NORML54601

Just like the topic says. I can grow a goatee, but the hair on my cheeks is pretty sporadic til it hits my hairline. Right now I'm rocking a porn stache with a goatee and a soul patch, but I'd like to be able to really grow it all out. Any advice Otter?

tommyp007

I couldn't grow a good beard if I was chained to a dungeon wall. I think some men have the genes, some don't.

Jules Winfield

Try rubbing Chia Pet seeds all over your face. If that doesn't work and you grow a plant beard instead, please, please, please let me grow some tomatoes on your garden beard.

X

Feed her a lot.

Minor Threat

I highly suggest 1000w HPS+MH Cool Tube Reflector Digital Ballast Grow Lighting, but LED has become quite popular in recent

Wait, what....?

bcd

All you need is a good slap apparently...

Jules Winfield

I don't mean to derail the serious responses this thread has gotten and will get but holy shit, X! You joined DVDTalk in 1987? That's probably before Geoff K. joined.

wishbone

Do you have a beard trimmer? You might be able to trim it to a certain length and over the course of time have your beard "fill-in."

If your hair is patchy then there is probably not a lot that you can do.

Minor Threat

The join date directly correlates when ASS+++ coding was pushed into the production environment.....

schizopak

I don't think DVDs were even invented in 1987 let alone the consumer use of the internet.

Jules Winfield

I didn't even bother looking under the join date. Just saw the join date and it threw me off. I assumed it was when X lost his virginity or something. I don't even know how old X is. He could be 13 for all I know.

Troy Stiffler

Focus. Really really hard.

Mine was thicker before I got fat [again]. I think that it has something to do with surface area on your face (like the distance between pores or something).

majorjoe23

Shave more.

edstein

Save Ferris

Eat lots of ice cream and thick soups and let it get caught in your beard. Try to eat ice creams and soups that are already the same color of your hair.

kgrogers1979

You mean you didn't have the DVD add-on for your NES? All the cool kids had it. It was more bad than the Power Glove.

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Heat

Use a merkin on your face.

Mole177

just concentrate REAL hard.

warning, weird sound at the end.

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Kittydreamer

You're probably lacking some minerals and essential fatty acids. Try a multi-vitamin and some omega3 fatty acid. Also, scrub your skin and brush your beard daily to stimulate the hair. I'm currently trying to grow out my hair (on my head) and this is what the ND has me doing. Good luck

GMan2819

Lots of masturbating. No wait...that's for hairy palms.

How about using Minoxidil on your face? Some people reported varying degrees of success

Sonic

I can tell you that Minoxidil does work, but other areas too will grow hair so becareful.

Shave your balls, get some Elmer's glue and put a thin layer on the areas you want to thicken.

I can post pictures in great detail if you like. I've done it before.

Nick Danger

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DVD Polizei

Actually, try trimming it (or whatever you got) every 3-4 days, but not completely.

Nick Danger

It's not going to happen. Either you have hair on your cheeks, or you don't.

DirkUSA

Let it grow for a couple of weeks and then just use black spray paint.