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Guys: Submit your applications, Paris wants babies, and soon.

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Guys: Submit your applications, Paris wants babies, and soon.

Old 07-05-06, 09:06 AM
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Guys: Submit your applications, Paris wants babies, and soon.

Mommy dearest: Paris wants babies, and soon
By Jeannette Walls
MSNBC
Updated: 1 hour ago

Paris Hilton wants to reproduce. Soon. The partying heiress insists she’d be a “great mother” — but the 25-year-old she doesn’t want to wait long because she doesn’t want to be an “old mom.”

“I know in my heart of hearts I would be a great mother,” Hilton told the London Mirror. “I have a lot of beautiful animals that I look after and I feel that I would have a lot to give to my children. . . . And I don’t want to be an old mom — hopefully it’ll happen soon, within the next five years.”

And, despite her reputation for being a skimpily clad man-killer, Hilton insists she’s cautious when it comes to her love life.

“One-night stands are not for me,” she said. “I think it’s gross when you just give it up. Guys want you more if you don’t just hand it to them on a platter. If they want you, then they will wait. You have to make them work for it.”

Hilton also had harsh words for her former best friend and “Simple Life” co-star, Nicole Richie. “I only want friends who are there for me just like I’m there for them. Otherwise it’s too painful,” she said. “I brought Nicole on to ‘The Simple Life,’ and all of a sudden she became this different person. She dropped her old friends and she’s someone else.”

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Old 07-05-06, 09:08 AM
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Oy.
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Old 07-05-06, 09:10 AM
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I'll be first in line. I don't want to be much further back than that, because I don't want sloppy hundredths.
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Old 07-05-06, 09:16 AM
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Old 07-05-06, 09:16 AM
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She thinks she would be a good mother. That's pretty funny.
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Old 07-05-06, 09:26 AM
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Originally Posted by Deftones
I don't want to be much further back than that, because I don't want sloppy hundredths.
Too late.
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Old 07-05-06, 09:27 AM
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Ahh, hotdog down a hallway always gives me a chuckle.
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Old 07-05-06, 09:35 AM
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If you want her tighter, you can always ram a hamhock in the happy chute before you stick your dick in.

She couldn't possibly be a worse mother than Britney Spears. Can she?
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Old 07-05-06, 09:39 AM
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Paris Hilton is trash and always will be.
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Old 07-05-06, 09:53 AM
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"Yeah, 'cuz having babies, thats hot"
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Old 07-05-06, 10:43 AM
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Well I want my resume to be short because I want her to read it. And I want to to have everything in it that is important to her because I want her to choose me.


RESUME

Name: kvrdave
Qualifications: Has penis
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Old 07-05-06, 11:07 AM
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Aww, too bad hearing her new song on made me sterile...
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Old 07-05-06, 11:09 AM
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Originally Posted by kvrdave
Well I want my resume to be short because I want her to read it. And I want to to have everything in it that is important to her because I want her to choose me.


RESUME

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The question is: do you have enough sperms?
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Old 07-05-06, 11:11 AM
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It's good to see that taking care of animals means you're fit for parenthood.
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Old 07-05-06, 11:18 AM
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Originally Posted by McHawkson
The question is: do you have enough sperms?
Enough that birth control cannot stop me.
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Old 07-05-06, 11:19 AM
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Originally Posted by kvrdave
Enough that birth control cannot stop me.
Are you sure you remembered to take the pill EVERY day?
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Old 07-05-06, 11:31 AM
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Originally Posted by cdollaz
She thinks she would be a good mother. That's pretty funny.
To be fair, im sure she could hire a very good mother with her money.
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Old 07-05-06, 11:34 AM
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Originally Posted by jon-w9
Are you sure you remembered to take the pill EVERY day?

No, but it wouldn't matter. I am that damn potent.
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Old 07-05-06, 11:34 AM
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Besides, I bet her skull weighs more than her torso. Thats gotta be weird in the dark.
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Old 07-05-06, 11:41 AM
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She's a witless, stupid skank.

So, to quote George Carlin...

"I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick."
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Old 07-05-06, 11:42 AM
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Hmmm...this thread seems familiar.

http://forum.dvdtalk.com/showthread.php?t=421212

She's lowering her expectations, I see. Last time, it was "in the next two years". Now it's "within the next 5 years".
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Old 07-05-06, 11:49 AM
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Originally Posted by Joe Molotov
Hmmm...this thread seems familiar.

http://forum.dvdtalk.com/showthread.php?t=421212

She's lowering her expectations, I see. Last time, it was "in the next two years". Now it's "within the next 5 years".
In her defense, I think she fully believes that five is less than two.
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Old 07-05-06, 12:12 PM
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Can we all just agree never to mention or pay attention to Paris Hilton again?
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Old 07-05-06, 01:47 PM
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I just don't understand how anyone could find her attractive. I probably wouldn't turn it down if she were right in front of me. Heaven knows I've had worse. But I can't see making any special effort to hook upwith her.
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Old 07-05-06, 02:02 PM
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Uhm...I find her attractive, and would gladly sprinkle me some of that game. She is pretty much everything I look for in a woman: Heiress (rich), beautiful, and a bit bitchy. It is my trifecta.

Yes I have poor taste in women....which is why i'm single.

-p

Last edited by NotThatGuy; 07-05-06 at 02:04 PM.
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