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So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

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So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Old 10-08-21, 05:42 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

And I was curious what's up with your trans kid? Are they seeing a specialist and is anyone talking about hormones?
I recently had one of my tween patients announce that he would now like to be referred to as a girl, bobbed their hair and wore a skirt. I was surprised, knowing this child for many years now. I immediately thought of you and your journey. I don't know if we have a center for those that want HRT with transitioning as a young teen, and honestly I don't know what should be done if should they ask for my assistance. All I know for sure is it's nothing I am comfortable prescribing. My thought was maybe refer the family to a Pediatric Endocrinologist.
Old 10-08-21, 07:45 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Sonny Corinthos View Post
If this is too personal of a question, by all means ignore it. I mean no disrespect when I ask this, but what is the end game of all this? Do you want to live your life as a woman? Do you want to date men? Is your wife still ok with this?

Like I said in my original post in this thread, I know absolutely nothing about this subject. I wish you the best of luck in your new journey and I hope everything turns out the way you want it. There are so many people in life that are miserable, I hope you find the happiness you are searching for. Good luck with everything!
No worries. I think I do want to live my life as a woman, but I'm still kinda just figuring this out, not trying to rush into anything. For now it's just to see how I feel on female hormones and go from there. I'm leaving open the possibility that I might at some point decide to back out, but this has been in the back of my head pretty much my entire life and I think that I would regret it later on if I never even tried it.

I am not interested in men, never was. I know that's weird to a lot of people, but it's really not that unusual in the trans community. I like women, but I also want to be one, and I always have. I'm a lesbian. If you're really interested, I think the blog entry that I cited in the OP explains it better than I could.

My wife is on board and does not want to separate, and neither do I. It helps a lot that she's bisexual.

Last edited by Obi-Wanma; 10-10-21 at 07:13 PM.
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Old 10-08-21, 07:55 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Decker View Post
And I was curious what's up with your trans kid? Are they seeing a specialist and is anyone talking about hormones?
I recently had one of my tween patients announce that he would now like to be referred to as a girl, bobbed their hair and wore a skirt. I was surprised, knowing this child for many years now. I immediately thought of you and your journey. I don't know if we have a center for those that want HRT with transitioning as a young teen, and honestly I don't know what should be done if should they ask for my assistance. All I know for sure is it's nothing I am comfortable prescribing. My thought was maybe refer the family to a Pediatric Endocrinologist.
My kid is seeing the same doctor that I am. We're definitely not rushing into anything for him. All he has done is met with the doctor and they have ordered some bloodwork. He still needs to see a therapist that specializes in this area (his current therapist does not), so we are getting that setup. The doctor will not prescribe anything to him until they get a letter from a therapist. Even then, they won't start him on hormones. He is too young for that. They will put him on blockers until he is at least 16, just to prevent his body from changing any more in ways that he does not want. If at some point he decides that he doesn't feel this way anymore, they can always take him off blockers and the female puberty would resume. That doesn't usually happen, but it's not unheard of.

I know even that scares some people but he was very angry and suicidal (which sounds ridiculous for someone his age, but it's true, I was there) before we began letting him express himself in this way, and he's just not anymore. I just want him to be happy and to live his life.
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Old 10-12-21, 09:30 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Mrs. Danger View Post
The Adventure Begins!
Eat your heart out Remo Williams.
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Old 10-13-21, 10:54 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

If you're interested in how my wife is handling this, I had this text exchange with her the other day (she's on the left). Made me cry at work. I love her so much.


