This is Hip Hop, I'm not sure how many people on this board actually listen to that genre since I rarely see threads on this forum about it but I figured I'd post them anyways since I'm always looking for feedback/opinions. Thanks

http://www.reverbnation.com/torchur

Not a fan of the genre but I can appreciate when it's good and you've done a very good job. From the technical side, I would not "punch" in the lyrical sampling when you are rapping; perhaps a tighter loop on the sample and interject the sampled lyrics in your second verse. Also, add some effects to your lyric samples and don't be afraid to do reversing and time-stretching.

Keep up the good work man, you've got the ear for pleasant music.

Thanks for checking it out & dropping your opinion, I appreciate it.

What's up? I've been recording alot lately so I wanted to post some stuff I did last night. The first track is very personal to me. "The Otherside" talks about when I almost died & found out I had diabetes. Pro Bangers produced it, sampled the RHC. The next track is "Verbal Artillery III". The other two were featured on Phantazm II & my solo "Elevated Mind State". Scissor Hands produced this one. Give them a listen & let me know what you think. Thanks....

FYI this is pretty much a dead forum.

Yeah I noticed.... lol

Sorry dude i dont like it. Lyrics are cheesy (my lyrics get stuck in your head like ear wax)? Cmon bro... and you did more than "sample" Otherside, sounds more like a remix with a rap. Can't cry no more is descent, but your accent is too distracting. The way you stress your "R"s you just don't hear in hip hop.

Lyrics are not cheesy at all, you never heard of metaphors or punchlines? My stuff is pretty complex. Maybe you just didn't understand them? As for "The Otherside", I wouldn't say it's a remix at all. It's nothing like the original track, I just sampled it. My accent? lol I didn't know I had one, thanks for checking them out. I appreciate it....

I believe it was Tolstoy who first said, "My lyrics get stuck in your head like ear wax."

Sorry bro Im not trying to put you down or make fun but as far as the RHCP song IMO it is definitely more than just a sample. You have half of the chorus from the song in there...TWICE in your chorus...and the guitar riff throughout the entire song. "Mouth so dry cant stop drinking / Blood sugar too high / Med students studied me like a freak / Diabetes never be the same /still in shock barely know my name." Those are not complex lyrics. Just the opposite.
You made a song about diabetes. When I hear about diabetes I think about my grandmother. Hip Hop/Rap is supposed to be tough... rapping about diabetes is not "street" at all lol.

Had a canker sore, went to the store. Said nice to meet 'ya, do ya have some milk of magnesia?

Chicka chika. Lay down some tracks, I'm done.

Who? Never heard of him/them....
Don't take this the wrong way because I really appreciate you taking the time to check out my tracks but lots of the stuff you said don't make any sense man. Not every rapper makes music only for the "streets" or tries to be "tough" in every track. If you actually paid attention to everything on that page. It's all real life/Hip Hop type stuff, most of it's personal like Can't Cry No More & The Otherside. Also, you are quoting lyrics from different parts of the actual song that don't go together or rhyme with each other so you not understanding what I said. Those are fine & based off what really happened to me. I deal with diabetes every day & I almost died from it so what's wrong with making a track about it? People sample tracks all the time, that includes a main melody & hooks too but it doesn't make it a remix to the original song because they are totally different subjects/lyrics/styles. Thanks for checking it out....

????

Hip Hop isn't really my thing, so take this for what it's worth:

Still Dedicated Sounds like generic hip-hop - not bad, but not memorable. Nice vocals, though.

Can't Cry No More Like the vibe and the beat, but the vocals seemed a bit too growly for the laid back music.

The Otherside Didn't like this at all. A less interesting version of the song you're sampling.

Verbal Artillery III I love this. Why is it so short? Reminds me of Dr. Octagon. Nice synchronization of the vocals with the music. I'd love to hear a longer version.

Overall, I think you've got a nice vocal style, but you need to marry it better to the music.

I didnt pay attention to everything on the page. You asked for people to listen to your tracks, thats what I did.
Just because you write a song that is personal to you or about something that happened in real life dont necessarily mean it's automatically gonna be good.
I know I was quoting lyrics from different parts of the song. I was giving examples of how I think some of the lyrics are corny.
Anyway, good luck man.

btw.. "i assassinate fools like por-chun-hi"? Whats that mean?

First, the bad... I like the production on Can't Cry No More, but I didn't like the rap flow on this track. The way you put that strong, accented emphasis on the rhyming words at the end of each line just drove me nuts. Especially in lines like "Somehow I just GET HER", "Anything to WIN HER" or "Music to MY EARS". It was all too stilted and dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-DAH-DAH, dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-DAH-DAH.

On the positive side, I thought the delivery sounded much better on Otherside... the faster pace just suits your vocal style more and the flow just felt much more natural. I didn't care as much for the production on that one... sampling aside, why repeat the chorus twice? The looping on the that first chorus repetition was sloppy and sounded more like a record skipping than a proper loop.

Just out of curiosity, what hip hop artists influence you?

That's really my style on the emphasis at the end. I'm always done that. The Hook repeated twice was all the producer but I actually liked the other hook after that break. I'm guessing it was done since it's a shorter track anyways & the hook is very solid/memorable. It didn't think it sounded sloppy at all, that's how it was set up. It was meant to come back in after the break. Some of my influences are: Wu Tang Clan, Nas, Esham, Natas, Ice Cube, Cypress Hill, Gravediggaz, Cykosis, Ganksta Nip, Brotha Lynch Hung, House of Krazees, Geto Boys, Dayton Family, & Chino XL. I appreciate you checking them out. Thanks....



Repeated the hook twice was after a little break in the beat

It's "I assassinate foes like Park Chung-Hee". I like throwing some history into my stuff & making people look into what it means or who that person was.

sounds like vanilla ice mixed with icp.

I'd check them out, but you don't seem to take criticism well.

Complex.

Listen to it again!