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is it wrong to ask if someone got their gift?

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is it wrong to ask if someone got their gift?

Old 04-11-07, 02:04 PM
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is it wrong to ask if someone got their gift?

i sent someone a birthday gift (they live far away so i cant give it to them in person) which was a gift card. its been a few weeks so mail-wise it easily should have gotten their by now but they never have acknowledged receiving it.

no card, no thanks, no mention when we talk. as if it never happened.

now im not asking for a "oh that was so thoughtful! what a wonderful gift! i love it! thank you soooo much!"

not even a "thanks"

i just want to be sure they got it. period. its a gift card so its almost like cash. theres a possibility they didnt get it (stolen, lost in mail, etc) so can i flat out ask "did you get my gift?"

the reason i ask is, i dont want to sound like a guy asking for a thank you or some sort of praise for being generous or anything like that....because im not. i feel by asking it may make me look like im wanting the "thank you".

i just literally want to know if they got it. i wish i could monitor it online somehow (see if it was spent...but that still wouldnt let me know they spent it and not someone else).
Old 04-11-07, 02:11 PM
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I think the delicate way to approach this is to ask if they ever got your birthday CARD, not the gift card that was in it.
Old 04-11-07, 02:12 PM
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I would not ask about the gift. I would, however, not bother to give this person any more gifts, since they are obviously ungrateful.

You are not being unreasonable to expect a thank you for a gift. The recipient is clearly in the wrong.
Old 04-11-07, 02:13 PM
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Originally Posted by joeblow69
I think the delicate way to approach this is to ask if they ever got your birthday CARD, not the gift card that was in it.
simple answer - thats a good idea. thanks.
Old 04-11-07, 02:13 PM
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Sounds like you talk often. I would have warned ahead I was sending something.
Old 04-11-07, 02:28 PM
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I hate when people don't acknowledge a gift. I don't need a big thank you fanfare, but at least, I like to know if they did get it or if it got lost in the mail. In my case, I do ask.
Old 04-11-07, 04:43 PM
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thanks, pressplay
Old 04-11-07, 05:25 PM
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Nothing wrong with asking.

How about another scenario? How about asking your best man if they gave a wedding gift (because cards with checks could easily get lost on tables). How about getting an answer that they're getting around to it, but not receiving anything 16 months later.

I know how to pick 'em. Classy guy.
Old 04-11-07, 08:28 PM
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Originally Posted by stevevt
thanks, pressplay
You're welcome!
Old 04-12-07, 10:43 AM
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Things get lost in the mail. There is nothing wrong with checking to see that something arrived.
Old 04-12-07, 10:53 AM
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Originally Posted by Vibiana
I would not ask about the gift. I would, however, not bother to give this person any more gifts, since they are obviously ungrateful.

You are not being unreasonable to expect a thank you for a gift. The recipient is clearly in the wrong.
Yeah, they're ungrateful that's gotta be it. Because after all mail theft and lost mail never happens. And no one ever receives a card at a time when they are distracted and honestly forgets to call to acknowledge receipt.
Old 04-12-07, 12:11 PM
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Originally Posted by sracer
Yeah, they're ungrateful that's gotta be it. Because after all mail theft and lost mail never happens. And no one ever receives a card at a time when they are distracted and honestly forgets to call to acknowledge receipt.
I'll give you mail theft or lost mail, but in my book, anybody who neglects to thank someone for a gift -- no matter how distracted or forgetful they may be -- is in the wrong. I'm assuming that the recipient was not involved in a major catastrophe at the time of the receipt.
Old 04-15-07, 06:53 AM
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Call and ask, it's not a big deal.
Old 04-15-07, 10:32 AM
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Send them 3 more. That way if they call and say "Oh, thanks, but I already received your gift" you can guilt-trip 'em with "I never heard from you so I figured it got lost in the mail and you're such a good friend I wanted to be sure you knew I cared enough to remember your special day."


Old 04-15-07, 11:04 AM
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Originally Posted by mndtrp
Call and ask, it's not a big deal.
Yeah really. Just call and ask. I don't see what the issue is.
Old 04-15-07, 04:58 PM
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In the past I've wondered if unacknowledged gifts ever reached their destinations. Now I sometimes send a follow-up e-mail to the gift recepient to the effect of "...there was problem with my credit card/PayPal account. They were trying to charge me twice for a gift I sent to you. Did you receive the gift? Two of the same thing? Just trying to clear this up. Thanks!"

If I don't receive a reply to my e-mail, I take them off my gift list!
Old 04-15-07, 07:50 PM
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And let us know if they got their card.
Old 04-16-07, 12:11 PM
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they got it - apparently they dont check their mail very often!

thanks for the suggestions.

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