Funny Movie Review Site
07-13-99, 04:04 AM
#1
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I found an interesting movie review site the other day at: http://www.capalert.com . They review movies from a religous/moral point of view. They love movies like Mary Poppins and hate most others like Austin Powers (for obvious reasons).
For example:
"Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace" (PG) -- Not one. No, not one single instance of foul language or nudity or sexual activity was noted! And no drugs/alcohol! And not one instance of God's name in vain with or without the four letter expletive! Good job, Lucas!
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*South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut* (R) -- WARNING! This analysis is blunt. *South Park* is another movie straight from the smoking pits of Hell. *South Park* is an *incredibly dangerous* movie for those who do not understand or are developing an understanding of the Gospel ....... INCREDIBLY dangerous...The most foul of the foul words was clearly spoken *by the children* at least 131 times and many other times in a muffled or garbled way. The three/four letter word vocabulary was used at least 119 times. God's name in vain was used 11 times without the four letter expletive and 6 times with it. And many times the child characters were saying things like "What's the big deal" (about the foul language). "Suck my --", "Let's ([homo]sexual intercourse)", and repeated questions about a female private organ were but a very few of the vulgar expressions used by the kids.
For example:
"Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace" (PG) -- Not one. No, not one single instance of foul language or nudity or sexual activity was noted! And no drugs/alcohol! And not one instance of God's name in vain with or without the four letter expletive! Good job, Lucas!
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*South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut* (R) -- WARNING! This analysis is blunt. *South Park* is another movie straight from the smoking pits of Hell. *South Park* is an *incredibly dangerous* movie for those who do not understand or are developing an understanding of the Gospel ....... INCREDIBLY dangerous...The most foul of the foul words was clearly spoken *by the children* at least 131 times and many other times in a muffled or garbled way. The three/four letter word vocabulary was used at least 119 times. God's name in vain was used 11 times without the four letter expletive and 6 times with it. And many times the child characters were saying things like "What's the big deal" (about the foul language). "Suck my --", "Let's ([homo]sexual intercourse)", and repeated questions about a female private organ were but a very few of the vulgar expressions used by the kids.
07-13-99, 04:06 PM
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A friend sent me this site's address the other day. I'm going to refrain from saying too much, as I don't want to offend anyone, but...I found his terrible, immature, uninformed reviews almost offensive in how atrociously bad they were (from a cinematic standpoint). And the site itself is unattractive. All in all, if you want to laugh hysterically, visit it. It gave me the biggest laughs I'd had in weeks. 
--Heather
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http://www.dvdtracker.com/~ahber16.asp
--Heather
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http://www.dvdtracker.com/~ahber16.asp
07-13-99, 04:17 PM
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The funniest movie site on the net...even if it is unintentionally so. For more laughs, check out "www.filmthreat.com". Sarcastic, hilarious, and sometimes downright cruel.
jim
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http://www.dvdtracker.com/~gamblor187.asp
jim
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http://www.dvdtracker.com/~gamblor187.asp
07-15-99, 10:58 PM
#4
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I enjoyed what they said about Tarzan:
The amount of exposure of the curvature of Tarzan's glutemous maximi and other pelvic and crotch areas was a true measure of the lowering of the threshold of acceptance of what is to be presented to our kids at earlier and earlier ages.
And A Bug's Life:
A significantly inappropriate scene presented a story character igniting the stream out of a can of lighter fluid with a match.
Additional examples of questionable programming:
-- mystic incantations and calling upon the psychic twice
-- eating manure
-- a barroom scene
-- gambling
-- lies
-- "Got in touch with your feminine side" to a male character
The amount of exposure of the curvature of Tarzan's glutemous maximi and other pelvic and crotch areas was a true measure of the lowering of the threshold of acceptance of what is to be presented to our kids at earlier and earlier ages.
And A Bug's Life:
A significantly inappropriate scene presented a story character igniting the stream out of a can of lighter fluid with a match.
Additional examples of questionable programming:
-- mystic incantations and calling upon the psychic twice
-- eating manure
-- a barroom scene
-- gambling
-- lies
-- "Got in touch with your feminine side" to a male character