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Old 10-13-21, 11:06 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

The last thread I read was the Marriage Advice one. It's good to see a couple love each other, as opposed to...
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Old 10-13-21, 11:13 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

I don't know, they keep calling each other 'Foo'. Mr. T would not approve of this marriage!
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Old 10-13-21, 11:24 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Lol. It's our pet name for each other. Honestly don't remember the story about how that came about.
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Old 10-13-21, 11:28 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Obi-Wanma View Post
Lol. It's our pet name for each other. Honestly don't remember the story about how that came about.
Dave Grohl approves.
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Old 10-13-21, 10:40 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by mndtrp View Post
The last thread I read was the Marriage Advice one. It's good to see a couple love each other, as opposed to...
Wait, is Obi-Wanma also changing her nationality to various random colonies of the British Empire?
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Old 10-13-21, 10:41 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Obi-Wanma View Post
If you're interested in how my wife is handling this, I had this text exchange with her the other day (she's on the left). Made me cry at work. I love her so much.
Hell, that made me cry!
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Old 12-04-21, 07:07 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

So it's been just about 2 months since I started hormones, guess it's time for an update.

So my skin is so much softer and my body hair growth has slowed to a crawl. The hair that I still have is so much softer. When I first started shaving my legs, months before I was on hormones, it would come back within a day or 2 and I would break out really bad from ingrown hairs. Now I'm smooth for almost a whole week and don't break out when it comes back. Facial hair growth is slower too, but still pretty rough. Thinking about lasering it soon.

I didn't notice a lot of emotional changes until really recently (like in the last week or so). I mean, I've always been very in touch with my emotions compared to most other men, but wow, I think I'm really a girl now. I've been crying all the time, sometimes for no discernable reason, for the last few days. It's so good though. It's mostly happy tears. I have never, ever been this happy with myself, at least not since before my first puberty. I never knew that it could be like this.

Things between my wife and I have never been better. We are still intimate, and I'm present mentally for the duration, which I almost never was before (because I had to imagine that I was something that I wasn't to get the job done). It's a completely different experience, and I love it. I feel sexy, which I absolutely never have before. It's amazing. My breasts are also budding and are getting sooo sensitive. I love this, and she does too!

I'm not presenting female in public yet, and I'm not out at all at work, but I feel like that's gotta come in the new year. I've been keeping this woman locked inside my whole life, and she is dying to get out. This was kind of a trial run and I was giving myself 3 months to see how it goes, but I think I'm already past the point of no return. After seeing what it's like running on the correct hormones, I don't think that I can go back to running on testosterone. I can't lock her up again, she's too happy.

Things are going well for my son as well. He had some issues at school with a couple of boys who were bullying him about not being a real boy, but he stood up for himself and got help from the social worker at the school. Talks were had and I think things are good for now. He had to go in to the doctor this week and have a breast exam for documentation to get him on blockers (required because insurance rejected it the first time). He wasn't happy about that, but I think they will be able to get him started soon.

Life is good!
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Old 12-04-21, 09:17 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

I'm really glad to hear how you and your family are all feeling in the whirlwind of so much change. Blessings on the journey!
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Old 12-04-21, 10:25 AM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Itís great to hear a (mostly) positive experience for such a difficult situation. I hope you all continue to do well.
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Old 12-04-21, 03:38 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Obi-Wanma View Post
Facial hair growth is slower too, but still pretty rough. Thinking about lasering it soon.
Please don't give my students any ideas. I've started my lazy pathetic excuse of a winter beard and one of my students is fascinated by the strange, old, white man growing facial hair. She comes in every day and tells me she can wax it for me. Ouch!

Back on track ... glad to hear things are going smoothly for you! (Pun intended!)
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Old 01-20-22, 12:59 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Not much to update for me, but some of you had trans kids of your own, and I'm wondering if you would be willing to talk about it with me if you have experience with blockers. My son's doctor prescribed Lupron injections as a puberty blocker, and what I found was the copay was over $3000 (I have a high deductible plan). That's for the first month. After that my deductible would be met, but then it would cost over $700 per month until my max out of pocket of $6000 is met. Then everything would be paid for until the end of the year, but obviously that would start over next year, and every year until he goes onto HRT, probably at 16.

Now I want to do what's best for him, but for me, that's a huge financial hit at the beginning of every year. I looked into copay assistance, and apparently it either doesn't exist or is negligible.

