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No dancing, no nookie (strangers that talk to you)

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No dancing, no nookie (strangers that talk to you)

Old 10-29-04, 02:48 PM
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No dancing, no nookie (strangers that talk to you)

Do you have any funny stories from strangers talking to you in stores?




Today I was in the grocery store with my 20-month-old son.




The little flirts




He smiled at a woman in her 50's using a walker.

Lady: He's a flirt now, but he won't be when he gets older.

Me: Well our four year old still is.

Lady: Not after he's a teenager. When I go to the bar all the men stand against the wall until it's closing time. Then they come up and ask if I need a ride home. No way. No dancing, no nookie.



She was quite the trip and loved to talk. She also told me about how the cream soup is only .39 a can and this other grocery store wants $1.29.

I also found out the pork tenderloin is really good. "Just six hours in the crock pot and the meat just falls apart."

She also recommends the tuna steak at $3.99 for two.
Old 10-29-04, 03:09 PM
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"No dancing, no nookie" Words to live by if you're into grannies on walkers. Calling Phil L.
Old 10-29-04, 03:21 PM
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This wasn't in a grocery store, but a few weeks ago I was walking down the street discussing the presidential election with co-workers. In particular, the whole "Vietnam" issue. We weren't having a political discussion per se, just talking about what both men did during that era.

All of a sudden some passerby starts yelling at us: "That was TWENTY YEARS AGO! It doesn't matter now. TWENTY YEARS AGO!" I have no idea if he was a Bush or Kerry supporter, but it made me laugh: "Mr. Reagan, pull the troops out of Vietnam!"
Old 10-29-04, 03:25 PM
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Any meat cooked for 6 hours in a crock pot just falls apart. It's great if you have no teeth.
Old 10-29-04, 03:53 PM
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old lady using a walker and has no teeth.
Old 10-29-04, 04:12 PM
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"Do a little dance....

....make a little love...

get Gran tonite!"
Old 10-29-04, 06:58 PM
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Originally posted by OldDude
"No dancing, no nookie" Words to live by if you're into grannies on walkers. Calling Phil L.

Old 10-29-04, 06:59 PM
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Originally posted by Groucho
This wasn't in a grocery store, but

Sorry. I only want grocery store stories.
Old 10-29-04, 07:01 PM
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Originally posted by Roto
Any meat cooked for 6 hours in a crock pot just falls apart. It's great if you have no teeth.

That's what I thought when she said it but she seemed like she could get violent in a flash and I didn't want to test her.



costanza-shame on you and your gum job fantasies.


CheapBastid-I admit to being a big fan of the KC when I was 12.


Old 10-29-04, 07:03 PM
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Once while I was waiting for a bus an attractive girl started talking to me for no reason whats-so-ever. She just introduced herself and we had like a 20 minute conversation. I mean, maybe once or twice you'll make a comment to someone ("Boy, this bus is ALWAYS late!"), and you might talk a little bit, even have a fairly decent conversation stem from it... but this was different - she just walked up to me, and introduced herself, and talked to me until my bus came. I'm still rather confused by it all.
Old 10-29-04, 07:06 PM
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Originally posted by BizRodian
Once while I was waiting for a bus an attractive girl started talking to me for no reason whats-so-ever. She just introduced herself and we had like a 20 minute conversation. I mean, maybe once or twice you'll make a comment to someone ("Boy, this bus is ALWAYS late!"), and you might talk a little bit, even have a fairly decent conversation stem from it... but this was different - she just walked up to me, and introduced herself, and talked to me until my bus came. I'm still rather confused by it all.
It's less confusing when you realize she had an adam's apple.
Old 10-29-04, 10:49 PM
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I'm always polite to elderly women who want to small talk while waiting for the bus. However, I'll always remember the time when it was very hot last summer. I was reading a book while waiting for the bus and this guy came up to me and said "Hot enough for ya?" I told him I didn't hang out at bus stops to make new friends... He shut up after that
Old 10-29-04, 11:01 PM
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Darkfriend, you are mean! damn man.

Elderly ladies always try to engage in small talk at the bus stop, I've noticed that too...

