Supermallet

Because you can't see how your posts come off to anyone else. So you seem to lack any awareness of how you're interacting with the world.

Norm de Plume

I'm not in the medical field, so I'm sure someone else here is better qualified to answer, but, to my understanding, the answer is a resounding yes. That's why many/most people with Asperger's find themselves marginalized and/or bullied. They just can't play well with others.

Remember the kid in this cringe-inducing video from a few years ago? He almost certainly has Asperger's. Notice how rude he is, completely without self-awareness.

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/gRZNQ06kWyc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

moviefan2k4

I know my statements anger some people, but since I'm not being malicious, its not my fault. If I were hurling insults or cussing up a storm, things would be different. I don't concern myself with others' reactions very much, because I can't control them anyway.

Numanoid

You should do real well in therapy with that attitude.

Hint: Accepting that you have a problem is the first step in dealing with it.

Bonus hint: Stop obsessing over cussing. People cuss. They're just words. Stop assigning them more weight than they deserve.

Alan Smithee

A lot of the younger people at my group talk like that kid. I like to think I come across a little better than that, but I've gotten the "geez, this guy is weird" vibe sometimes when talking to random people so I don't know. I know one guy who took public speaking and he shows NO signs of social awkwardness, yet he swears he's been diagnosed.

I often have trouble taking in words, and sometimes stumble on them myself- I remember losing a spelling bee in 6th grade because I said a completely different letter than the one I was thinking. Nowadays, especially if it's in a loud crowded place, I'll cup my ears to hear who I'm talking to better, looking like a deaf person. Ever since I got access to closed captions, I've found that I can usually understand a movie a lot better when reading them, yet I don't use them the first time I watch a movie since they intrude on the picture, and when they're turned on I find myself looking at the words instead of the picture. Even if I watch a movie that isn't in English, I prefer to watch it first without subtitles and then with them on if I don't get what's going on. I have a general obsessiveness about the way I watch stuff too, which I've detailed here before resulting in many "WTF?" reactions.

solipsta

I see you've gone with the "difference to be defended" option. It's a lonely path, my friend. You speak of being abused and hurt and rejected by others and then when you see an explanation of what your part may have been (and no, this isn't victim blaming...every victim plays a part), you use it as simply understanding why others treat you like this, rather than using it as a tool to move toward what you say you want. Fun.

Ah, the paths we choose...

moviefan2k4

I'm not completely sure which option holds the most weight yet, to be honest. My last post wasn't in reference to my Asperger's diagnosis, but the questions about political correctness which Supermallet was posting.

The plain and simple fact is that if you're not being deliberately hurtful toward somebody, their responses are neither your responsibility nor fault. That's not a license to avoid caring about others at all, but obsessively avoiding ideological conflict is the key to the PC mindset. This kind of thinking led to people wrongfully misinterpreting the Constitution with events like the 1930s Hollywood blacklist, and more broadly, the "separation of church and state" mantra. There's no law in any founding U.S. document, which says any belief system can't have influence in the federal government, or has to be kept completely away from it. The First Amendment was designed to keep the government from making any religion mandatory in observance, or punishable for failure to comply...that's it.

Matt

If I bought you a new shirt, would you wear it?

moviefan2k4

I actually have four identical white T-shirts, which I wear because they're comfortable. I've never cared much for "popular fashion" as a whole.

auto

taffer

Its not about fashion. Its about looking like you don't wear the same shirt every single day.

I don't give a crap about fashion either. I wear solid color t-shirts 99.9% of the time too, but at least I mix it up with a few blues, a few reds, a few greens, etc.

You do wear different hats in the videos, which makes it even more odd with different hats but all the same shirts.

DirkUSA

I have to agree with supermallet.

moviefan2k4

I don't give much thought to trivial things like that; if its comfortable and clean, I wear it.

Variety's never been my strong suit. I wore either blue or black jeans in all types of weather until about 3 years ago, when I switched to khakis.

moviefan2k4

Its not that I don't understand how some people react to what I say, but more that unless I'm being malicious, I honestly don't care. I'm not out to deliberately hurt or offend anybody, but I also tell things as they are, without apology. Arbitrary reactions aren't my responsibility.

DirkUSA

But you care when people respond the same way you talk to them and you don't like it.

You need to look at things from more than one angle.

CRM114

Is it a requirement that everyone agree with these diagnoses? Why is someone a dick who thinks this Aspergers and ADHD are wildly over-diagnosed?

solipsta

It wasn't intended to be, but it was. You just haven't quite realized its all part of the same animal.

CRM114

You see, these murky "diagnoses" are dangerous. Now the OP has a medical excuse for being politically incorrect (otherwise known as a social ass).

Our problems are our own to work out. We all have periods where we feel alone or awkward or attacked. People need to take steps to change themselves. That's what successful adults do. I think parents can really help their little ones too by getting them into social situations and places to gain self confidence, like children's theater. And please, teach your children the basic alphabet, numbers, and colors before kindergarten. Preschool is an awesome idea too.

Sorry, call me a skeptic.

EddieMoney

I don't get the thread title. "Party of me." ?

WallyOPD

Not attempting to have any awareness of the effect your words may have on others is being malicious and deliberately hurtful. And dismissing people's natural responses as "arbitrary" and thus not your responsibility is a very immature reaction.

OldBoy

he's a dick for calling it Assburgers.

CRM114

This here is the KEY to normal social functionality. You need to defeat this attitude.

Appearance is pretty important also when it comes to social acceptance. I'd say lose 20 lbs, go to Banana Republic or something and buy a good pair of jeans and some nice shirts, get some updated eyewear, lose the Jesus stuff, and smoke some weed. This is an unscientific opinion of course.

CRM114

Dude, its the trivial stuff that make the difference. You either want to change or you don't. Wearing nice clothes makes you feel good about yourself and then you project that confidence. It's all baby steps but I seriously would not discount just trying some self improvement.

Supermallet

Is this the same Constitution that left marriage rights up to the States? Still waiting to see those lines of text produced.

Groucho

Advising somebody to wear nice clothes and then sending them to Banana Republic seems like conflicting advice to me.