Go Back  DVD Talk Forum > General Discussions > Other Talk
Reload this Page >

Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Other Talk "Otterville"

Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Old 01-16-10, 09:02 PM
  #151  
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: looking for mangos in the jungle
Posts: 4,064
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Graftenberg View Post

Well he walks away to work his product and she opens the door to let me out and as I leave she says something like I'm too busy enjoying being single or something close to it. I would have thought that she would be talking to the other vendor but he had already walked away and their wasn't anybody else around for her to say that to but me.

So what the fuck was that? It just doesn't make any sense to me at all.
Could just be a smart ass comment in response to the other guy. She's probably just being friendly. Or maybe she lied about the "boyfriend" before and forgot about the lie and just busted herself. From what I've read in this thread, she knows you're interested, she had her opportunity. Don't read into it.

Last edited by monkeyboy; 01-16-10 at 09:06 PM.
Old 01-17-10, 11:10 AM
  #152  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
Thread Starter
 
Graftenberg's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: sector 2814
Posts: 2,022
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Well I asked a friend of mine about it also and this is the advice she gave me:

Shes single and wants to mingle?? Idk, let her make the first move, you dont want to freak her out and move too fast.
Really at this point there is nothing that I should do, she knows where I stand.
Old 01-17-10, 01:45 PM
  #153  
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: looking for mangos in the jungle
Posts: 4,064
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Graftenberg View Post
Well I asked a friend of mine about it also and this is the advice she gave me:
Really at this point there is nothing that I should do, she knows where I stand.
Just flirt with her. Nothing wrong with that. What was your response to her when she made the "being single and having fun" comment?
Old 01-17-10, 02:33 PM
  #154  
DVD Talk Legend
 
DeputyDave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 14,080
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like on 1 Post
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by monkeyboy View Post
Just flirt with her. Nothing wrong with that. What was your response to her when she made the "being single and having fun" comment?
Old 01-17-10, 03:27 PM
  #155  
Banned by request
 
Supermallet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Termite Terrace
Posts: 54,150
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Deer from beyond the depths of space?
Old 01-17-10, 04:08 PM
  #156  
DVD Talk Hero
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Words
Posts: 28,204
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by PopcornTreeCt View Post
Although, in my experience it seems women want sex more than they lead on. I haven't seen the 'friends' thing often.
The problem with the "ladder" system is that it does not account for friends who enjoy having sex together, but have no interest in dating. There should be a catwalk of sorts connecting the two, but only one or two people can fit on it at a time.

Last edited by NotThatGuy; 01-17-10 at 04:13 PM.
Old 01-17-10, 04:26 PM
  #157  
Banned by request
 
Supermallet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Termite Terrace
Posts: 54,150
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

I would say a tightrope is probably a better analogy for that than a catwalk.
Old 01-17-10, 07:54 PM
  #158  
DVD Talk Special Edition
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 1,691
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by DeputyDave View Post
Old 01-18-10, 12:59 PM
  #159  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
Thread Starter
 
Graftenberg's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: sector 2814
Posts: 2,022
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by monkeyboy View Post
Just flirt with her. Nothing wrong with that. What was your response to her when she made the "being single and having fun" comment?
I had just walked past her so she said it to my back which is why I'm not sure excatly what she said. I then just kept on walking.
Old 01-18-10, 06:25 PM
  #160  
Admin
 
VinVega's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Herding cats
Posts: 34,939
Received 345 Likes on 221 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Graftenberg View Post
I had just walked past her so she said it to my back which is why I'm not sure excatly what she said. I then just kept on walking.
I bolded the important part of the story. Focus on this and keep doing it with this chick...please.
Old 01-24-10, 07:00 AM
  #161  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
Thread Starter
 
Graftenberg's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: sector 2814
Posts: 2,022
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Well last week nothing happened, she was at her desk on her computer and there were other employees around but it did remind me of something that happened before.

It was maybe two or three months ago and she was sitting down in front of the computer. I had my back to her dropping off and picking up product when I heard her chair moving. I looked over my shoulder to see her chair about five feet from where she was, I turned back around without looking over at her. I thought it was really fucking strange at the time that she would just kick or push her chair like that which is why I still recall it happening. I don't think that anyone else was around at the time.
Old 01-24-10, 12:16 PM
  #162  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 3,623
Received 9 Likes on 7 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Rockmjd23 View Post
Things don't fall through when girls are interested.
Meaning yes.

