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More Stupid Office Sayings

Old 11-05-08, 01:34 PM
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More Stupid Office Sayings

So, right before lunch, the guy who thinks he is my boss (but is not) came in and told me I missed his mandatory meeting.

First, these meetings accomplish nothing, and only serve to boost his ego in "running" a meeting.

Second, I told him I was busy working, in the cleanroom, on a project with a deadline approaching. I mean ungowning and going to the conference room for a 20 minute meeting, and regowning and resuming work would be a HUGE waste of time.

Anyhow, I told him I was busy working and he said:
"The weekly meeting is the rock in the river which the work flows around"

First, that is just dumb. Second, his description says that his meetings are a disturbance in the flow of work!

He then proceeds to tell another employee that I "got on my high horse" when I told him I would no longer do any work on Wednesday morning in order to ensure I was available for his meeting.

High horse? WTF, I could see being called sarcastic, or a smart ass, but high horse?
Old 11-05-08, 01:37 PM
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Just tell him you had to get a high horse so that you could get over that huge rock he put in the river of your work. He should be able to understand that.
Old 11-05-08, 01:40 PM
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Originally Posted by jonw9 View Post
"He was the rock in the river which the work flows around"
I absolutely need that on my tombstone.
Old 11-05-08, 01:40 PM
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"I'll attend your meetings on a going forward basis, contingent upon the flow of actualization in the production arena."

(I'll go to your meetings when I'm not busy)
Old 11-05-08, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Shoveler View Post
Just tell him you had to get a high horse so that you could get over that huge rock he put in the river of your work. He should be able to understand that.
Or, since he isn't your boss, you could tell him to go fuck himself.
Old 11-05-08, 01:45 PM
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Originally Posted by jonw9 View Post
the guy who thinks he is my boss (but is not)
This has an easy solution, email your real boss and ask his permission to skip the meeting. Once in writing, show it to the guy who thinks he is your boss and move on.
Old 11-05-08, 01:46 PM
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I'm sensing an impending paradigm shift in your organizational matrix.
Old 11-05-08, 01:53 PM
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Originally Posted by 4KRG View Post
This has an easy solution, email your real boss and ask his permission to skip the meeting. Once in writing, show it to the guy who thinks he is your boss and move on.
I was working with my boss at the time of missing his meeting, thus my boss also was not in attendance.

We have been joking about it since, and will probably make "rock" references for the rest of the week!

My boss is the kind of person that will ignore the other guy, and let him think he is in charge. I am the kind of person that will continually remind the other guy that he isn't my boss.
Old 11-05-08, 01:58 PM
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Originally Posted by jonw9 View Post
I was working with my boss at the time of missing his meeting, thus my boss also was not in attendance.

We have been joking about it since, and will probably make "rock" references for the rest of the week!

My boss is the kind of person that will ignore the other guy, and let him think he is in charge. I am the kind of person that will continually remind the other guy that he isn't my boss.
Sounds like you should be good on this. I would just fuck with the fake boss then.
Old 11-05-08, 02:02 PM
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The not-boss sounds like a theorist.
Old 11-05-08, 02:03 PM
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Nope, engineer.
Old 11-05-08, 02:05 PM
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Originally Posted by jonw9 View Post
We have been joking about it since, and will probably make "rock" references for the rest of the week!
What I would do is place a huge boulder in the doorway of his office/cubicle with a sign "Work around this!"
Old 11-05-08, 02:05 PM
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But when the rubber hits the road, it's strictly a 40,000 foot view.
Grab the low-hanging fruit while strengthening your core values.

Otherwise, that dog won't hunt.
Old 11-05-08, 02:33 PM
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Originally Posted by jonw9 View Post
Nope, engineer.
Not surprising, unless he's a nuclear engineer.
Old 11-05-08, 02:35 PM
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one time i was in the oiifce and i was like hnad me the spetlar jerry! and everyone was like lol
Old 11-05-08, 02:35 PM
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Next time he confronts you, just laugh in his face.
Old 11-05-08, 02:39 PM
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Tell him to get the hell outta your Oiifce!
Old 11-05-08, 02:40 PM
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Never Oiifce. It makes an Oi out of I and fce.
Old 11-05-08, 02:42 PM
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I had a stupid oiifce once. But after some outpatient surgery, I was much better.
Old 11-05-08, 02:45 PM
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is there an org chart at your work?
Old 11-05-08, 02:46 PM
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So his description of his morning meeting is a pretty good analogy!

A rock in the middle of a stream makes noise, endangers useful navigation, and accomplishes nothing. It just sits there, and everyone who wants to make progress has to figure out how to avoid it. Removing it from the riverbed benefits everyone.
Old 11-05-08, 02:54 PM
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The next time he makes a stupid metaphor about the weekly meeting, give him a full disagilation.
Old 11-05-08, 02:55 PM
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Next time you miss his meeting, right afterwords send him an IM that says "I accidentally your meeting."
Old 11-05-08, 02:56 PM
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OMG. I didn't know Dwight Shrute works with you!
Old 11-05-08, 02:58 PM
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Originally Posted by 4KRG View Post
This has an easy solution, email your real boss and ask his permission to skip the meeting. Once in writing, show it to the guy who thinks he is your boss and move on.
I would not do this. It confirms to the self-important primadonna that you need permission to miss his meeting. Telling him that you had more important things to do at the time should suffice.

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