Originally posted by Suprmallet
It's less confusing when you realize she had an adam's apple.
I said she was attractive damnit!
Old 10-30-04, 12:33 AM
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While waiting for the subway tonight this older man on the platform was going from person to person asking them if they had attended college. When he got to me I told him to fuck off. Who knows... maybe he's looking for someone to answer "University of Southern California" then, he shoots them.
Old 10-30-04, 12:36 AM
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Originally posted by BizRodian
I said she was attractive damnit!
Hey, there are some convincing trannies out there. I'm not holding it against you.
Old 10-30-04, 02:06 AM
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Originally posted by BizRodian
Darkfriend, you are mean! damn man.
Yeah, I felt a bit like an asshole but it felt good

I'm sure the conversation would have strayed into the "but it's the humidity!" conversation so I put a stop to that!
Old 10-30-04, 09:14 AM
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True grocery store story. Attractive woman in a tennis outfit goes up to the water fountain at Kroger... just up the aisle from where I was shopping. She bends over for a drink of water and has no underwear on. She was obviously doing it on purpose. Conversation SHOULD have ensued, eh? But it didn't.
Old 10-30-04, 09:15 AM
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"Cream"
"Pork"
"Meat"
"Tuna"

She wanted you.
Old 10-30-04, 09:33 AM
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I was with my now ex-wife and couple months old son at Pizza Hut, he was in a little carrier thing in the seat beside me, when an older lady came up to the table, stared at the baby for a bit then stared at me and said "He looks just like you. Is he your's?"
I said "Nope, I thought he looked like me too, so I took him." She looked confused and just walked away.
Old 10-30-04, 02:04 PM
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Originally posted by Abelkems
I was with my now ex-wife and couple months old son at Pizza Hut, he was in a little carrier thing in the seat beside me, when an older lady came up to the table, stared at the baby for a bit then stared at me and said "He looks just like you. Is he your's?"
I said "Nope, I thought he looked like me too, so I took him." She looked confused and just walked away.
Old 10-30-04, 02:16 PM
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i used to rid the bus a lot. one night on the way to work, a very animated gentleman (high) was sitting next to me. apparently he had been on the bus for awhile because every one else had cleared the area around him. i myself wasn't privy to the info that my fellow riders were carrying so i sat near him. he went into his story about how he was attacked earlier in the evening by a man with hooks for hands. i had to ask if both of his hands were hooks, and he said yes. he said the guy was swinging the hooks around back and forth, he was bouncing around pretty good very funny to see. he was demonstrating the hook swinging on me, almost connecting with his wild hook swinging. a fun story to hear, and see in other words. anyway he said he was going to go back up there and kill the guy, of course. i told him that that wasn't such a good idea. killing people is a bad idea, even if they are hook wielding maniacs. he said he had to keep it real though. you know what i'm saying? i never heard anything on the news about it, this is the kind of story the man would probably cover up i'd guess though.

when i saw the dave chappelle sketch about keeping it real a few years later i thought of my bus riding pal. good times
Old 10-30-04, 02:19 PM
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Originally posted by Darkfriend
Yeah, I felt a bit like an asshole but it felt good

I'm sure the conversation would have strayed into the "but it's the humidity!" conversation so I put a stop to that!
But it's the humidity ALWAYS. Thats what its all about.
Old 10-30-04, 03:26 PM
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Originally posted by Darkfriend
Yeah, I felt a bit like an asshole but it felt good

I'm sure the conversation would have strayed into the "but it's the humidity!" conversation so I put a stop to that!
Good fucking point!

Originally posted by costanza
i used to rid the bus a lot. one night on the way to work, a very animated gentleman (high) was sitting next to me. apparently he had been on the bus for awhile because every one else had cleared the area around him. i myself wasn't privy to the info that my fellow riders were carrying so i sat near him. he went into his story about how he was attacked earlier in the evening by a man with hooks for hands. i had to ask if both of his hands were hooks, and he said yes. he said the guy was swinging the hooks around back and forth, he was bouncing around pretty good very funny to see. he was demonstrating the hook swinging on me, almost connecting with his wild hook swinging. a fun story to hear, and see in other words. anyway he said he was going to go back up there and kill the guy, of course. i told him that that wasn't such a good idea. killing people is a bad idea, even if they are hook wielding maniacs. he said he had to keep it real though. you know what i'm saying? i never heard anything on the news about it, this is the kind of story the man would probably cover up i'd guess though.

when i saw the dave chappelle sketch about keeping it real a few years later i thought of my bus riding pal. good times
That is great. Reminds me of this thread which I had actually forgotten about, and is actually the same subject as this one. Heh.
Old 10-30-04, 03:40 PM
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Originally posted by BizRodian
Good fucking point!



That is great. Reminds me of this thread which I had actually forgotten about, and is actually the same subject as this one. Heh.
i remember that thread, i should've put that story in there. it was back when i was more of a lurker than a poster though.
Old 11-01-04, 12:36 AM
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A friend of mine is a syndicated cartoonist and he'll sometimes do "True Story" strips.

Do you think my nookie one would be a good one?

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