Meaning she is still sleeping with her ex.

Meaning back off.
Bad move.

Too late.

But seriously, good luck!
Agree with everything above (except sleeping with her ex which may or may not be true)

EDIT: read through this entertaining and illuminating thread. So she WAS boning her ex.

OP: Are you still in touch with original girl ?

Last edited by wearetheborg; 01-24-10 at 07:29 PM.
Old 01-25-10, 01:30 PM
  #163  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 960
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Graftenberg View Post
Well last week nothing happened, she was at her desk on her computer and there were other employees around but it did remind me of something that happened before.

It was maybe two or three months ago and she was sitting down in front of the computer. I had my back to her dropping off and picking up product when I heard her chair moving. I looked over my shoulder to see her chair about five feet from where she was, I turned back around without looking over at her. I thought it was really fucking strange at the time that she would just kick or push her chair like that which is why I still recall it happening. I don't think that anyone else was around at the time.
Here's a project: the next time you are going to be in the same place as her, try to consciously be completely unaware of her actions or any (perceived) reactions to you - as if she was just another person in that location. Don't notice anything about her, and you won't have anything to analyze about it later. Continue to do this until it isn't even a conscious thing anymore, while looking for actual opportunities with other women elsewhere in your daily life.

Life is too short to waste months and months over a specific woman who hasn't done anything, besides looking good, to earn it - a quest where you aren't even sure that the destination is worth the journey.

Personally, after having my mind messed with last month by an ex-something from last summer, I'm taking a holiday from women for a few months. Working out 6 days a week, and getting in some reading. Besides, sometimes the best way to find something is to stop looking for it.
Old 01-25-10, 01:39 PM
  #164  
DVD Talk Legend
 
wishbone's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 21,345
Likes: 0
Received 132 Likes on 90 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by lucasorion View Post
Here's a project: the next time you are going to be in the same place as her, try to consciously be completely unaware of her actions or any (perceived) reactions to you - as if she was just another person in that location. Don't notice anything about her, and you won't have anything to analyze about it later. Continue to do this until it isn't even a conscious thing anymore, while looking for actual opportunities with other women elsewhere in your daily life.

Life is too short to waste months and months over a specific woman who hasn't done anything, besides looking good, to earn it - a quest where you aren't even sure that the destination is worth the journey.

Personally, after having my mind messed with last month by an ex-something from last summer, I'm taking a holiday from women for a few months. Working out 6 days a week, and getting in some reading. Besides, sometimes the best way to find something is to stop looking for it.

This post is so money.
Old 01-25-10, 01:50 PM
  #165  
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 4,031
Received 11 Likes on 9 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by lucasorion View Post
Here's a project: the next time you are going to be in the same place as her, try to consciously be completely unaware of her actions or any (perceived) reactions to you - as if she was just another person in that location.
So, in short, the next time he sees her you want him to think about not paying her any attention. So ... the attention is focused on not giving her attention. So ... what some chant ... like 'I'm not thinking about you"?

Thanks for the laugh.
Old 01-25-10, 02:43 PM
  #166  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 960
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by ctyankee View Post
So, in short, the next time he sees her you want him to think about not paying her any attention. So ... the attention is focused on not giving her attention. So ... what some chant ... like 'I'm not thinking about you"?

Thanks for the laugh.
basically, yeah - not the chant, but the predetermination not to pay attention to her, until the artifice of the act becomes what he is actually doing - not paying attention to her. How else does he begin to stop paying attention to her besides the conscious intent to do so?
Old 01-25-10, 03:57 PM
  #167  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
Thread Starter
 
Graftenberg's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: sector 2814
Posts: 2,022
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by wearetheborg View Post
Agree with everything above (except sleeping with her ex which may or may not be true)

EDIT: read through this entertaining and illuminating thread. So she WAS boning her ex.

OP: Are you still in touch with original girl ?

