Other Talk "Otterville" plus Religion/Politics

How important is having friends to you?

Old 06-28-17, 12:05 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

I have a number of friends, including childhood friends of forty-five or more years' longevity. What I've learned over the years is that friendships wax and wane. I'm not married and don't have children, so in my twenties and thirties, when my childhood friends were getting coupled up and popping out kids, we were distant. The good thing about that is, there's truly no friend like an old friend. Once they got to the age that their kids weren't going everywhere with them and they weren't tied down with school events, they eventually came back. In the meantime, I had cultivated a circle whose lives were more similar to my own. If anything, a lot of those friendships sort of cooled because unlike a lot of single people, I've stayed in the same metro area my whole life--a lot of my unattached friends took advantage of their flexible circumstances to relocate. I still have almost every friend I ever made on Facebook, though. And I pride myself on the fact that only about ten percent of over 200 friends are people I only know from online. But even the online friends I've never met in person have taught me a lot and I'm grateful for it.

I think everyone needs friends, but I can relate to the people who've posted saying they are introverts. I have a very extroverted personality, but it's dependent on having lots of alone time. I live by myself by choice and need my space to stay emotionally centered. My friends and I have worked out over the years that we have to show courtesy to each other--not make unreasonable demands but not drop each other over imagined slights, too. It's a delicate balance sometimes, but that's what dealing with human beings means. If I were not willing to do that I guess I *would* be a crazy cat lady.
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Old 06-28-17, 12:54 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

Originally Posted by Vibiana View Post
I have a very extroverted personality, but it's dependent on having lots of alone time. I live by myself by choice and need my space to stay emotionally centered.
An extroverted introvert...welcome to the club!

I'm a social chameleon. I enjoy being around people, from rednecks to evangelical Christians to country club rich folk (and everything in between). I just adapt myself to their personalities.

It gets exhausting after awhile, though, and I gotta get home and sketch after a while. The wifey is comfortable just being herself...must be nice.
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Old 06-28-17, 03:06 PM
  #53  
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

It's weird for me. I'm socially awkward. It's hard for me to just make new friends from "scratch" aka just meeting new people in real life. My wife, on the other hand, can walk into a room and will very soon have tons of new friends and will have already connected on Social Media by the time she leaves the room. Though I think that tends to be typical of Females, I think she takes it to the next level. It's pretty interesting to see.

The friends I do have are long time friends and specific to a time in my life. They are also mostly female. I feel as though I actually need to connect to more Men.
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Old 06-29-17, 07:01 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

Originally Posted by Hokeyboy View Post
Now who would have thought an online forum dedicated to movie/home theater enthusiasts would attract so many loners, misfits, and introverts?


I don't think it will be the same as the 80's and early 90's where your whole life was centered around your friends and you have to adjust.

Social media makes you feel less alone even if a friend or friends likes one of your Facebook posts though it is not a deep conversation or chat.
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Old 06-29-17, 07:10 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

Online friends are best. Once they start annoying you you can just log off. Plus real life friends want to share their feelings and borrow things.
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Old 06-29-17, 07:46 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

Originally Posted by stvn1974 View Post
Online friends are best. Once they start annoying you you can just log off. Plus real life friends want to share their feelings and borrow things.
In LA they want rides to the Airport.
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Old 06-30-17, 05:39 AM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

IMO, it's more important to be a friend to others.
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Old 07-01-17, 01:30 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

Most of my friends are people I've known since childhood with a few from my 20s and 30s. Even though I enjoy hanging out with them, I sometimes go for weeks at a time without seeing them. I've never been someone who gets lonely from being alone. In many ways I prefer it. But I've realized over the years that I am lucky to be able to handle social and anti-social traits pretty much equally. It's not like I really worked at it... it's just always been that way.
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Old 07-02-17, 06:10 PM
  #59  
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

IMO, it's more important to be a friend to others.
But you don't want to be that sucker where they ask you for money and you always give it to them.
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Old 07-02-17, 06:28 PM
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Re: How important is having friends to you?

Originally Posted by JeffTheAlpaca View Post
But you don't want to be that sucker where they ask you for money and you always give it to them.
Why wouldn't you want to be a sucker? They're sugary sweet and get licked over and over.

Sure, your life is short and you get devoured like a male praying mantis, but it's a nice life while it lasts!
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