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YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

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YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Old 11-02-11, 10:15 AM
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YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

This story is a little involved, but bear with me.

I had a friend of mine die about a month ago. He, before his death, lost his own father, so he more or less gave up. My father and I were close with him and we knew the family very well.

Up until that point, I had only met his on sister...not the other.

Long story short, his sister came on to me at wake. Initially I was uncomfortable with it, given the event, but she was interested in me.

Jump forward a couple of days, I find out she is on a cruise and won't be back for two weeks. I have no means of communicating with her at this point. On a whim, her sister tells me to friend her on Facebook and take it from there.

I do that. She accept the request and nothing happens for a week. I sent her a birthday wish last week (the 25th) and I got a personal thank you back.

Naturally, I found that to be interesting. I decide to send a message through Facebook to her and I get a response back...I talk to her for a bit, but I get pulled into a meeting. I sent her my number and that is how I left it.

Now I have an interesting dilemma. I have her number, which was out on Facebook, but I know I can't use it. How do I see if this girl is still interested in me, without coming off as a creep?

I am open to any and all suggestions at this point. Also I am fully aware of how ridiculous the whole Facebook angle is...but as I said, it is my only line of communication.
Old 11-02-11, 10:19 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Just message her again.
Old 11-02-11, 10:21 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

The Facebook angle isn't weird. I've got a few dates after friending someone I recently met and messaging her. That's just the way things work these days.

Anyway, just message her again.
Old 11-02-11, 10:21 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Personally, I would just take a step back now and let her make the next move. You've established that you're interested in her, and she expressed interest in you. If she is going through all of these deaths in the family, you're not going to want to jump in at the wrong time and create hours of entertaining Otter Talk stories for the rest of us.
Old 11-02-11, 10:22 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

If a girl is interested in you she will let you know. You rarely have to "figure out" if she likes you.

How not to look like a creep? Imagine there is some homely, desperate woman hounding you with phone calls and emails and personal visits trying to get you to take her out on a date - now don't do any of things she does.
Old 11-02-11, 10:27 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Pics?

Also, never contact her more than twice the amount of times she's contacted you. So far she's only responded.

I'd say give it one more shot. If she's busy, it's a no.
Old 11-02-11, 10:33 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Log off of the computer, call 1-800-FLOWERS, and order 500 bouquets of a dozen long-stemmed red roses to be waiting for her at her apartment when she returns from her cruise. Then, find out where the cruise ship is docking and be waiting at the pier with another bouquet, an engagement ring, and a marriage license application. It would be best if you were standing right in front of the gangway when the ship docks, so that she can't slip past you when she comes off. Oh, and hold a big sign that says MY SOUL IS FUSED WITH YOURS FOREVER _________ (insert her name).


























Old 11-02-11, 10:35 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

What happened to text'ing

"can I tap that?"
or
"So when can I tap that?"

I thought people were having good success in the digital age with being straight forward and not playing all these stupid little high school games
Old 11-02-11, 10:39 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

She probably wanted crazy grief sex at the funeral. I think you've missed your chance.

Unless the other sister dies.
Old 11-02-11, 10:50 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by Vibiana View Post
Oh, and hold a big sign that says MY SOUL IS FUSED WITH YOURS FOREVER _________ (insert her name).
Make sure this is on a whiteboard, and that you have a copy of the passenger manifest. That way if Vibiana's suggestion doesn't work for some reason, you can reuse it with another girl getting off the boat.
Old 11-02-11, 10:51 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Being a creep would involve pussyfooting around and figuring out the "right" way to do things. Just be direct and ask her if she wants to share a root beer float at the malt shop.
Old 11-02-11, 10:57 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

I just read through all of these...and it doesn't address the, what I see as, the elephant in the room. I have her number, which was not given to me. Do I use that?

Additionally, a good friend of mine said, I should not message her again, since I sent two messages already that went into long chats.

