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RevLiver 12-06-04 12:03 PM


Originally posted by Tommy Boy29
She told me before that she used to run cross country; well, that's not quite true, she would walk behind the cross country team as they did their training.
rotfl

Oh my God, that's hilarious. Sorry, man, but that is the best redefining of participating in something I've ever heard.

skiblet 12-06-04 12:33 PM

TommyBoy, id say yours is the winner so far. thats pretty bad.

the line about the bottled water killed me. -

MJKTool 12-06-04 01:07 PM


Originally Posted by Kevin Phillips
When I was in high-school I had the standard crappy minimum wage job. However, there was a really hot-looking coworker, who was about 19 at the time, was a bit of a flake, but was pretty nice to me. After a few months, I quit. A while later, I lost contact with her.

A few years later, I decided her 21st birthday was a good excuse to try and re-establish contact, so I gave her a call. She told me she had recently broken up with her boyfriend (YES!!!). She asked me if I would take her to see Charlie Daniels, who was doing a show at a local theater. I, of course, jumped at the opportunity, thinking I might have a chance with her.

I picked her up and got to the show. While waiting in line to buy the tickets, she started flirting with two guys in line behind us. Right after we got inside, she disappeared with one of them for about an hour.

After the show, she asked me if I'd take her and the two guys someplace to get some drinks. I chauffered them to a couple of clubs. I even gave those guys a ride back to their place. I STILL thought I might have a chance with her. However, the only thing I got from her was a peck on the cheek when I dropped her off at her parent's house.

Looking back, I still can't believe I let myself get used that badly.

Holy shit man! YOU WIN!

:lol:

Giantrobo 12-06-04 01:37 PM


This girl had to have been about 6'-6'2" and about 250 pounds.
Hel-lo! :drool:

The funny thing is a chick like that could be honest about her looks/height/size online and get tons of guys who have no problem with her. I can think of plenty of sites and Groups for guys who like Big girls/Amazons/tall girls.

But sadly she's not honest and so she ends up with guys who freak out when they meet her. :lol:;):(

HistoryProf 12-06-04 01:42 PM

when i was about 22 or 23 i met this chick at a bar who was very cute, gregarious, and fun. We would chat once in a while, and she seemed to know some of my friends well enough to sit with us when we were out and whatnot. We end up exchanging numbers after a couple impromptu hang-outs and i give her a call. We have two nice conversations and I ask if she wants to go do something the next night. She enthusiastically says yes and we go get something to eat...nothing fancy. She's really funny and kind of out there and i'm having a great time. Then she says we should go to her place...GOLD! I'm trying to stifle my excitement and playing it cool as we drive out to her house. We get there, get out of the car, and walk up the the front door when she stops, turns around and says: "Wait, right here is where I first saw him."

"Excuse me?" is my confused reply. "Jesus" she says, this is where he first came to me. uhm..........ooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkk. I laugh thinking that she must be kidding, for there has been ZERO inclination that she even goes to church, let alone sees Jesus on her porch. She smoked like a chimney, hangs out at bars, etc etc. So I say something along the lines of "yeah right ha ha" and reach for the door when she grabs my arm and looks sincerely as can be at me and says "oh, i'm not kidding, he visits me often. I don't know where i'd be without Jesus."

I was in complete shock at this turn around......we went into her place, she shows me some clothes she's designed - again, pretty cool stuff too - but keeps interjecting things about Jesus and how he helps her to get by and inspires her designs and yadda yadda yadda....I'm not sure how long I was there, but it felt like a year....i bailed as soon as I could.

FF a few days, we talk on the phone and I decide what the hell, and get into a huge devil's advocate there is no Jesus/God debate with her on everything from evolution to the catholic church. It was actually the most fun i had with her. That, however, was sadly our last conversation, which i distinctly remember ending with her adamant insistance that god put dinasour fossils in the ground to test us and that I just had to believe. "I believe I'm going to go now" was my response.....

good times indeed.

Gizmo 12-06-04 01:51 PM


Originally Posted by brizz
"Wait, right here is where I first saw him."

"Excuse me?" is my confused reply. "Jesus" she says, this is where he first came to me.

That is so fucking funny. I have no idea what I would do in your situation. I would either laugh my ass off, or run for the hills. But first, Id pee right where 'jesus' was and say "Take that bitch!".

NotThatGuy 12-06-04 02:16 PM


Originally Posted by Maxwell Smart
Long story short I end up sleeping with her friend and I didn't spend a dime.

