Go Back  DVD Talk Forum > General Discussions > Other Talk
Reload this Page >

In the interest of accuracy, let's rename all the holidays.

Other Talk "Otterville" plus Religion/Politics

In the interest of accuracy, let's rename all the holidays.

Old 02-20-06, 03:54 PM
  #1  
DVD Talk Hero
Thread Starter
 
Numanoid's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Down in 'The Park'
Posts: 27,882
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
In the interest of accuracy, let's rename all the holidays.

It has occurred to me that for the most part, none of the U.S. holidays are celebrated according to their original meaning anymore. So I say that we rename them to more accurately reflect the way they are currently celebrated.

I'll start with one possibility:

Independence Day (aka The 4th of July) will henceforth be known as Get Blotto, Eat Bar-B-Que, And Blow Off Your Hand Day.




Let's hear yours, and be creative people (unlike me).
Old 02-20-06, 04:02 PM
  #2  
Moderator
 
wendersfan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Nuova Repubblica di SalÚ
Posts: 32,957
Received 5 Likes on 4 Posts
Easter could be renamed "'Honey, do you remember where the church is?' Day"

St. Patrick's Day might be "Green beer makes the prettiest vomit Day".
Old 02-20-06, 04:04 PM
  #3  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Minor Threat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2000
Posts: 13,739
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Christmas could become Consumeristic Pigs Day......
Old 02-20-06, 04:14 PM
  #4  
DVD Talk Limited Edition
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Memphis, TN
Posts: 5,583
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
MLK Day could be "Winter Festival of White Guilt".
Old 02-20-06, 04:18 PM
  #5  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,204
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Oooh, oooh! We could take Mother's Day, right? And we could rename it, uh, something like, Thanks But No Thanks You Awful Bitch, Why Did You Always Love My Older Brother More Than Me, I Hate You So Much And Yet All Of My Girlfriends End Up Looking Just Like You...

Ummmmm... "Day".
Old 02-20-06, 04:19 PM
  #6  
DVD Talk Hero
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Shackled
Posts: 35,372
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Are these supposed to be funny? If so, can Mojo get a do over?
Old 02-20-06, 04:22 PM
  #7  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,204
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Originally Posted by Bushdog
Are these supposed to be funny? If so, can Mojo get a do over?
Yes he can! Because today is ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN DAY!!!




And I can't believe that out of all the lame-ass jokes here, you single out mine. For shame.
Old 02-20-06, 04:31 PM
  #8  
DVD Talk Hero
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Shackled
Posts: 35,372
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Originally Posted by NCMojo
And I can't believe that out of all the lame-ass jokes here, you single out mine. For shame.
Actually the whole thread was lame. You were least likely to get pissed when I said it wasn't funny. Start being an ass, that'll make me more worried about busting your balls.
Old 02-20-06, 04:31 PM
  #9  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 562
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Valentine's Day could be renamed to:

Syphon Money from the Wallets of Men Day

Last edited by Silt; 02-20-06 at 04:47 PM.
Old 02-20-06, 04:33 PM
  #10  
DVD Talk Godfather
 
The Bus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 54,876
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
I personally liked The Onion's infograph that had holiday-themed stores (like a Halloween costume store or a Christmas store) and one of them was Martin Luther Mattress King.

rofl

Their best joke in years.
Old 02-20-06, 04:36 PM
  #11  
DVD Talk Hero
 
El Scorcho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 39,628
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Thanksgiving = "Now I remember why I don't live close to my extended family" day
Old 02-20-06, 04:50 PM
  #12  
Enormous Genitals
 
Bandoman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: a small cottage on a cul de sac in the lower pits of hell.
Posts: 33,242
Received 1 Like on 1 Post
"Arbor Day" = "Tree Day"






I crack myself up.
Old 02-20-06, 05:10 PM
  #13  
Guest
 
Join Date: Jul 1999
Location: Glendale, next to L.A.
Posts: 18,486
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Originally Posted by NCMojo
Oooh, oooh! We could take Mother's Day, right? And we could rename it, uh, something like, Thanks But No Thanks You Awful Bitch, Why Did You Always Love My Older Brother More Than Me, I Hate You So Much And Yet All Of My Girlfriends End Up Looking Just Like You...

Ummmmm... "Day".

You have 'issues' ?



Chris
Old 02-20-06, 05:16 PM
  #14  
DVD Talk Special Edition
 
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,778
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Father's Day = National Collect Call Day
Old 02-20-06, 05:17 PM
  #15  
DVD Talk Special Edition
 
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 1,778
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Secretary's Day = "'Honey, I have to work late tonight.' Day"
Old 02-20-06, 05:57 PM
  #16  
DVD Talk Hero
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Words
Posts: 28,207
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
4th of July: Beers, Breasts, and things that go BOOOM!

-p
Old 02-20-06, 07:01 PM
  #17  
Banned
 
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: The Illustrious State of Fugue
Posts: 6,257
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
dress as your id sees fit the weekend prior to and get drunk day. (or night)

(my favorite)
Old 02-20-06, 07:05 PM
  #18  
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
 
lordzeppelin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Pittsburgh, PA GO PENS!
Posts: 4,946
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
A tip of the hat to Patrice O'Neal on this one...

Easter - Let's have fun finding these eggs cause the jews and romans fucked jesus up day
Thanksgiving - LEts celebrate all the indians who got musketed in the face so we could have this turkey
Old 02-20-06, 07:17 PM
  #19  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,204
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Wow, this really is one suckalicious thread.
Old 02-20-06, 07:29 PM
  #20  
DVD Talk Hall of Fame
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Oklahoma, USA
Posts: 8,494
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Originally Posted by NCMojo
Wow, this really is one suckalicious thread.
President's Day = Suckalicious Thread Day
Old 02-20-06, 07:43 PM
  #21  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Kittydreamer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 13,611
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Originally Posted by El Scorcho
Thanksgiving = "Now I remember why I don't live close to my extended family" day
OMG! So very true!!
Old 02-20-06, 08:22 PM
  #22  
DVD Talk Hero
Thread Starter
 
Numanoid's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Down in 'The Park'
Posts: 27,882
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Originally Posted by NCMojo
Wow, this really is one suckalicious thread.
So suckalicious, you can't resist us.
Old 02-20-06, 09:13 PM
  #23  
DVD Talk Platinum Edition
 
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,227
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Casimir Pulaski Day ---> Christmas
Old 02-20-06, 09:40 PM
  #24  
DVD Talk Legend
 
Bronkster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: AnaheimLand, SoCal
Posts: 15,872
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Halloween - the dudes at work that dress up like women really are gay Day.

or something.
Old 02-20-06, 09:49 PM
  #25  
DVD Talk Hall of Fame
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 8,572
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
This is a pretty angry thread.

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information

Copyright © 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.