I've asked the doctor, and she says that there are oral options, such as Anastrozole, but that it's just an estrogen blocker and Lupron is better because it shuts down FSH and LH completely. That seems like it's covered at 100% by my insurance though, so huge cost difference.

If any of you have gone thru this, I'd be interested to talk about how you were able to finance it, or if you have experience with blockers other than Lupron. You can obviously DM me if you don't want to post that kind of information for everyone to read.
Old 01-20-22, 01:23 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

I'm not trying to hoist these problems somewhere else, but have you looked into any Facebook groups? I'm sure there are some for not just trans people but also parents of children who are trans. Having a concentration of like-minded people from all over sharing resources can be a powerful thing.

While not at all the same, I'm in various gardening and plant groups, Tesla car owners, dog training, ice cream makers, jarring and canning groups, and it's amazing the FAQs and such they are able to build up. Just those alone are amazing resources. It wouldn't surprise me if a parents of trans group has something similar with resources listed on counseling, navigating insurance, different medications, charities or groups that provide financial assistance and probably many more things that I haven't thought about.

I think Facebook is largely toxic, but it can be an incredibly useful tool depending on how you use it. And I think this is a topic that might be perfect for that.
Old 01-20-22, 01:28 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

I haven't tried Facebook, but I did try Reddit. I'll look around at Facebook though, thanks for the idea. I'm not expecting a lot of people here to know stuff about this, but I figured if anyone did and could reach out, it was worth asking. I also didn't want to invade anybody's DM's who already posted about their kids without their permission, so I figured that I would post one time and if anyone responds, great.
Old 01-20-22, 01:33 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Originally Posted by Obi-Wanma View Post
I haven't tried Facebook, but I did try Reddit. I'll look around at Facebook though, thanks for the idea. I'm not expecting a lot of people here to know stuff about this, but I figured if anyone did and could reach out, it was worth asking. I also didn't want to invade anybody's DM's who already posted about their kids without their permission, so I figured that I would post one time and if anyone responds, great.
I've never found Reddit all that helpful. I think you'd find more on Facebook. Even if you don't post anything, just look around the documents and pinned posts.
Old 01-20-22, 02:28 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

You said your son's doctor. Was that a pediatric endocrinologist? If not, you and your kid absolutely should see one ASAP.
Old 01-20-22, 02:41 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

It's not, its a family practice, but they specialize in trans healthcare. It's the same place that I go for my meds.
Old 01-20-22, 02:45 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

I would 100% go to a pediatric endocrinologist. You are gonna hit your max deductible by the end of the year regardless. Kids are very different than adults and will respond to these hormone-blocking medications in different ways. Ask your doctor for a referral. I don't think they would mind - they definitely shouldn't.
Old 01-20-22, 02:53 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Ok, thanks Decker, I actually hit my max out of pocket ever year because I have MS, but the copay assistance for my MS drugs basically pays for everything and I get free healthcare the rest of the year except for premiums. I don't have to take my MS medication until mid year though, and if we go with Lurpon, it's going to cause me to hit it way sooner, and without any copay assistance, so I'm going to be paying a lot more than I'm used to for the next several years, and hit in large sums at the beginning of the year before my HSA is filled, which means I'm going to have to put it on a credit card and pay interest.
Old 01-20-22, 03:10 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

Please keep me as posted as you feel comfortable on your son's medical journey. I am sure the knowledge provided will help me out with one of my patients in the future.
Old 01-20-22, 03:33 PM
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Re: So one of my kids is trans... and I think that I am too.

My child was assigned female at birth so we are more in the use of testosterone realm than using blockers. I wonder if the drug manufacturer may have any kind of coupons that can be applied? One of my diabetes meds has significant savings from something along those lines. Something that may help for next year would be to increase the health care FSA / HSA which is pretax savings on money spent toward medical care could help spread the cost over a longer time and be less of an immediate hit.

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