Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

I'd actually be game for either of those, is it bad that I could picture Nic Cage in a movie where (massive Oldboy spoiler)

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Star Wars with no involvement from George Lucas.

Wait a minute...oh, sorry...that's a GOOD idea. ;)

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Raiders of the Lost Ark

Indiana Jones = Nathan Fillion
Marion Ravenwood = Taylor Cole, Angelina Jolie, or Kate Beckinsale?
Sallah = Oded Fehr

Joss Whedon = Script and/or Director

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

You guys need to be careful. H'wood would consider any of these (luckily, most of these are too costly and star-driven to greenlight). Especially if the original had insightful writing, a good sense of humor or even cool characters - the first things they throw away in the remake.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Dude, I know many women who would FLOCK to this film based on the names in bold and to a lesser degree, Joss Whedon.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

<b>Pulp Fiction</b> remake with either an all female cast or every gender simply swapped for the opposite sex.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

I have no idea how he does it, but joss is a fucking pussy magnet.. one girl I know calls him her "fake husband" /sigh

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Braveheart with Vin Diesel or Dwayne Johnson as William Wallace......

Lets see them pull that Prima Nocte shit this time.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

How about Braveheart with Mel Gibson, but you know, made today.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

With jewish people for him to slander? It might work

His speech may be a little disturbing though..

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Judd Apatow's remake of "Clerks" with Michael Cera and Jesse Eisenberg improvising dialogue for an hour and a half where at the end they both win over their lady loves and get better jobs. Goodbye punchy, well thought out, insightful dialogue; hello box office gold! Later to released as an extra "wacky" 30 minute longer Unrated Edition on Blu ray! More unscripted dialogue!

With Jonah Hill and Seth Rogen as Jay and Talking Bob.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

I'm sorry to say, PatD.....but you're imagining for a bad remake is weak. Others' takes on that have been very solid. Yours are just eh...

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

^^How so? I thought they were pretty close to the mark on how Hollywood would do it.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

a 'Wizard of Oz' remake has been in the pipeline for awhile with initial rumours that director John ('Excalibur') Boorman would be behind the camera - now THAT would have been really really interesting.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

This reminded me that Reeves is actually trying to get into the live action remake of Akira (a horribly Blasphemous idea to begin with) to play Kaneda.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Casablanca, directed by Baz Luhrman starring:

Matthew McConaughey as Rick
Kate Hudson as Ilsa
and Samuel L. Jackson as Sam

Set in the near future. North Africa is in turmoil as civil wars and uprisings rage throughout the region. American expatriate and former Delta Force operative Rick struggles to keep his restaurant/club running amidst all the chaos while also dealing with the ghosts of his past (insert flashbacks to The Battle of Mogadishu where he lost his brother and best friend). And then she walks in. Ilsa, The One Who Got Away. She seeks his help as she needs his Delta Force training to rescue her journalist husband Victor, who has been captured by Al-Qaeda terrorists and taken to their compound in the remote Atlas Mountains. Can Rick atone for his past sins? Will the flames of passion between Rick and Ilsa be re-ignited? Can Rick undertake an impossible mission? Can Samuel L. Jackson learn how to play that damn song? Find out in Casablanca. Coming to a theatre near you this Christmas. In 3D, of course.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Ah, but there's good news - as of today, Hollywood has continued to say no to the Tom Hanks reboot of It's A Wonderful Life.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

They are remaking the Wizard of Oz. Or sorry I mean "re-imagining" it.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

I'm sure they're re-imagining into the latest Playstation 3/Nintendo Wii RPG game posing as a movie. Pass.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

The Godfather:
Don Vito Corleone - Ice Cube
Michael Corleone - Mos Def
Santino 'Sonny' Corleone - Snoop Dogg
Kay Adams - Beyoncé

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

I would argue that the most cinematically blasphemous remake imaginable has already been made: The Vanishing.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

I'd be up for that. I find that movie to be complete and utter shit and Tom Hanks is a much better actor than Jimmy Stewart was.

Maybe I could actually tolerate watching more than 5 minutes of a new "It's a Wonderful Life".

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Will Ferrell is The Tramp in...CITY LIGHTS.

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

Oddly, it's because of the remake that I searched out the original.

When did the Spice Girls become a boys band? ;)

Re: The Most Cinematically Blasphemous Remake One Can Imagine!
 

For a long time I've had this idea in my head to remake Pulp Fiction with The Muppets.

A shot-for-shot remake, with the shooting script, starring:

Kermit as Vincent Vega
Gonzo as Jules Winnfield
Miss Piggy as Mia Wallace
Fozzy Bear as Butch Coolidge
Sam the Eagle as Marcellus Wallace
Swedish Chef as Winston Wolf
Janice as Honey Bunny
Scooter as Pumpkin
Rowlf the Dog as Captain Koons