That happened to me this summer, it was cool. I still talk to the girl here and there, but she is 2000 mi away, so there is no pressure for anything. :)

-pedagogue

skiblet 12-06-04 02:39 PM

She pulled the ole Jesus line on you too huh ?

thats a desperate last resort bail-out, works everytime -

HistoryProf 12-06-04 02:43 PM


Originally Posted by skiblet
She pulled the ole Jesus line on you too huh ?

thats a desperate last resort bail-out, works everytime -

In retrospect, i considered that maybe that was the case, but alas, she was a true jesus freak. I later discovered that I was not the only guy she'd got back to her place only to spring that on them. Apparently, she was fishing for souls to save by wearing tight jeans, half shirts, and smoking camels. She was older than I, but i found out from others that she had been a freak in High School too, just not of the Jesus variety....that came in college i guess.

Too bad, she was really cute and had a great body.

Tommy Ceez 12-06-04 02:50 PM

Until I met my fiance I had never been on a date in my 30 years....like in The OC, here we just did the group hang with couples peeling off for the hook-up.

NotThatGuy 12-06-04 02:53 PM

I actually haven't been on too many bad dates. I tend to meet friends of friends, instead of 'strangers', etc. Though I have a couple of odd ones that come to mind:

I ended up back at this girl's house watching a movie..."House on Haunted Hill". (NOT a date movie). I didn't think of it as a date, since we just met because our best friends are dating...but the next thing I knew she jumped me. In the background there was a guy getting chopped up, yelling, screaming, etc. Her dog came running down the stairs and was up in our business, her parents were yelling to get the dog to come back up. (her parents are night owls) I thought her father was going to come down the stairs and see his daughter in a compromising position, thankfully he didn't. At the end of the night I say goodbye and her parents are just chilling in the kitchen and we had an uncomfortable conversation (at least for me, since I just had relations with their daughter all of 20 minutes ago) We ended up 'sorta' dating that summer, and it was the easiest break up ever. She was not my normal type, but an awesome girl.

I once took a girl out for V-day to one of the best seafood places in B'more....while we were sitting at the table I found out that she was rarely ate any kind of meat. Doh! She was a girl I knew of for awhile, and someone I started to hook up with...but never really thought to ask if she was a vegatarian....Thankfully the night ended well for us, but it made for a funny story. Her best friend just laughed at me.

-pedagogue

Tommy Boy29 12-06-04 02:55 PM

Story 2
 
Well, if you liked the first story, I think this one at least is on par with it.

So I went to school in the New England area while most of my friends stayed in the Midwest. A high school friend of mine contacted me one day and said that her roommate had a friend going to school by me and thought we should go out on a date. I figure what the hell, why not, and give the girl a call. She seems very nice over the phone and we make plans to go out for dinner some time. We decide to meet at a central location. So I go to meet her and she's a cute girl, fairly attractive, nothing I need to run from. So I introduce myself and she's a very easy person to talk to and since I'm more of a listening and she likes to talk, I let her go at it. Well, about 10 minutes into the converstaion she starts telling my that she used to be clinically depressed and have an anxiety disorder. O . . K quite a bit to be telling someone you just met on your first date. Then she tells me that she also has IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). TERRIFIC. What more would I possibly need to know about this girl. Well, we go to dinner and I ask her if she'd like to order an appetizer, and she says sure, but nothing with cheese because, and I quote "It gives her gas." I smile and say no problem and decide on something without cheese, dont' remember what exactly. She then excuses herself to go to the bathroom, where she remains for the next 10 minutes, because I can only imagine her IBS was acting up. SO we order and eat and decide to go for a walk along the waterfront, again she is doing ALL the talking, I don't think I've said more than two words this whole time. She's telling me about her family and how her dad wasn't around while she was a child, and yada yada yada. FINALLY, 4 hours later, we go back to her place and she says she'll give me a ride home. So we get back to my place and she kinda leans in for a kiss and I promptly hold out my hand, shake her hand and say we should hang out again sometime. I leave the car and never talk to her again.

Piece of advice: BLIND DATES SUCK!

WillieTheShakes 12-06-04 02:55 PM


Originally Posted by Giantrobo
I can think of plenty of sites and Groups for guys who like Big girls/Amazons/tall girls.

So?
They are?

Tommy Ceez 12-06-04 03:00 PM


Originally Posted by WillieTheShakes
So?
They are?

I believe giantrobo.com/meet is one.

HistoryProf 12-06-04 03:22 PM

as is brizz.com/tallchicksrock ;)

seriously, i'm 6'3" and it was always my dream to date/sleep with a girl my height or even taller....but that's a tough demographic to crack....woe is me.

sfsdfd 12-06-04 03:29 PM


Originally Posted by brizz
seriously, i'm 6'3" and it was always my dream to date/sleep with a girl my height or even taller....but that's a tough demographic to crack....woe is me.

I've done that.

And I'm 5'8".

