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Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

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Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Old 10-05-14, 04:45 PM
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Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

My best friend and I usually freelance for this video production company. She detests them because of the way they treat her and how low paying their paychecks are. Let's call her "F." There is also another freelancer who sometimes work there. A likable, hard working person. I have no problem with him. He got promoted a couple of months ago, and, as a result, has gotten more paid assignments. Let's call him "S."

When I did a freelance assignment for another company, I couldn't make it the next day because of of a doctor's appointment. I had an ear infection. I asked S. if he was available and if he could replace me for the day of the appointment. He agreed. The same day I spoke to S., I got home later disappointed to see that F. sent me text messages cursing me out because I decided to ask S., and that I didn't consult with her before I did. F. told me that she doesn't want any freelancers from the company she hates. She said that if I was sick, I should have asked her girlfriend to replace me. She also said that the gig was hers (out of the four days for this job, she only showed up once). She said that if it was my job, and not a referral, I could have asked anyone to replace me, and she wouldn't have had a problem. She also threatened to never refer me again. I asked F. if she had a problem with S., she said no. It's as if S. is guilty by association. She told me that S. never got me jobs, so why should I ask him to replace me?

I profusely apologized. I told her I understood and I would never make the same mistake again.

About a week later, the second company asked me if I was available for a couple of more days, and I ended up being replaced because other more important commitments came up. A couple of days letter, I got several messages from F. saying that S. was hired, and told me not to make the same mistake again. F. didn't know I was unavailable for that shoot, I didn't see the point of telling her. I told F. that I never mentioned S to replace me, and I was replaced because of the aforementioned commitments. The person doing the hiring never mentioned S., she only said that they had a replacement. I told her this via text message, and she told me she was mad because I should have been the one with the job, not S.

Now, here are my questions: did I really do something wrong? I don't feel like I deserve all this anger just because she hates a company we both work for. Is this person being too controllable? For supposedly being her "best friend," I feel more like an enemy. If she's so angry at this company, she should stop working for them. But knowing her economic situation, I know she won't. My best friend has gotten me a lot of paying jobs, and she looks out for me a lot. I have provided a lot of support for her over the past 2 years or so. But, again, I feel like this anger towards me is unwarranted.

So what do other Otters think of my situation?
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Old 10-05-14, 04:53 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

I think you should stop texting and call. You're best friends, right?
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Old 10-05-14, 04:57 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Your best friend sounds like a c u n t.
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Old 10-05-14, 05:27 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

That's what you get for working for Del Monte. Next time take the VMS alarms job.
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Old 10-05-14, 05:30 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Business and friends (or family) do not mix well.
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Old 10-05-14, 05:31 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

So hard to follow the story. But it does seem like she's being unreasonable. You need to muddy the waters by trying to get her in the sack.
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Old 10-05-14, 06:12 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

F does not like S

You like F

You like S

----

Why did you call S instead of F?
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Old 10-05-14, 06:29 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Chicks be crazy yo.
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Old 10-05-14, 06:44 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Originally Posted by TomOpus View Post
I think you should stop texting and call. You're best friends, right?
That's how we usually communicate.

Originally Posted by Lt Ripley View Post
Your best friend sounds like a c u n t.
She isn't that bad. She's pretty much the only person helping me find jobs.

Originally Posted by Kurtie Dee View Post
So hard to follow the story. But it does seem like she's being unreasonable. You need to muddy the waters by trying to get her in the sack.
I'm not her type, I'm afraid.

Originally Posted by DVD Polizei View Post
F does not like S

You like F

You like S

----

Why did you call S instead of F?
F was working on another better paying job at the time.

I haven't spoken to her in a couple of a days. The last time we did it was over a friendly drink. I think I do want to distance myself from her, but I don't know if that's the right decision.
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Old 10-05-14, 06:51 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Originally Posted by the General View Post
I'm not her type, I'm afraid.
I can see why.

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Old 10-05-14, 06:57 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

I lost interest halfway through the OP.

Quit the drama and make it right.
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Old 10-05-14, 07:05 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

How do "more important committments" "come up" when you are working on an assignment? Sounds pretty flakey to me.
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Old 10-05-14, 07:08 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Originally Posted by DVD Josh View Post
How do "more important committments" "come up" when you are working on an assignment? Sounds pretty flakey to me.
I was asked to come in for a job interview at another company. Because I couldn't make it that week, I was replaced.
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Old 10-05-14, 07:38 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Need pics of F. with her girlfriend...or video. yeah, video.
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Old 10-05-14, 07:54 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

This thread title needs to be changed.
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Old 10-05-14, 08:09 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

So, instead of going to work and getting paid, you went to an interview. In the process of that, the fellow that replaced you got hired by the company you did not show up for?

And yeah, your "best friend" is a c u n t if you had to profusely apologize to her for not handing it to "her friend".

S seems like the smart one in all of this. He takes the work when it is available and gets hired.

More like an E-1.
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Old 10-05-14, 08:18 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Originally Posted by the General View Post
I was asked to come in for a job interview at another company. Because I couldn't make it that week, I was replaced.
Yeah, I'd take S in a heartbeat over the both of you.
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Old 10-05-14, 08:21 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

I can see why. I understand I made a mistake.
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Old 10-05-14, 10:15 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Are you sure you don't want to "F" the "S" out of her? You're just friends right?
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Old 10-05-14, 10:17 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

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Old 10-05-14, 10:32 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

I wouldn't keep someone around who was causing unnecessary drama for me at work, even if she was helping me get the work. Who needs that shit?
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Old 10-05-14, 10:47 PM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Originally Posted by VinVega View Post
Are you sure you don't want to "F" the "S" out of her? You're just friends right?
I'd "C" on her "T"s, then "P" in her "B," but I'm a bastard.
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Old 10-06-14, 07:54 AM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Originally Posted by Troy Stiffler View Post
I lost interest halfway through the OP.

Quit the drama and make it right.
How bout you just call her when you can't make the jobs? For someone who is supposed to be a "best" friend you made this way to complicated.
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Old 10-06-14, 07:56 AM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

C U Next Tuesday
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Old 10-06-14, 08:03 AM
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Re: Did I screw over my best friend or is she too controlling? (Long post.)

Was she your friend BEFORE she was your colleague? Business relationships can often seriously undermine existing friendships. If she wasn't your friend first, then you made a mistake becoming her friend after you started working on jobs together. You should have just kept it professional. The details of your disagreements really don't matter much, she's simply being unprofessional here and thinks she can get away with it because of your friendship.
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