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kvrdave- - the slumlord chronicles.

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kvrdave- - the slumlord chronicles.

Old 03-25-08, 08:12 PM
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kvrdave- - the slumlord chronicles.

Thought you might all enjoy a trip through the slumlord chronicles.

Welfare mom became too much of a pain in the ass for me to continue renting to her. Most of the damage you will see happened over a period of years. It became obvious that I might as well keep her renting since it couldn't get any worse. But then she just started to piss me off, so I gave her the boot. Let's take a trip and see what this lovely whore left me with.

We'll have to use the back door because I busted up the door handle on the front.


This is the back yard. Nice little creek runs through it. Not terrible. Some crap left around, but this isn't bad.



Here's the back complete with pedophile delight. The nice thing about being a slumlord is I now own that doll. Oh, the things....I digress. There is also some weight lifting equipment in the back, a punching bag, etc. Let's go in.


Well, she left a washer and dryer combo, and my wardrobe just got a lot bigger.


Living room could be worse. Left an entertainment center and a couch behind me. Dresser is there as well. She was nice enough to paint things in dark colors that will require many coats of primer. That's always nice. A cat is near my feet, and then it got to go outside.



Hey, there's that couch. I didn't realize this until today, but the couch is leaning against a little coat closet from the entry. She was nice enough to cut a hole in it so her giant fish tank could fit in the hole and look like a wonderful piece of furniture. Must have been nice to look at while they had dinner. I ended up having to completely tear out the closet, but it did open the room up.


This must have been the kitty's room as I see kitty doo all along the wall. It also looks like it was a happy place for the kids. Kids love yellow rooms and kids love kitties. The poo is just a nice bonus for everyone.


When the welfare checks stop, I think the money will come from being an artist. Spray paint art goes for a lot of money, so I may have to up the rent in this place. It's already decorated. Primer, primer, primer.



These are the good doors. Looks like I will be replacing all the interior doors as I find people like the idea of a door having a mechanism by which they stay closed. The concrete block just isn't good enough for some people.

To some it is the most horrific thing they have ever seen. They are filled with the outrage that people could live like this. They are stunned that people could have such disregard for other people's property. They are shocked that a cat would be left behind and trapped in a house with no way out and no place to go to the bathroom.

To me it was Monday.

The "trashout" guys came by and trashed it out. $343 later, I get ready to paint, replace floors, replace doors, replace windows, etc.
Old 03-25-08, 08:16 PM
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This is what you get for being too easy with your rent policies.
Old 03-25-08, 08:19 PM
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Compared to some of the shit holes they flip on "Flip This House" (or similiar shows), that place doesn't look too bad.

The red ceiling is a very nice touch. Maybe she could consider interior decorating as a second career.
Old 03-25-08, 08:21 PM
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Originally Posted by Deftones
This is what you get for being too easy with your rent policies.

I may want to start having people fill out applications, check them out, and require deposits in the future.
Old 03-25-08, 08:26 PM
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Was she a single mom? If so, how were you able to ever get her out?
Old 03-25-08, 08:29 PM
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Originally Posted by mosquitobite
Was she a single mom? If so, how were you able to ever get her out?
Hmmm, that mound to the right of the swing (in the first picture) looks just big enough to hide a body.

I'm just sayin'
Old 03-25-08, 08:29 PM
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Originally Posted by mosquitobite
Was she a single mom? If so, how were you able to ever get her out?
Started off as two hot chicks just out of high school. Then one got tired of the crap and moved out as the pot smoking boyfriend moved in. Then he knocked her up and she went on welfare. They broke up on occasion, but he was still able to knock her up again. For the past 2 years she has had to pay a total of $16 for rent. Our tax dollars paid the rest.

I started eviction proceedings. Generally all you need is the cops to serve them with a notice to appear in court and they bolt. She did.
Old 03-25-08, 08:30 PM
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Originally Posted by kvrdave
I may want to start having people fill out applications, check them out, and require deposits in the future.
That would probably be a good place to start. I can't imagine not doing those things.

Shall we assume you didn't take the pictures just for our entertainment and that they are for the pending litigation?
Old 03-25-08, 08:30 PM
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Originally Posted by mbs
Compared to some of the shit holes they flip on "Flip This House" (or similiar shows), that place doesn't look too bad.

