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NJ School Bans "Intentional Farting"

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NJ School Bans "Intentional Farting"

Old 02-04-08, 03:26 PM
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NJ School Bans "Intentional Farting"

Middle school issues ban on intentional flatulence

CAMDEN (Feb 1): The Merriam Webster Dictionary definition for flatulence is brief: "flatus expelled through the anus." And while it's a natural bodily function, it seems some Camden-Rockport Middle School eighth-grade boys are taking it to new heights and making a game of seeing who can expel the loudest and grossest flatus.

According to this week's Fire Cracker school newsletter though, the joke's on the boys as the penalty for "intentional farting" is now a detention.

"Strange, but true, thanks to a bunch of 8th grade boys, intentional farting has been banned from CRMS," the newsletter said. "It started out as a funny joke and eventually turned into a game. This is the first rule at CRMS that prevents the use of natural bodily functions. The penalty for intentional farting is a detention, so keep it to yourself!"

According to a group of seventh-grade students milling around downtown following Friday's storm-related early release, the eighth-graders' escapades are well known in the school.

"They would do it in science class and other places," said Jordan Tyler. "It's a natural occurrence and we all do it 16 times a day."

When questioned where he learned that information, Tyler and the other students all said it was true, though they couldn't remember where they heard it.

One of the other students, Kyle Ruger, said the act by the boys was funny, but he had mixed feelings about whether it was appropriate.

Jordan Knowlton minced no words when she expressed how she felt, saying, "It's gross."

Remy LeVine said he was in the class when CRMS science teacher Brad LaRoche talked to all the eighth-grade boys about the issue, as well as the consequences.

Attempts to reach CRMS Principal Maria Libby Friday afternoon were unsuccessful and school Superintendent Patricia Hopkins said she had not heard anything about the issue or the alleged suspected result, though she did get a good chuckle out of the news.

http://knox.villagesoup.com/rewrite/108448.htm

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Well, I guess it's better than getting themselves pregnant.
Old 02-04-08, 03:30 PM
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For all of you who support this, what if they decide to ban booger-eating next? NOT SO SURE NOW, ARE YOU???
Old 02-04-08, 03:33 PM
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I want to know how they determine whether it is intentional.
Old 02-04-08, 03:34 PM
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any fat kid that tries to do sit ups will get detention for sure under the fart policy
Old 02-04-08, 03:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Bandoman
I want to know how they determine whether it is intentional.
Just don't say "pull my finger" before you let 'er rip and you can claim that it was accidental.
Old 02-04-08, 03:37 PM
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Originally Posted by Sweet Baby James
Just don't say "pull my finger" before you let 'er rip and you can claim that it was accidental.
Oooops
Old 02-04-08, 03:52 PM
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They are just sucking the fun out of living.
Old 02-04-08, 04:04 PM
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So what happens if you come back from lunch on bean burrito day? Do you raise your hand and say, "Teacher, I need to let one rip." If the teacher doesn't let you step into the hall, do you get in trouble?
Old 02-04-08, 04:25 PM
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I was in the third grade and I was sitting in a chair (with a tablet arm and the seat, back, and tablet made of wood) in the back of class. I think I had finished my studies so I got to sit in the back and read while the remainder of the class quietly worked at their desks. I was leaned back in the chair and apparently in deep thought because I let one slip out.

The angle of deflection combined with the wooden surface created a nice acoustic rhythm: pa-pa-pa-pa... My immediate thought was, "Did anyone hear me?" To my horrow when I looked up from my book I saw that the entire class had turned around in their desks and were staring at me. After a couple of seconds of silence a girl remarked, "It sounded like a rocket went off."

It certainly was not intentional.
Old 02-04-08, 04:28 PM
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Oh Dear God! I would have been expelled by the end of the first day. This is insanely stupid.
Old 02-04-08, 04:47 PM
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Originally Posted by wishbon3
I was in the third grade and I was sitting in a chair (with a tablet arm and the seat, back, and tablet made of wood) in the back of class. I think I had finished my studies so I got to sit in the back and read while the remainder of the class quietly worked at their desks. I was leaned back in the chair and apparently in deep thought because I let one slip out.

The angle of deflection combined with the wooden surface created a nice acoustic rhythm: pa-pa-pa-pa... My immediate thought was, "Did anyone hear me?" To my horrow when I looked up from my book I saw that the entire class had turned around in their desks and were staring at me. After a couple of seconds of silence a girl remarked, "It sounded like a rocket went off."

