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My wife is away for the weekend. Gimme some lube.

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My wife is away for the weekend. Gimme some lube.

Old 04-29-05, 05:30 PM
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My wife is away for the weekend. Gimme some lube.

My wife flew out of Newark this morning for a weekend in the Chigago area to take care of some business and to visit a few friends so I'm a bachelor for the weekend.

So what should I do?
Getting drunk and shooting out the TV is always fun, but's it kind of been done.

How bout some suggestions?
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Old 04-29-05, 05:33 PM
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Do what I did: experiment with teriyaki recipes!!!!!! Crazy, eh?
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Old 04-29-05, 05:39 PM
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Run for your life man!
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Old 04-29-05, 05:39 PM
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masturbate
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Old 04-29-05, 05:41 PM
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Pay a hooker to dress and act exactly like your wife and live in your house for the weekend.
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Old 04-29-05, 05:42 PM
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2 chicks at the same time man
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Old 04-29-05, 05:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Canadian Bacon
2 chicks at the same time man
damn it! beat me to it
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Old 04-29-05, 05:49 PM
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Old 04-29-05, 05:50 PM
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So far I've changed the litter boxes, put the trash out by the curb, and fed the cats.
I think I need to snap things up a bit.
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Old 04-29-05, 05:50 PM
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Two dumps at the same time man.
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Old 04-29-05, 06:12 PM
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Orgy.
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Old 04-29-05, 06:21 PM
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Give Wooderson a call and hit Red Lobster.
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Old 04-29-05, 06:23 PM
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grandma porno binge
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Old 04-29-05, 06:32 PM
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Celebrate!
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Old 04-29-05, 06:48 PM
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Completely clean the house, do all of the yard work (ya know, if you have a yard and all) and organize everything. When she comes home from her trip, she'll be so happy and you'll earn a gold star for your chart.
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Old 04-29-05, 06:56 PM
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Eat pizza every meal and piss in the sink.
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Old 04-29-05, 07:04 PM
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Golden Girls marathon.
BYOL
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Old 04-29-05, 07:14 PM
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Originally Posted by Kittydreamer
Completely clean the house, do all of the yard work (ya know, if you have a yard and all) and organize everything. When she comes home from her trip, she'll be so happy and you'll earn a gold star for your chart.
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Old 04-29-05, 07:19 PM
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what is a gold star? if the husband accumulate's so many of em, does he get some sex or something?
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Old 04-29-05, 07:20 PM
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Your weekend mission, Phil, should you decide to accept it, is to go to CostCo and find out how much a Mega Splash Waterslide is and report the price here.

As always, should you or any of your I. M. Force be caught or killed, the Secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions.
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Old 04-29-05, 07:25 PM
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Originally Posted by WillieTheShakes
Golden Girls marathon.
BYOL
Bring Your Own Lotion?
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Old 04-29-05, 07:32 PM
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Originally Posted by Kittydreamer
Completely clean the house, do all of the yard work (ya know, if you have a yard and all) and organize everything. When she comes home from her trip, she'll be so happy and you'll earn a gold star for your chart.
And maybe she'll give ya some when she gets back!!
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Old 04-29-05, 07:41 PM
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So far I've been drinking beer and alternating between online porn and the Yankee game on TV.
In other words...the same as most every day.
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Old 04-29-05, 08:05 PM
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What every you do - don't do very bad things
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Old 04-29-05, 08:05 PM
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If you don't know what to do when your wife is away for the weekend, you either need to get a divorce or check your pants for a penis or both.

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