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Homer: Hmmm, they've got the Internet for computers now . . .
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the best one is Bart "can't sleep, clown'll get me"
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and I just thought of another one. Bart, Milhouse and Nelson have a fake ID and the coming walking out the theater and on the marquee it says Naked Lunch. Bart says "I can think of two things wrong with that title."
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Originally posted by explosivej Originally posted by iaido Originally posted by rabbit77 "So anyway, I says to Mabel, I says..." Also from that episode: "Come on Marge, less artsy, more fartsy." |
Originally posted by iaido BART- "No offense Homer, but your half-assed underparenting was a whole lot more fun than your half-assed overparenting. HOMER- "But I was using my whole a**." My favorite no one said yet: A stomach-aching Homer saying "Maybe I shouldn't have eaten that packet of powdered gravy I found in the parking lot." Homer in chocolate land surrounded by free chocolate looking in the candy store window & saying "Chocolate! Half-price!" |
"Homer. Homer! HOMER!"
"Oh, I'm sorry, we were talking about the land of chocolate?" "That was ten minute ago!" |
A beautiful model is standing by a car offered as a prize at a car show.
Man (filling out entry form) - "Do you come with the car?" Model - "Heehee, oh you!" Homer (filling out entry form) - "Do you come with the car?" Model - "Heehee, oh you!" |
A little side note on the quotes: Part of the fun is to not reference where it comes from. If you're a huge fan you'll know exactly where it comes from. Like the "Mabel" quote. The more obscure it is, the more fun in trying to figure out what episode they came from. I suggest not giving any background info on the quote, just say the quote. Of course, this is just a suggestion, you can take it or leave it.
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In the spirit of the odd "Mabel" moment... I've always liked:
Homer - "So I gave up tap for jazz, and I never regretted it. And here's why:" :) - M |
All in a song:
Apu - "Who needs the Quik-E-Mart?" Marge - "Their floors are sticky-mart." Lisa - "They made Dad sicky-mart." Bart - "Let's hurl a bricky-mart!" Homer - "The Quik-E-Mart is…DOH!" |
Originally posted by brianluvdvd
My favorite no one said yet: A stomach-aching Homer saying "Maybe I shouldn't have eaten that packet of powdered gravy I found in the parking lot." Originally posted by rabbit77 A little side note on the quotes: Part of the fun is to not reference where it comes from. If you're a huge fan you'll know exactly where it comes from. Like the "Mabel" quote. The more obscure it is, the more fun in trying to figure out what episode they came from. I suggest not giving any background info on the quote, just say the quote. Of course, this is just a suggestion, you can take it or leave it. |
Originally posted by iaido Well, i have hundreds of Simpsons episodes on tape, and i watch it at least once a day, so if i cant remeber which episode had the "Mabel" quote, well, i'm not ashmed to find out. Lets not start suggesting rules... Anyway, like I said, it's just a suggestion, not a rule. Take it or leave it. Here's one: "New! Flesh eating virus inside!" |
(On the episode where the town turns against science,
everybody burns this science building and this robot on fire comes out) Robot: Why was I programmed to feel pain! THIS IS THE BEST ONE-LINER EVER ON THE SIMPSONS |
Okay, here's one that relies on context.
Homer just gets done watching a mind-numbing brainwashing tape praising the virtues of the movementarians. Then comments on what he saw: "So, the cops knew that Internal Affairs was setting them up?" |
Originally posted by sundog Okay, here's one that relies on context. Homer just gets done watching a mind-numbing brainwashing tape praising the virtues of the movementarians. Then comments on what he saw: "So, the cops knew that Internal Affairs was setting them up?" That's a good one. Here's one that was just aired on syndication this week: Marge: Where's Lisa? I don't see her out there dancing. Homer: "SHHHH! The plot is hard enough to follow." |
Monty Burns at the ballet:
"Bah!---Far too much dancing, not nearly enough prancing!" |
Mr. Burns (holding back tears) - "Smithers, do think it was my power-plant that killed those ducks?"
Smithers - "There's no question about it sir." Burns (still tearing up) - "Excellent." Add to the fact that they're in BEAN-BAG CHAIRS, and what you got is something hilarious! |
Originally posted by sundog Add to the fact that they're in BEAN-BAG CHAIRS, and what you got is something hilarious! |
Another of my favorites (feel free to correct the quote as I know it's not exact)...
Lisa: Bart! What have you done with my science project??? Bart: I have hidden it in a secret location. To discover it, I have devised a series of clues, each one more mind-boggling than... Lisa: Found it! :) - M |
Bart to Homer: "What religion are you?"
Homer: "Hmmm, what's the one with all the well-meaning rules that never work in real life?" Bart: "Christianity?" Homer: "Bingo! That's it." |
"Oh boy, Flipsy! You and I are going on a road trip!"
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Chief (Pig/Wig)gum: An Esquilax the Mythical horse born with the head of a rabbit and the body of… a rabbit. Ohh look he's galloping away.
Bart: Hey, Jerk Face! …you have the face of a Jerk. Leonard Nimoy: Live Long and Prosper Mayor Quimby: May the Force be with you Leonard Nimoy: Do you even know who I am? Mayor Quimby: I think I do, weren't you one of the little Rascals? Homer: Um, it's like, uh…did anyone see the Movie Tron? Dr. Hibert: No Lisa: No Chief Wiggum: No Marge: No Bart: No Patty: No Chief Wiggum: No Flanders: No Selma: No Prof. Frink: No Rev. Lovejoy: No Chief Wiggum: Yes. I mean, uh, I mean no. No. Homer: Oh everything's cruel according to you. Keeping him chained up in the backyard is cruel. Pulling on his tail is cruel. Yelling in his ears is cruel.Everything is cruel. Well excuse me if I'm cruel! Marge: Bart says he won him (Laddie) at a church carnival, two towns over. Lisa: In a truth-telling contest. Right, Bart? Bart: Uh, to the best of my recollection, yes. |
Once agian, maybe not exact, but...
HOMER: "Every time I learn something new it pushes something else out of my brain. Remember that time I took that wine appreciation class and forgot how to drive?" MARGE: "Thats because you were drunk on wine." HOMER: "Mmmmm, and how." ____________________________________________________________ headlineS- BIG FAT MAN HAS BIG FAT HEART - BURNS BIRTHDAY, CREDITS LONG LIFE TO SATAN |
I dont know any simpsons quotes :D
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see my sig.
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