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If you have a TV in your bedroom...

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If you have a TV in your bedroom...

Old 01-19-06, 12:22 PM
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If you have a TV in your bedroom...

...you're having sex only 1/2 as much as you could be!

http://www.thestar.com/NASApp/cs/Con...l=969483191630

More TV equals less sex
Report may come from an android
Jan. 19, 2006. 06:26 AM
VINAY MENON

Brace yourself: TV could be ruining your sex life.

This scientific finding comes from a sociological expert who deciphers human behaviour at the global epicentre of carnal activity. And by that, I mean a sexologist based in Italy.

According to Serenella Salomoni, couples with a TV in the bedroom have sex about half as often as those who do not. This, of course, means that some diabolical fiend has hidden several TV sets in my bedroom.

Salomoni and her team of researchers interviewed 523 Italian couples. The study found that couples with a) no TV in the bedroom had sex an average of b) eight times a month and c) were often too busy having sex to complete the survey.

This rate dropped to four times a month for those who drifted off to sleep while trying to make sense of the dubbed dialogue on, say, Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

"If there's no television in the bedroom the frequency doubles," Salomoni told Reuters, adding, "This is yet another reason why television critics deserve a substantial raise."

Or something like that.

The study was discussed this week on two MSNBC shows The Situation with Tucker Carlson and Scarborough Country with Joe Scarborough.

"Men, don't reach for the remote control," warned Scarborough. "You're going to want to see this because if you're watching this program in bed your love life could be in trouble."

In trouble? I'm no psychologist, but if you're watching Joe Scarborough in bed, sex is the least of your concerns. His guest was therapist Judy Kuriansky.

"For years, we have been advising no TV," she tut-tutted. "The bed should trigger the thought of sensuality and seduction and not stimulation from a football game."

Sounds reasonable.

But, fellas, if you're still not buying her argument, strip down in front of a mirror and ask yourself this simple question: Should I really expect my partner to be aroused by the sight of this body after watching burly, chiseled men smash each other and chase a ball for three hours in spray-on uniforms?

Don't feel bad. After trying this exercise, I ended up screaming like Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone.

On The Situation, Carlson's guest was HBO boxing host Max Kellerman, who wondered if the Italian study had any relevance in North America.

"You don't trust Italian social science?" asked Tucker, always trolling for controversy. "Is that what you are saying?"

Kellerman's reply: "As Woody Allen said in Annie Hall, their rate of intercourse might be different, Tucker." (Initially, I misheard that last word and dropped my martini glass in shock.)

After a few more minutes of crass generalization, Kellerman made this curious observation: "You could argue that there are some shows that are better than sex and therefore worth watching."

Carlson: "Name one."

Kellerman: "Curb Your Enthusiasm."

Carlson: "You think that's better than sex?"

Kellerman: "It may be. A good episode. Did you see the last episode of last season?"

Distressed that anybody could find Larry David better than sex, I wondered if the study had anything to say about sex and TV content. Violence, it seems, halted intimacy in half of the respondents, which may explain why so few babies are conceived immediately after a particularly gruesome episode of CSI.

Still hoping to discredit the study, I desperately began researching the researcher. Some of Salomoni's past studies have found that: Spoiled children grow up to be successful businesspeople, the key to seducing an Italian woman lies in a man's accent, and women prefer partners who are more intellectual than macho.

Alas, I was unable to find any evidence to prove my theory that "Serenella Salomoni" is actually a top-secret code name for a state-of-the-art android that was covertly planted inside Italian academe and co-financed by several shadowy feminist groups hell-bent on destroying all that is sacred to men.

Placing a television in the bedroom has already been blamed for everything from fattening preschoolers to reducing the scores of third-graders on standardized tests.

That was once the bad news. The good news now, though, is that when these kids grow up, they'll be too stupid and out-of-shape to worry about all the sex they're not having.
I didn't think TV was that powerful.
Old 01-19-06, 12:29 PM
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I have a TV in my room but I use it mainly as a nightlight for night time trips to the bathroom or taking care of kids.
Old 01-19-06, 12:33 PM
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Originally Posted by Geofferson
According to Serenella Salomoni...
I had that once. Stupid undercooked chicken.
Old 01-19-06, 01:02 PM
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i have a tv in my bathroom -
Old 01-19-06, 01:05 PM
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Originally Posted by Y2K Falcon
I had that once. Stupid undercooked chicken.
dammit, the first thing I thought to post were those exact words.
Old 01-19-06, 01:41 PM
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Two times zero is still zero. It's not worth throwing out my TV.
Old 01-19-06, 01:53 PM
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Girls come and go....but my TV...that is forever!

