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Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

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Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Old 03-21-15, 12:35 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Sorry to hear about any and all of this happening Eddie.

She definitely needs some help and you're trying everything you can do.
Old 03-21-15, 08:18 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by broadwayblue View Post
Sorry if I missed it, but has she agreed to get help?


She told her mother she would to appease her, but she has no intention to. Right now, it seems to be all about ruining my life.

I have been there for her and my stepson for seven years, becoming his father while his has been in and out of jail. I wanted to adopt him, but his father made this impossible for me.

I have provided for my family every step of the way. Financially, emotionally, helping my son through any tough times he has had, being essentially a household maid. I have never been thanked by my wife for this. It has been abused. And my willingness to do these things for my stepson, who has called me Dad for six years, has made it easier for her to avoid responsibility.

I suppose I do not feel the desire to shower with affection a woman who has never shown me she appreciates a thing I do, even while I do everything. Because while Mom won't help, or is not present, Dad will be here, and take care of it, and them. It's my fucking job.

I don't know what I did to deserve this.

She reads too much Nicholas Sparks maybe, or watches too much Greys Anatomy, and truly believes that she should be treated like a princess, like royalty, regardless of all else.

Fuck that. My daughter is the one I will continue treating like a princess. She loves me. She respects me. She appreciates everything I do and tells me everyday that I am the best daddy in the world.

That's who my time and love gets dedicated to. Not to a woman who couldn't care less if I was around, except she would lose a maid and babysitter.
Old 03-21-15, 08:35 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

If that's the case, Eddie Money, it's time to file for divorce. This marriage is unhealthy for you and the kids.
Old 03-21-15, 08:59 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

I agree. If she's not going to address her issues and get help, I can't put the kids through this, waiting for things to magically get better.
Old 03-21-15, 09:03 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

has she been physically abusive to you or your daughter? clearly she's psychologically abusive to you... and if your daughter will corroborate the details maybe a restraining order to get her out of your household legally and inconvenience the shit out of her?

maybe a preemptive strike, because keep in mind, this day and age, even if there is no merit, if she cries wolf and claims YOU are the one being abusive somehow, you are the one who will be forced to move out, leaving your daughter home with someone who is clearly a bad influence.

getting something documented somewhere (other than otter), may be something you need to do.
Old 03-21-15, 09:42 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by RocShemp View Post
If that's the case, Eddie Money, it's time to file for divorce. This marriage is unhealthy for you and the kids.
I agree with this, before things turn real ugly.
Old 03-21-15, 12:15 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Or at least a trial separation, just so you won't have to expect anything from her. And after that, if she agrees to get help, fine, if not, you move on for good.
Old 03-21-15, 12:27 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)



Even if you don't pursue it, a VERY good idea to talk to a attorney specializing in men's rights in divorces. Not to be vindictive, but to make sure your rights as a father are protected.
Old 03-21-15, 01:23 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

I bet she did come home, didn't she.
Old 03-21-15, 02:16 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by Kurtie Dee View Post


Even if you don't pursue it, a VERY good idea to talk to a attorney specializing in men's rights in divorces. Not to be vindictive, but to make sure your rights as a father are protected.
This. If she's not willing to at least be a parent. Take that away from her. You're the parent, the only one. You need your rights and yourself to be protected in this. Damn.

Stereotypically, it's the other way around but...knowing how culture LOVES to uphold such things even when it's not the case... you need to get what really matters in all this. Those kids.
Old 03-21-15, 11:22 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

wowsers e money...i would not be able to imagine what you're going through. From a dude who's getting married soon's point of view, you are awesome.
Old 03-22-15, 05:48 AM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Yup, get a lawyer asap and get separated. That will either knock her on her ass and wake her up, or she has more time for the bar and you can burn her. Either way you're a winner.

But do not give in to her mental abuse.
Old 03-23-15, 12:10 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

I gave in this weekend. Had about a total breakdown. Had a few beers, didn't mix well with the Wellbutrin...I drove home from a friend's. Care to guess what happens next?

Rock bottom has been hit.
Old 03-23-15, 12:20 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Dui?
Old 03-23-15, 12:21 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Let it out, man. Fuck those that would give you shit, and lean on those that are here to help.

The beautiful thing about most rock bottoms is you can quit worrying about when you will reach it. Now the work begins.
Old 03-23-15, 12:21 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Run off the road? Hit a tree? Hit a parked car?

My brother did something similarly stupid going through his divorce last year. Drinking, drove home and ran off the road. It was early in the am, so he got away with 'tired' vs. DUI. Not sure if there was a police report.

Gotta keep on the straight and narrow so you can take care of those kiddos.
Old 03-23-15, 12:21 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by CRM114 View Post
Dui?
Yep. Just absolutely shameful.
Old 03-23-15, 12:22 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by Michael Corvin View Post
Run off the road? Hit a tree? Hit a parked car?

My brother did something similarly stupid going through his divorce last year. Drinking, drove home and ran off the road. It was early in the am, so he got away with 'tired' vs. DUI. Not sure if there was a police report.

Gotta keep on the straight and narrow so you can take care of those kiddos.
Ran off the road and hit a phone pole. DUI, arrested, jail, all the fun stuff.
Old 03-23-15, 12:25 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by EddieMoney View Post
Ran off the road and hit a phone pole. DUI, arrested, jail, all the fun stuff.
Well shit
Old 03-23-15, 12:30 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Damn dude. That puts a damper on claiming moral superiority in the situation. Sorry.
Old 03-23-15, 12:32 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Originally Posted by CRM114 View Post
Damn dude. That puts a damper on claiming moral superiority in the situation. Sorry.
It certainly does.
Old 03-23-15, 12:39 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

TWIST!!

well... that's just about the worst thing that could have happened.

you are in a sucky situation, made even suckier my friend.
Old 03-23-15, 12:40 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Dude, I am so so sorry for you. My son, 22, just recently had almost the exact same thing happen in Austin (depression meds mixing poorly with alcohol, running off the road, DUI, and arrest). He's back home now and we are dealing with it but I completely feel for you.
Old 03-23-15, 12:54 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

It was terrible, stupid, dangerous, selfish...yes, a lot of it was meds mixing with alcohol, but I am a grown fucking man and will accept and deal with the consequences.
Old 03-23-15, 12:59 PM
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re: Pretty sure wife wants to leave... (and she's gone)

Sucks man. Hopefully this might light a fire under your wife's ass to step things up and finally support you, OR, to just rip off the band aid. Either way, looks more likely that issues will get addressed rather than the purgatory you've been in.

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