Yes we have been emailing each other.
Old 01-25-10, 03:59 PM
  #168  
Moderator
 
Groucho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
Posts: 71,383
Received 117 Likes on 79 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Graftenberg View Post
It was maybe two or three months ago and she was sitting down in front of the computer. I had my back to her dropping off and picking up product when I heard her chair moving. I looked over my shoulder to see her chair about five feet from where she was, I turned back around without looking over at her. I thought it was really fucking strange at the time that she would just kick or push her chair like that which is why I still recall it happening. I don't think that anyone else was around at the time.
Ditch the girl, and fuck the ghost.
Old 01-25-10, 04:06 PM
  #169  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
Thread Starter
 
Graftenberg's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: sector 2814
Posts: 2,022
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by lucasorion View Post
Here's a project: the next time you are going to be in the same place as her, try to consciously be completely unaware of her actions or any (perceived) reactions to you - as if she was just another person in that location. Don't notice anything about her, and you won't have anything to analyze about it later. Continue to do this until it isn't even a conscious thing anymore, while looking for actual opportunities with other women elsewhere in your daily life.

Life is too short to waste months and months over a specific woman who hasn't done anything, besides looking good, to earn it - a quest where you aren't even sure that the destination is worth the journey.

Personally, after having my mind messed with last month by an ex-something from last summer, I'm taking a holiday from women for a few months. Working out 6 days a week, and getting in some reading. Besides, sometimes the best way to find something is to stop looking for it.

I understand exactly what you are saying.

Last year was a really bad year for me and I made a lot of mistakes. I knew that I had to turn things around in my life this year. Everything I would go into that store I would try and get done and out of there as fast as I could just to avoid her. I hated being around her and it always put my in a bad mood. That was one of the things that I needed to change so at the beginning of this year I decided that I would go in there with a positive attitude. And the first time that I did that is when she talked to me. I was really not expecting that.
Old 01-25-10, 04:26 PM
  #170  
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 4,031
Received 11 Likes on 9 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by lucasorion View Post
basically, yeah - not the chant, but the predetermination not to pay attention to her, until the artifice of the act becomes what he is actually doing - not paying attention to her. How else does he begin to stop paying attention to her besides the conscious intent to do so?
I know you mean well but I find the concept of guys not paying attention to members of the opposite sex without merit. After all, this is a guy that notices where a certain woman has positioned her chair for Pete's sake.

I do think your intention is good but beyond the obvious (that this dude needs to get a satisfying love life) I don't think much else will help.
Old 01-25-10, 04:31 PM
  #171  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 960
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by ctyankee View Post
I know you mean well but I find the concept of guys not paying attention to members of the opposite sex without merit. After all, this is a guy that notices where a certain woman has positioned her chair for Pete's sake.

I do think your intention is good but beyond the obvious (that this dude needs to get a satisfying love life) I don't think much else will help.
I'm saying he should stop paying attention to her, especially because he is even paying attention to where her chair is, not to stop paying attention to the opposite sex in general. I don't think you're reading what I'm writing.
Old 01-25-10, 04:34 PM
  #172  
DVD Talk Gold Edition
Thread Starter
 
Graftenberg's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: sector 2814
Posts: 2,022
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

So how any I supposed to not notice when someone kicks their chair five feet away?
Old 01-25-10, 04:42 PM
  #173  
2017 TOTY Winner
 
Save Ferris's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 13,580
Likes: 0
Received 2 Likes on 2 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Groucho View Post
Ditch the girl, and fuck the ghost.
Old 01-25-10, 07:08 PM
  #174  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 960
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

Originally Posted by Graftenberg View Post
So how any I supposed to not notice when someone kicks their chair five feet away?
it isn't supposed to be significant to you
Old 01-25-10, 07:27 PM
  #175  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: under the stars with a great view of the mountains and a the lovely aroma of cow shit.
Posts: 14,599
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Re: Should I just give up on dating? Part 2: A New Hope

honestly I would. You have no game, and girls are not interested in you. you should turn in your dick and try for the fellas you might have better luck.


BTW nothing turns on girls more than a sniveling little pussy. FYI im not saying you are a pussy, i'm just saying that girls dont like guys who act like pussies. For the record you are not a pussy.

Last edited by damn_skippy; 01-25-10 at 07:29 PM.

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright 2021 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.