The red ceiling is a very nice touch. Maybe she could consider interior decorating as a second career.
Sadly, I will say that this is only an 8 out of 10 on the places that I have had to redo. The lady I kicked out that had an emu in the back yard was probably more work than this, but it was a smaller place.
Old 03-25-08, 08:32 PM
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I keep telling you to charge more.

Btw....I totally knew you'd post that here, it was too good not to!

How about the hole in the wall to fit the fish tank....we need pics of that!
Old 03-25-08, 08:34 PM
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Originally Posted by pedagogue

How about the hole in the wall to fit the fish tank....we need pics of that!


obviously the bitch is too dumb to know she tries to put the tank in the door

Old 03-25-08, 08:38 PM
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Hmm... the slum-lord chronicles have nothing on the drink-man chronicles...
Old 03-25-08, 08:40 PM
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Holy smokes!

I'm sure it's hard to find good tennants in your neck of the woods Dave. I'm sure you helping pay her rent made that $16 monthly check a wonderful trip to the bank each month.
Old 03-25-08, 08:41 PM
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Originally Posted by kantonburg
Holy smokes!

I'm sure it's hard to find good tennants in your neck of the woods Dave. I'm sure you helping pay her rent made that $16 monthly check a wonderful trip to the bank each month.

thanks I just blew water out my nose
Old 03-25-08, 08:45 PM
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You might net $100 on craigslist for some of the stuff left behind, entertainment center, workout bench, heavy bag, kids bike, might be easier to just throw it on the curb. Got some decent track lighting in there.

Would the cops yank her out if she didnt bolt or would she have a right to stay being a mom and all?
Old 03-25-08, 08:53 PM
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Man - Dave, that really sucks. You need to start a paypal driven donations address for a lot of this....:


Old 03-25-08, 09:00 PM
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Originally Posted by kvrdave
We'll have to use the back door because I busted up the door handle on the front.
That's code for something, isn't it?
Old 03-25-08, 09:18 PM
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Is that spray paint on the outside wall by the back door?

The place looks pretty good. No holes in the drywall, the sink hasn't been torn down, and the toilet isn't clogged with cocaine.
Old 03-25-08, 09:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Nick Danger
Is that spray paint on the outside wall by the back door?

The place looks pretty good. No holes in the drywall, the sink hasn't been torn down, and the toilet isn't clogged with cocaine.
...plumbing hasn't been ripped out to sell the copper for scrap. Ditto with the wiring.

You got off light. Must be nice.
Old 03-25-08, 09:49 PM
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Do plastic hangers make Mommie Dearest cry too?

It probably could have been worse but it still sucks -- it was your generosity to rent the place and now its your dime to clean it up.
Old 03-25-08, 11:37 PM
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Where's the meth lab?
Old 03-25-08, 11:58 PM
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Originally Posted by 10-7
That would probably be a good place to start. I can't imagine not doing those things.

Shall we assume you didn't take the pictures just for our entertainment and that they are for the pending litigation?
It was all for your amusement, actually. I have a file full of judgements that won't get paid. I doubt I'll bother taking her to court. There really is no upside.
Old 03-25-08, 11:59 PM
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Originally Posted by pedagogue
I keep telling you to charge more.

Btw....I totally knew you'd post that here, it was too good not to!

How about the hole in the wall to fit the fish tank....we need pics of that!

When the trashout guy showed it to me, I didn't have my camera, and the enitre coat closet has since been removed.
Old 03-26-08, 12:02 AM
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Originally Posted by kantonburg
Holy smokes!

I'm sure it's hard to find good tennants in your neck of the woods Dave. I'm sure you helping pay her rent made that $16 monthly check a wonderful trip to the bank each month.
This isn't typical. And if you have enough rentals (hell, if you have only one) then this is eventually going to happen. I actually see two others that will eventually be similar. But, again, it's at the point that so long as they are paying, the place won't get worse. My other "problems" are just pigs, where this gal was fairly destructive.
Old 03-26-08, 12:04 AM
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Is it against the law to accept only credit card payments for rent?

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