- David Stein

FinkPish 12-06-04 03:40 PM


Originally Posted by Tommy Boy29
So we get back to my place and she kinda leans in for a kiss and I promptly hold out my hand, shake her hand and say we should hang out again sometime. I leave the car and never talk to her again.

Denied! HAHAHA!

skiblet 12-06-04 03:47 PM

Ohhhh k,

I just remembered an awesome one. This one was so humiliating that I didnt even know what to do. Good times. (ok, no not really)

I bumped into an old college teacher that i hadnt seen in several years. We got to talking, and eventually she introduced me to her daughter, who was recently divorced.
Her daughter was SMOKING hot. great atheletic body, long blonde hair, and just stunningly gorgeous. No idea why someone would divorce this girl. I tried to ask her mom why that happened, and she hinted that "well, rachael acts a little immature at times". So i thought, ok whatver i can handle that. (i remember thinking to myself, with as hot as this girl is, i dont even care if she acts like a retard)

So her mom sorta sets us up on a date. She encourages me to ask her, says its ok, gives her blessing and all, so I do. Bam, got it all setup, got the car waxed, got the best clothes on, looking good, good spirits and ready to go, so i head over to their place to pick her up. Right on time and everything. She is dressed and ready to go, and looks So good.

As rachael leaves the room, her mom pulls me aside and says, "just to warn you, she is going to test your patience. Its a fair warning. Im just letting you know".

What am i supposed to think about that? What does that mean? I decide to just forget it, and get on with the date. I debated bringing it up to rachael in the car, but decided against it.

Things went well on the way to dinner, very easy going, easy to talk to. Making jokes, everything was going a-ok. We went to a steak house for dinner.

It is taking forever for our food to arrive, it was just very slow. So i open up all the standard topics of conversation, school, her divorce, her hobbies, etc.. etc.. Everything is going well.

I didnt keep track of it at first, but then i noticed after a few minutes that she had allready had several drinks. Our food still hadnt arrived after like 20 minutes. She began to get louder and louder while talking. She began to swear on occasion. I tried to downplay it a bit, but as i looked out of the corner of my eye i could tell that people were giving our table some rude looks.

The topics of conversation that came from her end of the table, within a 5 minute time period, sprialed completely out of control. It went from hobbies and school to oral sex, masterbation, masterbating at work, (specifically had i masterbated at work before), and how many times i do it a day. She became fixated on determining whether or not i masterbate, why, and for how long. At this point she is getting so lit that I begin to question if ill be able to make it until even our food arrives. She is at this point putting her feet up on the table, putting her feet in my lap, putting her napkin ontop of her head like a hat, and swearing loudly for the table behind us to hear.

So finally our food comes, and when the waiter sits her food down, she points at me, and says to the waiter " Can you believe this boy doesnt JERK OFF ?" "Can you believe that?" "He says he didnt, what do you think?"

I felt my soul leave my body. I had no idea at all what to say. What do you say at that point? I sat there in stunned silence for about 20 seconds ( i dont know though, it might have been 2000 seconds), stood up, placed 2 20's on the table, walked out of the restaurante and drove away.

seasmoke 12-06-04 03:53 PM

some funny experiences.....

covenant 12-06-04 03:55 PM


Originally Posted by skiblet
I felt my soul leave my body.


rotfl

MJKTool 12-06-04 03:59 PM

You don't jerk off?

skiblet 12-06-04 04:05 PM

nope its against my religion.






















Ok, so... thats a lie.

attrition 12-06-04 04:14 PM


Originally Posted by skiblet
So finally our food comes, and when the waiter sits her food down, she points at me, and says to the waiter " Can you believe this boy doesnt JERK OFF ?" "Can you believe that?" "He says he didnt, what do you think?"

I felt my soul leave my body. ...

:lol: rotfl Man you guys are killing me!

Cusm 12-06-04 04:24 PM

I never had a huge number of dates, always a hook up with friends or hook up with friends of friends. But when I was right out of high school there was a girl that I had semi-hooked up with once a few years earlier, we ran into each other and decided to go out. This girl said 2 words the whole night. I tried everything I could, but nothing. I had a party to go to and wanted to end the evening with her, so I take her to her house. When I pull into the driveway the whole house is dark, and she makes the comment that no one is home and she does not have her keys. I am not taking this girl to this party and kill any hopes of hooking up with anyone else, so I have to drive around (she says they should be right back to wherever they went) and try to entertain myself and the mute for about an hour waiting for her parents to retuern home, this was one of the worse 45 minutes ever.


And I did not hook up with anyone at the party that evening, but I was away from her and had a good time there.

Giantrobo 12-06-04 04:24 PM


Originally Posted by sfsdfd
I've done that.

And I'm 5'8".

- David Stein

I almost did it. :( I think she was 6'3" and she was the shortest in her family. :eek:


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