It certainly was not intentional.
Oh man, that's great.
Old 02-04-08, 04:57 PM
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Great story wishbon3. I was cracking up out loud at work.
Old 02-04-08, 04:59 PM
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Originally Posted by raven56706
any fat kid that tries to do sit ups will get detention for sure under the fart policy
Old 02-04-08, 06:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Kittydreamer
Oh Dear God! I would have been expelled by the end of the first day. This is insanely stupid.
Really? Where you that loud and stinky? I think most people squeeze out plenty of silent ones, but not the deadly kind.

I see the point of this rule. My girlfriend has this problem with many of her students and they do it to be jerks completely stopping the flow of class. They could just ask to go to the bathroom but they'd rather disrupt the lesson. On a case by case basis I see nothing wrong with this.
Old 02-04-08, 06:49 PM
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Originally Posted by wishbon3
I was in the third grade and I was sitting in a chair (with a tablet arm and the seat, back, and tablet made of wood) in the back of class. I think I had finished my studies so I got to sit in the back and read while the remainder of the class quietly worked at their desks. I was leaned back in the chair and apparently in deep thought because I let one slip out.

The angle of deflection combined with the wooden surface created a nice acoustic rhythm: pa-pa-pa-pa... My immediate thought was, "Did anyone hear me?" To my horrow when I looked up from my book I saw that the entire class had turned around in their desks and were staring at me. After a couple of seconds of silence a girl remarked, "It sounded like a rocket went off."

It certainly was not intentional.


That is great!
Old 02-04-08, 06:56 PM
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I remember once when I was in 4th grade one of the boys farted and the teacher admonished him for it: "If you want to do that you need to go to the bathroom!"

I remember thinking then that she must have either been nuts or have an insanely good control of her bodily functions. Who the hell can hold their farts until they can go to the bathroom?

Odd that I still remember this exchange 30 years later. Probably one of the first times I felt like my teacher was an idiot.
Old 02-04-08, 07:02 PM
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bout 3 yrs ago my nieghbor's mom showed me a referral her son got sent home from school for in the description it read "farting with all his might" i laminated it for him.
Old 02-04-08, 07:32 PM
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Originally Posted by wishbon3
I was in the third grade and I was sitting in a chair (with a tablet arm and the seat, back, and tablet made of wood) in the back of class. I think I had finished my studies so I got to sit in the back and read while the remainder of the class quietly worked at their desks. I was leaned back in the chair and apparently in deep thought because I let one slip out.

The angle of deflection combined with the wooden surface created a nice acoustic rhythm: pa-pa-pa-pa... My immediate thought was, "Did anyone hear me?" To my horrow when I looked up from my book I saw that the entire class had turned around in their desks and were staring at me. After a couple of seconds of silence a girl remarked, "It sounded like a rocket went off."

It certainly was not intentional.
Good story
Old 02-04-08, 07:36 PM
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I have a big trouble with belching. My farting is usually sbd, now.

Anyone ever have those marching band type farts. Like everytime you took a step several notes would come out. Those were the days.

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Old 02-04-08, 07:40 PM
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Kids intentionally disrupting class should go to detention. If they are doing it by ripping ass all the time, then I see no problem with it. I doubt the occasional fart is going to get a kid in trouble.
Old 02-04-08, 07:50 PM
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They could just issue plugs.
Old 02-04-08, 08:04 PM
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Okay, I've got a good related (and true) story.

In my 8th grade social studies class, my good friend let one rip (and yes, it was most certainly intentional). He got laughing so hard that he couldn't stop, and he put his head down on his desk, trying to stifle the laughter, but with his face turning red and his whole body quaking from the effort. The teacher, who had a very dry sense of humor, didn't miss a beat. He kept on with his lecture, no expression on his face, and while talking walked slowly back to the storage closet in the back of the room. He pulled out a can of Lysol, slowly walked over to my friend's desk, still continuing with his lecture on the subject, and sprayed a REALLY long spray of Lysol all around the area. He then casually put the Lysol back, and never broke character nor stopped his lecture.
Old 02-04-08, 08:46 PM
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They're trying to cut down on the number of pink eye cases.

I do wonder however, how many have the need to go home because they expected a fart and got much more.
Old 02-04-08, 09:06 PM
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if this goes national, i'll never leave the house
Old 02-04-08, 09:07 PM
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Originally Posted by Bandoman
I want to know how they determine whether it is intentional.
Sitting on a hard surface and raising your legs a tad while pushing as hard as you can indicates intent.

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