One of the great things about anime is that there's such a wide variety of art styles on display. Yes, most of what comes here to the U.S. is done in a certain formulaic "big-eyed" style that I find annoying at times myself, but there's so much other anime that's not like that. Granted, you have to be a fanatic like me to seek it all out. It's hard to do on my old home computer, but I'd love to share some screen grabs that show the different styles of anime available. I put some of them in my post in the List thread.

Japanese voice acting is generally very tempered, measured and subtle. I think you've been watching--and listening to--the wrong things.

And there's so much great music done on anime soundtracks by the likes of such great composers as Jo Hisaishi, Kenji Kawai, Yoko Kanno, Taro Iwashiro, Taku Iwasaki, Michiru Oshima, etc. that don't fit the description you give of anime soundtracks.

I blind-bought Cowboy Bebop after hearing the theme music. Recognized the style years later in Darker Than Black.