for just this reason and her grandmother's said 2012.
These guys simply cut and pasted what they wanted to without thinking about how stupid the final outcome of this shitbag would be. It will be hard for me to watch the original again without thinking about all the hicks and dumbasses that suddenly show up minutes later and ended up spoiling what I thought could have been the only redeeming moments of this "followup". The Sawyer clan was meant to be a small and believable group of psychos and not this large, redneck looking family that tries to justify their maniacal behavior by saying that he was "protecting the family". From who? People that happen to run out of gas or are looking for help?
Old 01-04-13 | 10:33 PM
  #192  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Sounds like a fantastic train wreck, will watch on Netflix...streaming.
Old 01-05-13 | 12:07 AM
  #193  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by SuckaMC
Sounds like a fantastic train wreck, will watch on Netflix...streaming.
You will have to sign up for Netshits to stream this one.
Old 01-05-13 | 01:04 AM
  #194  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

dsa_shea thanks for taking one for the team. It sounds every bit the piece of shit we thought we might get.

As much as a fan as I am of this franchise (for better and for worse) this isn't as bad as The Next Generation is it? Sounds like it could be.
Hell, at least that one had MM chewing up the scenery...in a good way.
Old 01-05-13 | 01:36 AM
  #195  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

This is interesting, I wonder if other people who have also never seen a TCM movie have a better opinion of the movie
Old 01-05-13 | 02:28 AM
  #196  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

In all honesty this movie played like a Scream movie which I don't mind when I'm watching a Scream movie. Now, since this was a Chainsaw movie then I expect the tone to be a little more on the serious side. If you're going to use cheesy lines then at least make them clever and not eye rollers. There were a few spots where I even felt a bit embarassed for even watching this movie as it tested my intelligence and at an elementary level at that. Even my nine year old daughter walked out and said that the movie was stupid and she never felt scared. I really had no faith that this would deliver and that is why it didn't concern me to take my daughter and this movie didn't let me down as it failed as I expected it to.
Old 01-05-13 | 02:33 AM
  #197  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by GatorDeb
This is interesting, I wonder if other people who have also never seen a TCM movie have a better opinion of the movie
Well, my daughter has never seen any of the other movies so she has no previous convictions on what to expect and even at nine she wasn't impressed with this. I really only see the average teenage crowd taking a liking to this and the hardcore crowd laughing at it while pulling their hair out due to the sheer ridiculousness while shitting on the original at the same time.
Old 01-05-13 | 02:38 AM
  #198  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

I must be more easily amused than a nine-year-old

What's funny is that at the beginning of the film when they were showing the other versions of leatherface I thought they looked childish and fake compared to the current.

I read after the fact () there's a scene after the credits,
Spoiler:
the Millers talking to themselves in front of the mansion about tricking themselves back into Heather's good graces to get some money sprinkling and leatherface shown on the other side ready to cut into them.
Old 01-05-13 | 02:40 AM
  #199  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

Originally Posted by GatorDeb
I must be more easily amused than a nine-year-old

What's funny is that at the beginning of the film when they were showing the other versions of leatherface I thought they looked childish and fake compared to the current.

I read after the fact () there's a scene after the credits,
Spoiler:
the Millers talking to themselves in front of the mansion about tricking themselves back into Heather's good graces to get some money sprinkling and leatherface shown on the other side ready to cut into them.
They dropped the ball here as well where they could have had a homage dinner scene but for some reason that idea didn't even come to their simple screenwriting minds.
Old 01-05-13 | 02:42 AM
  #200  
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Re: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D (2012, some hack)

You need to watch the original one to see exactly why this new one, despite being more glossy and visually violent, is a piece of shit. There is just no excuse in trying to humanize Leatherface or the rest of his family.


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