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Help with a ONE QUESTION survey please!

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Help with a ONE QUESTION survey please!

Old 02-17-05, 09:55 AM
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Help with a ONE QUESTION survey please!

I would very much appreciate some help in completing a survey. I have designed a survey at Survey Monkey to gather a general opinion on a topic. Please, if you have a minute, I would really appreciate it if you could complete the survey. It is only ONE QUESTION. Thank you in advance to all those who help.

Survey
Old 02-17-05, 09:59 AM
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Spouse A is an asshole for cheating on Spouse B. The least Spouse A can do is respect the wishes of Spouse B on the kid issue.
Old 02-17-05, 10:07 AM
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Please add any comments you wish to the survey.
Old 02-17-05, 10:12 AM
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so your wife cheated on you, huh?
Old 02-17-05, 10:27 AM
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I am thinking A is mike8317, who didn't say an essay would be involved.

I wrote: If the A and 3rd relationship is serious, it will not serve the interests of the child to pretend as if 3rd does not exist. B is evading the fact the marriage is over and is claiming the child is harmed by the relationship to evoke guilt in A, even though there is no harm done to the child.

I have no idea if that is even remotely close to the truth, but I liked writing it.

Last edited by evitagen; 02-17-05 at 10:33 AM.
Old 02-17-05, 10:32 AM
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Wait, so Third Party (aka Homewrecker) is fucking around with Spouse A (aka Fucking Asshole) while still married and bringing Fucking Asshole around his/her kids?

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Old 02-17-05, 10:34 AM
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There isn't enough info available... is Third Party planning to stay in their marriage? If not and they (A & 3) are going to continue a serious relationship it is inevitable that the child will be around "3". I think there are a lot of hurt feelings and that makes it really hard to separate all the issues.
Old 02-17-05, 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Deftones
so your wife cheated on you, huh?
Yeah, that's just hilarious, isn't it?

Even funnier - what if BOTH his parents were to get cancer - AT THE SAME TIME?
Old 02-17-05, 11:10 AM
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Originally Posted by emanon
Yeah, that's just hilarious, isn't it?

Even funnier - what if BOTH his parents were to get cancer - AT THE SAME TIME?

At the same time!
Old 02-17-05, 11:11 AM
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Why couldn't this just be a poll here with comments below?
Old 02-17-05, 11:13 AM
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I don't know how to do this as a poll where I could see the percentages.
Old 02-17-05, 11:20 AM
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I don't like stuff that has Person A, Person B ect... It makes the thing too abstract for me to think about properly.

It also made me a little suspicious. I was worried that after taking the survey I was going to be told "Congradulations, you just made Hitler have to visit with Beethoven and Einstein."
Old 02-17-05, 11:20 AM
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Where's the choice for Lump Sum?
Old 02-17-05, 11:29 AM
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Originally Posted by emanon
Yeah, that's just hilarious, isn't it?

Even funnier - what if BOTH his parents were to get cancer - AT THE SAME TIME?

And what if they all get hit by a bus walking across the street to the hospital. That is an emmy winning sitcom waiting to happen.
Old 02-17-05, 11:33 AM
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This thread should be a poll. Mods, help out here.
Old 02-17-05, 11:55 AM
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Originally Posted by Mopower
And what if they all get hit by a bus walking across the street to the hospital. That is an emmy winning sitcom waiting to happen.
Old 02-17-05, 12:05 PM
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Alright, I did it........

I'd just like to know why this is important to you.
Old 02-17-05, 12:06 PM
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Sorry, its just way too complicated. Its like one of those SAT math questions, if a train leaves from boston at 70 mph ...
Old 02-17-05, 12:07 PM
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Originally Posted by evitagen
I wrote: If the A and 3rd relationship is serious, it will not serve the interests of the child to pretend as if 3rd does not exist. B is evading the fact the marriage is over and is claiming the child is harmed by the relationship to evoke guilt in A, even though there is no harm done to the child.
Old 02-17-05, 12:12 PM
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If the child is so young, I don't see what the problem is with the child being around 3rd Party. I think it would be more problematic if the child was 7 or 8. The fact that the child is too young to understand, makes it less of an issue IMO.
Old 02-17-05, 12:13 PM
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Originally Posted by Deftones
so your wife cheated on you, huh?
How is that funny?
Old 02-17-05, 12:17 PM
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I put:

I can only answer on a general basis and with much trepedation. I put, YES, but this is only the case if the marriage is truly over. A lot of mistakes have been made by Spouse A leading up to this, and THOSE ACTIONS are the ones that are most harmful to the child. Being around the 3rd party is only a natural following of this. If the marriage is over and Spouse A is serious about this 3rd party, then I would guess a divorce should take place ASAP and it will all make more sense to the children, though that will NOT make it any easier for them. I'm not a big fan of divorce, but by going the route of a lasting affair, it sounds like that course has already been set.

It's not a good situation either way. But pretending that things are okay with mommy and daddy and ignoring the 3rd party won't really change that. The kids are not going to fully understand either way. The impact this will have on them in the future will be great.

But there are other factors we don't know about. Age of the children, relationships with the parents, personalities of the adults involved... all of these could chagne the answer above.

Best wishes to you and your children, and I hope that somehow this all works out for the best.
Old 02-17-05, 12:18 PM
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Originally Posted by Toad
How is that funny?
[Captain Obvious]
I believe the alleged humor comes not from the alleged fact that his wife cheated on him, but that he allegedly chose to disguise the fact with a survey written like a word problem from 6th grade math class.
[/Captain Obvious]

Humor, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. I'll illustrate with an example which bears no resemblance to real life:

Let's say Forum Member A has a wife who is a cheating slutbag and decides to post a SurveyMonkey.com survey about it. Forum Member B thinks the manner in which Forum Member A tried to ask a question about his options is humorous, and states so publicly. Then there is another guy, we'll call him Indignant Party, who comes along and casts aspersions at Forum Member B's couth.
Old 02-17-05, 12:20 PM
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Originally Posted by JustinS
[Captain Obvious]
I believe the alleged humor comes not from the alleged fact that his wife cheated on him, but that he allegedly chose to disguise the fact with a survey written like a word problem from 6th grade math class.
[/Captain Obvious]

Humor, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. I'll illustrate with an example which bears no resemblance to real life:

Let's say Forum Member A has a wife who is a cheating slutbag and decides to post a SurveyMonkey.com survey about it. Forum Member B thinks the manner in which Forum Member A tried to ask a question about his options is humorous, and states so publicly. Then there is another guy, we'll call him Indignant Party, who comes along and casts aspersions at Forum Member B's couth.




ooops - is it okay to laugh at this.
Old 02-17-05, 12:21 PM
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I will add here that if I was person B in this, I would most certainly not want my children hanging out with said 3rd party either. But that doesn't mean that person A can't do that if they want and I don't think the impact on the kids will be any worse given the already difficult circumstances. But again, every situation is different and you can't cookie-cutter this.

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