-p
Old 01-19-06, 01:57 PM
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It would be an incorrect conclusion that the cause of less sex frequency is the TV. Simple put, the reason the TV is in the bedroom could be because less is already happening there.

I just put a new LCD unit in mine. Go me!

Oh wait...
Old 01-19-06, 02:19 PM
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Originally Posted by RandyC
It would be an incorrect conclusion that the cause of less sex frequency is the TV. Simple put, the reason the TV is in the bedroom could be because less is already happening there.
I was thinking the same thing. Of course, I'm not married so what do I know?

I never really understood the function of a tv in the bedroom for married couples, though. Is it so one person can keep watching tv but they can still go to bed at the same time (for whatever bizarre reason)? Or is it just that they're lazy and want to be in bed at a certain time, even if there are still shows they want to watch?
Old 01-19-06, 02:58 PM
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In my first two years of college i had a TV in my room, but I was also stuck in a small single. This year I had an apartment to myself, and had my TV in my living room, but used my PC with a 17" Flatscreen to watch DVDs and such.

Now I'm back to having a small room with a TV (and the computer in it).

No effect noticed here...
Old 01-19-06, 03:29 PM
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What if you have a TV in your bedroom, and you watch porn?

Did the study conisder that? HUH?
Old 01-19-06, 03:45 PM
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What if you have a TV in your bedroom and your brother in the bunkbed underneath you? roflmao
Old 01-19-06, 03:52 PM
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Originally Posted by scott shelton
What if you have a TV in your bedroom, and you watch porn?

Did the study conisder that? HUH?
I actually have a 90inch projector in my bedroom for just that purpose. And it hasn't hindered my sex life at all!
Old 01-19-06, 04:04 PM
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We have a tv in our bedroom, but it is mainly to show erotic things to enhance our sex life. Sportscenter, Monday Night Football, that kind of thing. The only trouble is Sunday night football. Switch over to Paul McGuire, and I won't be excited for days.
Old 01-19-06, 04:14 PM
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Originally Posted by joeblow69
I actually have a 90inch projector in my bedroom for just that purpose. And it hasn't hindered my sex life at all!
Well... Duuuuhhh...

You have a projector.

Not a TV.
Old 01-19-06, 04:43 PM
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My place has a TV, GF's place doesn't. No diff in frequency from joint ta joint.

Also, we usually watch HBO at night...so... that might skew the results as it's not TV.
Old 01-19-06, 05:07 PM
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Originally Posted by joeblow69
I actually have a 90inch projector in my bedroom for just that purpose.
That's a HUGE projector. Must be one of the early Edison models, huh?
Old 01-19-06, 05:12 PM
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Originally Posted by Y2K Falcon
I had that once. Stupid undercooked chicken.
I am still laughing my ass off over this comment...
Old 01-19-06, 05:50 PM
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When I married the lovely Mrs. Pusser said she had a rule that there would be no TV in the bedroom.

Even though the cable connection was there we have avoided it without a problem.
Old 01-19-06, 05:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Buford T Pusser
When I married the lovely Mrs. Pusser said she had a rule that there would be no TV in the bedroom.
What do you have there instead, your balls in a jar?
Old 01-19-06, 06:00 PM
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We don't have a tv in our bedroom... though I wouldn't mind, because I like falling alseep with the tv on. My wife can't sleep with the TV on though, so one of us (ummm me) had to make the sacrafice.
Old 01-19-06, 06:05 PM
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Originally Posted by Numanoid
What do you have there instead, your balls in a jar?

Nope. Three kids in nearby bedrooms.
Old 01-19-06, 07:42 PM
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I can't fall asleep without a TV on.
Old 01-19-06, 09:04 PM
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Originally Posted by kvrdave
Switch over to Paul McGuire, and I won't be excited for days.
Good news is I believe this past year was his last.
Old 01-19-06, 10:49 PM
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No TV in my bedroom.

But no woman either.

Looks like I have a lose-lose situation here

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