Go Back  DVD Talk Forum > General Discussions > Other Talk
Reload this Page >

YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Other Talk "Otterville"

YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Old 03-16-12, 07:06 PM
  #1  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
Thread Starter
 
Vipper II's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Abingdon, MD
Posts: 3,397
Received 46 Likes on 37 Posts
YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

So, I've been out with this girl 3 times so far and we have excellent chemistry, great conversation, and we apparently really enjoy each other's company. Up until now we've done one date per week; however, in order to decide whether I ultimately want to pee in her butt, I'd kind of like to kick it up a notch. With that stated, how does one go about attempting to increase the dating frequency without coming off as clingy/high-maintenance? I figured it's best to simply keep it casual, like perhaps suggesting that we meet for drinks sometime during the week, but my confidence isn't currently at its highest and I don't want to kill the whole thing by saying something stoopid. Am I on the right track? Should I just suck it up and trust my instincts? Is peeing in someone's butt worth the effort?
Old 03-16-12, 07:09 PM
  #2  
TGM
DVD Talk Legend
 
TGM's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 16,553
Received 251 Likes on 158 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

take it easy big boy. by my math you've only known her three weeks.
Old 03-16-12, 07:15 PM
  #3  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Mrs. Danger's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: With Nick Danger
Posts: 19,192
Received 557 Likes on 317 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Go out more.
Old 03-16-12, 07:19 PM
  #4  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: NY
Posts: 3,546
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by TallGuyMe View Post
take it easy big boy. by my math you've only known her three weeks.
You might be on to something there.......
Old 03-16-12, 07:24 PM
  #5  
DVD Talk Hero
 
TomOpus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Kansas City, MO
Posts: 37,224
Received 700 Likes on 506 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by Vipper II View Post
So, I've been out with this girl 3 times so far and we have excellent chemistry, great conversation, and we apparently really enjoy each other's company. Up until now we've done one date per week;
Great, sounds good so far...

Originally Posted by Vipper II View Post
however
Uh oh....

Originally Posted by Vipper II View Post
I'd kind of like to kick it up a notch.
Why fuck up something that is going so well? What would YOU think if she wanted to see you more often... like every other day? Yeah, you'd think she's desperate, clingy and wants to get married really fast. You'd be out of there so fast.

This is not a race. Enjoy the time you spend with her and don't be in such a hurry.
Old 03-16-12, 07:25 PM
  #6  
DVD Talk Legend
 
bunkaroo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Chicago West Suburbs
Posts: 16,082
Received 105 Likes on 70 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

So three dates....have you consummated the acquaintance yet?

If so, you're probably close to being able to see her more than once a week. If not, well, take care of that, then work on seeing her more than once a week.
Old 03-16-12, 07:28 PM
  #7  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 11,986
Received 49 Likes on 39 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Don't listen to these fools op. First date i went on with my ex-gf i met her mom. second date we changed our FB status, and by the third we were in serious discussions about marriage, kids. It all worked out fine.
Old 03-16-12, 07:34 PM
  #8  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
Thread Starter
 
Vipper II's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Abingdon, MD
Posts: 3,397
Received 46 Likes on 37 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by TomOpus View Post
Why fuck up something that is going so well? What would YOU think if she wanted to see you more often... like every other day? Yeah, you'd think she's desperate, clingy and wants to get married really fast. You'd be out of there so fast.
I'm not talking about an every other day type of thing, though, but rather a second, more "casual" meeting mid-week. We talk on the phone at least once a week and exchange a couple of emails, so what's wrong with replacing that with getting together for drinks for an hour or two, especially since it's so obvious we like hanging out with each other? I know it's still way too soon for something more intense.

The whole "pee in the butt" thing was just something I added as I knew some wise ass would bring it up at some point .

Last edited by Vipper II; 03-16-12 at 07:39 PM.
Old 03-16-12, 07:38 PM
  #9  
DVD Talk Hero
 
TomOpus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Kansas City, MO
Posts: 37,224
Received 700 Likes on 506 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

I would wait and see how it goes before you up the ante. Once a week might be perfect for her. She might work hard during the week and might not have the time or inclination to want to go out after work. My fiancee and I dated around once a month or so. Of course she lived halfway across the country but we made it work because we wanted to.

At this point I think quality over quantity is the key.
Old 03-16-12, 07:39 PM
  #10  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: La Crosse, WI
Posts: 15,553
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like on 1 Post
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by Vipper II View Post
I'm not talking about an every other day type of thing, though, but rather a second, more "casual" meeting mid-week. We talk on the phone at least once a week and exchange a couple of emails, so what's wrong with replacing that with getting together for drinks for an hour or two, especially since it's so obvious we like hanging out with each other? I know it's still way too soon for something more intense.