As I said, I know she *was* interested, I am not sure if she still is.
Old 11-02-11, 11:01 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by macnorton View Post
I just read through all of these...and it doesn't address the, what I see as, the elephant in the room. I have her number, which was not given to me. Do I use that?
I vote no. If she's interested, she can make the next move.
Old 11-02-11, 11:05 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

You might just ask her.
Old 11-02-11, 11:07 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

The best way to meet her again would be at her sisters wake or funeral. Just an idea.
Old 11-02-11, 11:11 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by Mrs. Danger View Post
You might just ask her.
That was my take and everyone of my friend talked me out of it saying I would be insane to do it.

The other thing is, this girl is older than me (I am 29 she is 32)...my thought was, I could act like an adult.

if you can't tell, I am horrible at this. If you told me to stand in front of a thousand corporate big wigs and give a speech, I am fine. Tell me to get a beautiful woman to go out with me...and the cookie crumbles.
Old 11-02-11, 11:18 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

You gotta get yourself some new friends. Just ask her how she feels about you. It'll be good practice for you.
Old 11-02-11, 11:21 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by Mrs. Danger View Post
You gotta get yourself some new friends. Just ask her how she feels about you. It'll be good practice for you.
I have been seriously considering that. Most of my friends are younger than me (between 1-4 years) and they have their world and I have mine.

My one friend last night, berated me on this subject. He clouded my judgment. My gut told me right away I should be direct and if there is nothing there move on. But he and my other friends talked me out of it and said I would be creepy, shady, stalker or any other adjective you can think of. To me it just didn't make any sense. This girl was into me from the get go, why would I not ask her?

Now my other issue is, how to say it.
Old 11-02-11, 11:25 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

I met my fiancee on Facebook and it all started because I needed someone to help with an online game. After some time she sent me a message saying "Hi and thanks for the help." I replied with a friendly "you're welcome" and we went back and forth for about a month.

At that point I said to her "I enjoy talking to you and how would feel if we talked on the phone?"

She agreed and gave me her number and, as they say, the rest is history.
Old 11-02-11, 11:26 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Text her. Tell her you're chillin' like a villain.

SHE WILL BE YOURS.
Old 11-02-11, 11:32 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by TomOpus View Post
I met my fiancee on Facebook and it all started because I needed someone to help with an online game. After some time she sent me a message saying "Hi and thanks for the help." I replied with a friendly "you're welcome" and we went back and forth for about a month.

At that point I said to her "I enjoy talking to you and how would feel if we talked on the phone?"

She agreed and gave me her number and, as they say, the rest is history.
This. I said that to my friend and he looked at me like I was nuts. Granted, no two women are the same, but that was my gut instinct.

Fuck my friends, I am going with my gut. But I am going to give it a day, I don't want to look too desperate.
Old 11-02-11, 11:33 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Just read the mhg83 thread and do the exact opposite of everything he's done. Worst case scenario, you end up not sucking dick.
Old 11-02-11, 11:36 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by macnorton View Post
This. I said that to my friend and he looked at me like I was nuts. Granted, no two women are the same, but that was my gut instinct.

Fuck my friends, I am going with my gut. But I am going to give it a day, I don't want to look too desperate.
Sometimes you just gotta take the leap. In my case she lived halfway across the country so it wasn't as if we'd ever bump into each other.

Good luck!
Old 11-02-11, 11:38 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by Meglos View Post
Text her. Tell her you're chillin' like a villain.

HE WILL BE YOURS.
Fixed!
Old 11-02-11, 11:40 AM
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Re: YADT: How can I tell if this girl is still into me?

Originally Posted by macnorton View Post
Fuck my friends, I am going with my gut. But I am going to give it a day, I don't want to look too desperate.
Have you ever gone fishing? Ever had a nibble on the line, but the fish didn't take it? Have you ever then reeled in the line, only to cast it again and again in the same spot? Never works.

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