Not only was the guy I hired recommended by our people in Denver, he assured me he wasn't going to go crazy like the previous one, yet now I have to cut my vacation short because the hotel's been abandoned, the radio's broken, there's holes in the doors, and for some reason the cook is laying dead in the lobby.

General Hummel is fighting for what's right; after becoming aware of a scandal in which the families of recon marines who died during service were not compensated by the US military, he decides to expose the truth. He hires a rag tag group of marines to get the attention of the only man who can get him the money he needs to make things right; the President. But his mission goes astray when a former British agent teams up with a chemical weapons specialist to stop him at any cost.

Some salty dude, a hippy and a cop try to kill me because I was hungry and ate something I shouldn't have.

An empathetic father tries to bridge the gap between his high strung wife and their annoying teenage daughter, who refuses to be called by her original name.


The pint sized member of a tight knit community is smitten with an irascible single mom whose daughter was murdered. He finally manages to snag a date with her after she firebombs a police station, but it all ends disastrously for him when her ex shows up.


A gay artist in the 60s struggles with unemployment and discrimination but finds happiness watching movies with his deaf mute best friend before he risks his life to help her have sex with a fish man.


A bearded woman who refuses to shave falls in with a group of "freaks" who are exploited by a happy-go-lucky showman who loves to sing and dance. After he refuses to allow her into a high society get together, she is finally inspired to perform her own song and dance routine -- a catchy empowerment anthem that is decades ahead of its time.

Love this

Honeywell engineer tries to romance his old high school crush.

Hard-working and devoted assistant to a fashion magazine editor falls ill and has her position in the company usurped by a fat and poorly dressed subordinate.

A Confederate officer in the Civil War who marries his longtime sweetheart is alarmed at the persistent affections of his wife's conniving and willful best friend, about whom his wife believes nothing bad. After the war, and on her third husband, the best friend continues to pine for him.

A black piano player with dreams of freedom and autonomy in Europe is whisked by his white boss from Paris to a sleazy little dive in Morocco, filled with gamblers, Nazis and grubby refugees, where he has to play cheesy pop tunes on a rinky-dink piano while customers call him "Boy." When the boss makes plans to leave, he "sells" the pianist to an even sleazier club. Is there no way out for Sam?

Baked good viciously attacked by horny teenager.

San Francisco florist is devestated by the suicide of her favorite customer.

Bravo!

A mission-critical computer onboard a special spaceship, suddenly realizes the human crew is harming the mission and must be stopped before they can disconnect him.

An overly-curious member of a ragtag space crew inspects an odd-looking egg. After a nap and a meal, he does what no man has done before: dies in labor.

A music teacher cleverly succeeds in getting the most out of his student by mentally abusing the shit out of him.


People are too fucking noisy! They must DIE!!!


A lonely man takes in a young woman and gives her free room and board, sheltering her from the harshness of the outside world. They later have a child together, but the woman yearns for more freedom and betrays him when she pretends that their child has died, causing him to flee in desperation.



A handsome middle-aged astronaut fights to survive along with his female co-worker following a freak accident in space that leaves them stranded. He finally decides to float away and die rather than spend one more minute with a woman his own age.
(a nod of the cap to T&A)

A Puerto Rican dressmaker watches in anguish as her boyfriend's younger sister takes up with a white gang member, resulting in tragedy for all.

A hardened police lieutenant working the slums of Manhattan's west side is beside himself when the violent gangs he tries to contain suddenly take to the streets to sing and dance with reckless abandon.

A hapless social worker is pleasantly surprised when two competing street gangs of different races stage an elaborately choreographed dance number during a social that he's organized at the local gym. The hours of rehearsal they must have spent together can only mean his efforts to reconcile their differences have succeeded.

A deadbeat Vietnam vet goes on a murder spree wiping out small town police force.

Nuclear power plant executives try to stop liberal news organization from printing fake news about their plant's safety.

After committing murder, a one armed man tries to evade the vengeance of man falsely accused of the murder.

A college dean tries to protect the school's reputation by putting renegade fraternity on double secret probation.

I barely escape with my margaritas after a flying dinosaur attack.