The whole "pee in the butt" thing was just something I added as I knew some wise ass would make a comment about it .
You don't actually want to pee in her butt? I'm afraid we're going to have to ax you to leave.
Old 03-16-12, 07:46 PM
  #11  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
Thread Starter
 
Vipper II's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Abingdon, MD
Posts: 3,397
Received 46 Likes on 37 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by TomOpus View Post
At this point I think quality over quantity is the key.
Very good point. I think my biggest concern is that I'm not the only one in the fold, and that she'll end up going for this other person (provided there even is one) over me if I don't get farther into it a little sooner. Concerns of that nature are a big part of dating, true, but it's been quite a while since I've connected with someone this well so it's difficult to exercise the patience, and I have reduced patience to begin with.
Old 03-16-12, 07:58 PM
  #12  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Goat3001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: NYC
Posts: 17,116
Received 23 Likes on 11 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

I see nothing wrong with asking her out mid week, but wait another date. She might want to see you more too, but wants you to pull the trigger on that. After your 4th date, casually ask her in an email if she wants to grab drinks after work mid week. Not a full blown date, just a mini date. Then you can make a play for another date during the weekend.
Old 03-16-12, 08:01 PM
  #13  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Shannon Nutt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 17,902
Received 183 Likes on 147 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Kidnapping is always an option.
Old 03-16-12, 08:05 PM
  #14  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
Thread Starter
 
Vipper II's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Abingdon, MD
Posts: 3,397
Received 46 Likes on 37 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by Shannon Nutt View Post
Kidnapping is always an option.
I had considered that, but I don't have enough rope to tie her down in my cavernous trunk, and I wouldn't want her to roll around and potentially injure herself.
Old 03-16-12, 08:10 PM
  #15  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: United States
Posts: 876
Likes: 0
Received 2 Likes on 2 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

One of my friends (a female) went out on a few dates with her boyfriend and it really went well, so he asked her if she would stop seeing any other guys if she was at that time (basically, be exclusive) and she did (if she was). She's a normal girl that most guys find very attractive, so if she wasn't weirded out by that and thought the question was okay, maybe you should propose the same to this girl if you are concerned she's with other guys?
Old 03-16-12, 08:35 PM
  #16  
DVD Talk Godfather
 
The Bus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 54,913
Received 19 Likes on 14 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?



I've only dated people were that issue/question didn't even come up. But I don't know how it is today with plentyofbabelfish and whatever else happens on the interbrains.
Old 03-16-12, 08:44 PM
  #17  
DVD Talk Hero
 
Nick Danger's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Albuquerque
Posts: 27,661
Received 830 Likes on 549 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by TallGuyMe View Post
take it easy big boy. by my math you've only known her three weeks.
By my math it's been two weeks.

A date on March 1, March 8, and March 15. Two weeks.
Old 03-16-12, 08:49 PM
  #18  
DVD Talk Legend
 
FantasticVSDoom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: No longer trapped
Posts: 11,610
Likes: 0
Received 3 Likes on 3 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Im hoping at least 3rd date 3rd base, preferably home run... If not, step up to the plate already. And yeah if you want to see her more, just ask.
Old 03-16-12, 08:50 PM
  #19  
Moderator
 
Join Date: May 2000
Location: In mourning
Posts: 27,386
Received 159 Likes on 110 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Granted it's been a very long time since I had a date, but am I missing something here? Don't you just tell her that you enjoy spending time with her and want to see her a little more often? In what world does that not work?
Old 03-16-12, 08:52 PM
  #20  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
 
Abelkems's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: NW GA
Posts: 2,785
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by The Bus View Post


I've only dated people were that issue/question didn't even come up.
This is pretty much my experience too. When the chemistry was there, she turns into a stray cat and just starts showing up at the doorstep all the time. With my current wife, the change came when I invited her over for dinner and cooked her a nice meal. We haven't been one day without seeing each other since.
Old 03-16-12, 09:24 PM
  #21  
DVD Talk Godfather
 
DVD Polizei's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 53,740
Received 152 Likes on 112 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by Vipper II View Post
So, I've been out with this girl 3 times so far and we have excellent chemistry, great conversation, and we apparently really enjoy each other's company.
1) Are you sure she is aware this is a dating thing.

2) If she enjoys your company...she'll be wanting to do things with you more and will be communicating this with you.

3) When #2 happens, you won't even need to kick things up a notch.

So, make sure you're on the same level as she is.
Old 03-16-12, 11:45 PM
  #22  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: MA
Posts: 17,003
Likes: 0
Received 2 Likes on 2 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Like others have said, when a girl really wants to pursue something with a guy, they will be the one initiating plans. She's probably still in the 'not sure yet' stage.
Old 03-16-12, 11:53 PM
  #23  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Cardsfan111's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Indiana
Posts: 18,073
Likes: 0
Received 176 Likes on 131 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Originally Posted by Shannon Nutt View Post
Kidnapping is always an option.
Obviously, it would be wise to first hire someone else to attempt a kidnapping to see how she might respond to it.
Old 03-16-12, 11:57 PM
  #24  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Sonic's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 1999
Posts: 19,028
Received 230 Likes on 177 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Wear snug Chino pants on your next date showing some "unaware buldge".

j/k

I agree with Rockmjd23
Old 03-17-12, 03:16 AM
  #25  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 871
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: YADT: How does one increase dating frequency?

Ditch this girl and find someone who wants what you want.

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright 2021 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.