The Office "Dwight's Speech" 03-02-06
03-02-06 | 06:08 AM
#2
Thread Starter
DVD Talk Legend
Dwight's blog
http://blogs.nbc.com/office/
Dwight Schrute, assistant regional manager, Dunder Mifflin Paper
Products with another installment of Schrutespace.
This blog is going to rock you like a hurricane.
For the past eight years, my cousin Mose and I have been
collaborating on a breakthrough book on sales and selling. I draw on
my experience as a salesman and Mose draws on the fact that he has a
lot of spare time on his hands these days as the beets have all been
harvested.
Our magnum opus is entitled:
SELL THIS!: How to Literally Kill the Competition by Dwight and Mose
Schrute.
Here is a small sample.
CHAPTER 1
THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS WRONG
Question: Why do retailers say ‘the customer is always right’?
Answer: I have no idea.
The customer doesn’t know sh**. Seriously. If it were up to them,
they wouldn’t buy anything from you. They would just go along with
the products and services that they have and not buy more paper from
you (or whatever else you might be selling to them, such as office
supplies.)
How do we change the customer?
Simple. Convince them that they need to buy what you are selling.
How?
Easy. Like a tiger which hypnotizes it’s prey, you must overwhelm
them with the force of your
1) aura
2) eyes
3) intensity
4) reason
5) good prices
Seduce them with your power and get to know them like a small lover.
Intimacy sells! Ravish them. Use force if necessary. Kiss them
with your products. And, finally, make sure you call them the next day.
That is just a taste of Schrute. Just a glimpse of the sales
opportunities that await you and your cousin.
That is all.
Dwight K. Schrute
PS I have formed an internet page in order to gain more sales and
give more sales tips. It is called www.myspace.com/dwightkschrute
Products with another installment of Schrutespace.
This blog is going to rock you like a hurricane.
For the past eight years, my cousin Mose and I have been
collaborating on a breakthrough book on sales and selling. I draw on
my experience as a salesman and Mose draws on the fact that he has a
lot of spare time on his hands these days as the beets have all been
harvested.
Our magnum opus is entitled:
SELL THIS!: How to Literally Kill the Competition by Dwight and Mose
Schrute.
Here is a small sample.
CHAPTER 1
THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS WRONG
Question: Why do retailers say ‘the customer is always right’?
Answer: I have no idea.
The customer doesn’t know sh**. Seriously. If it were up to them,
they wouldn’t buy anything from you. They would just go along with
the products and services that they have and not buy more paper from
you (or whatever else you might be selling to them, such as office
supplies.)
How do we change the customer?
Simple. Convince them that they need to buy what you are selling.
How?
Easy. Like a tiger which hypnotizes it’s prey, you must overwhelm
them with the force of your
1) aura
2) eyes
3) intensity
4) reason
5) good prices
Seduce them with your power and get to know them like a small lover.
Intimacy sells! Ravish them. Use force if necessary. Kiss them
with your products. And, finally, make sure you call them the next day.
That is just a taste of Schrute. Just a glimpse of the sales
opportunities that await you and your cousin.
That is all.
Dwight K. Schrute
PS I have formed an internet page in order to gain more sales and
give more sales tips. It is called www.myspace.com/dwightkschrute
03-02-06 | 06:41 AM
#3
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I've been psyched for a new episode of The Office. The Winter Olympics couldn't have been over soon enough for me. :-)
Both this week and next week sound potentially great... so I've got high hopes.
This show is just flat out hilarious.
Both this week and next week sound potentially great... so I've got high hopes.
This show is just flat out hilarious.
03-02-06 | 06:58 AM
#5
Thread Starter
DVD Talk Legend
Originally Posted by ylomnstr
Was The Office a repeat last week? My DVR didn't record it, and if it was new, I'll be MAD!
03-02-06 | 07:09 AM
#6
Originally Posted by Chew
PS I have formed an internet page in order to gain more sales and
give more sales tips. It is called www.myspace.com/dwightkschrute
give more sales tips. It is called www.myspace.com/dwightkschrute
Haha, check out Pam's TV interests:http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm...endid=27753303
03-02-06 | 12:30 PM
#11
DVD Talk Special Edition
Good article about the show up on another site - good read:
http://www.zap2it.com/tv/news/zap-03...p-tv-headlines
http://www.zap2it.com/tv/news/zap-03...p-tv-headlines
03-02-06 | 01:23 PM
#12
DVD Talk Special Edition
Thought the episode was lacking somewhat. Don't want to post anymore since I don't want to spoil, but I'm hoping someone can provide a translation...
03-02-06 | 08:53 PM
#16
DVD Talk Hall of Fame
Oh, man. When this season's DVD set gets released, they have got to include a bonus featuring Dwight's full speech.
Jenna's really been making the rounds: on the "Today" show this morning, Martha Stewart's show this afternoon, and on Conan's show tonight.
Not that I'm complaining.
Jenna's really been making the rounds: on the "Today" show this morning, Martha Stewart's show this afternoon, and on Conan's show tonight.
Not that I'm complaining.
03-02-06 | 09:00 PM
#18
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From: H-Town, TX
An average episode.......yet I still laughed out loud several times. Tells you how great this show is. Angela's words of encouragement to Dwight(spell his name right, damn it!
) and Kevin's face after he said what he set the thermostat to were my favorite parts.
) and Kevin's face after he said what he set the thermostat to were my favorite parts.
03-02-06 | 09:01 PM
#19
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I'm not one to laugh out loud too many times when I'm watching television by myself... but I had a great extended laugh when Dwight took down Stanley during the football horseplay. Hilarious... :-)
03-02-06 | 09:43 PM
#22
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From: Guelph, Ontario
A decent episode... Jim is leaving JUNE 8... My heart sank with Pam's... they really know how to work this whole Jim/Pam thing...I mean, it was only about 1min of the episode and it was perfect. Dwights speeches were hilarious.
"Good Morning Vietnam!"
MATT
"Good Morning Vietnam!"
MATT
03-02-06 | 10:53 PM
#24
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All I can say is that Dwight is owning this show. The Dwight/Michael/Ryan relationship is hilarious and great.
I just can't wait until they get away from the Pam/Dawn/Jim/Tim plotline. Dawn seemed like the type that would go for that dumb lug, but Pam doesn't seem like that type. Hope they don't drag it out.
I just can't wait until they get away from the Pam/Dawn/Jim/Tim plotline. Dawn seemed like the type that would go for that dumb lug, but Pam doesn't seem like that type. Hope they don't drag it out.