The first character we meet is Particle Man, simply a guy who is able to perform the same activities as a particle, though his personality is irrelevant to our purposes. One might ask, if he is a particle, what is his shape or form? Is his body dot-like or more similar to that of a speck? If one was grasping for more information on this enigmatic fellow, one could even ask, when immersed in water, would this miniscule being even be affected so much as to become sodden with said water, or might, in fact, *he* overcome the liquid? One would then be given the unsatisfying response that the answer has not yet been discovered.

Then along comes Triangle Man, who inexpicably loathes this mysterious atom. We can then infer that Triangle Man is a very narrow-minded individual; after all, if nothing is known of Particle Man other than that he acts like the very molecule from which his namesake is derived, what grounds could Triangle Man possibly base his abhorrance on? Triangle Man, we learn, is involved in a duel with the very man he detests, and immerges victorious. We can only assume that the tussle was unprovoked.

After a melodious yet comical instrumental break, Universe Man enters the picture. One could presume that this is a moniker for the Lord Himself. "Size of the entire universe man" could very well be a hasty metaphor for God's omnipresence. "Usually kinder to smaller man" describes The Almighty's stance towards his children, in that kindness is rewarded but sinners are punished. The idea that God is around for a long time (indeed, for ALL time) is echoed in the line "He's got a watch with a minute hand, millenium hand and an eon hand." "When they meet it's a happy land" describes our tendency to celebrate madly after a long period of time passes, such as a millenium. Universe Man's verse closes after a reminder that He is a "Powerful Man."

The last new character in this heavy song is Person Man. We are given some background information on Person Man, in that he had been smote with a cooking device and now makes a can filled with discarded objects his home. One wonders if such a turn of events would lead Person Man to become dispirited or just plain screwed up, even convinced his life is devoid of meaning. This brings up a very good point: Who was it that created Person Man? The song cryptically responds, "Degraded man, Person Man," leaving us to wonder if this means that the author of Person Man was himself reduced far below ordinary standards of civilized life and conduct, or if the question was rhetorical, and Person Man is still the subject.

Triangle Man, still fresh from his struggle with Particle Man, arrives on the scene. His reputation as one who abhors people without a proper explanation is continued, for Person Man is still desperate for the answer to his existence and certaintly has enough problems on his hands without having a belligerent polygon take him on. Triangle Man again defeats his opponent.

The song repeats the catchy solo that is so out of place in this strangely violent ditty.