Toad

"Yes I am a pirate
200 years too late
the canons don't thunder
there's nothing to plunder
I'm an over 40 victim of fate
arriving too late, arriving too late."

Jimmy Buffett -- "A Pirate Looks at 40"

Iron Chef

Your butt is wide, well mine is too.
Just watch your mouth, or I'll sit on you.
The word is out, better treat me right,
'Cause I'm the king of cellulite.
Ham on, ham on, ham on whole wheat, all right.

"Fat" by Wierd Al

Toad

Along those lines:

...He said, "Luke, stay away from the darker side,
And if you start to go astray, let the Force be your guide."
Oh, my Yoda
Yo Yo Yo Yo Yoda
"I know Darth Vader's really got you annoyed,
But remember if you kill him then you'll be unemployed."
Oh, my Yoda
Yo Yo Yo Yo Yoda

Well, I heard my friends really got in a mess
So I'm gonna have to leave Yoda, I guess
But I know that I'll be coming back some day
I'll be playing this part till I'm old and gray
The long-term contract that I had to sign
Says I'll be making these movies till the end of time
With my Yoda
Yo Yo Yo Yo Yoda


"Yoda", also by Weird Al

Gdrlv

Both by the Old 97's (who write some of the best lines I've ever heard)

"So, I went through the motions with her/
Her on top, and me on liquor/
It didn't do no good/
But I didn't think it would . . .
What's so great about the barrier reef?/
What's so fine about art?"
-"Barrier Reef"

"Why aren't you here?/
It's almost 4 a.m./
I finished off all of your beer/
Now I'm startin' on your gin/
Went through your diary/
Flipped through your phone book/
Called all your friends/
I just wanna know where you been/
I pulled back your sheets/
Now I'm lyin' in your bed/
Every drink's one more defeat/
And every footstep hurts my head/
Yes, I'm a loser/
But I like bein' miserable and livin' in sin/
I just wanna know where you been . . .
I hope you crash your mama's car/
I hope you're passed out in some bar/
I hope you catch some kinda flu/
Let's say I wish the worst for you"
-"Wish the Worst"

Three Day Delay

"Tonight our bed is cold,
Lost in the darkness of our love,
God have mercy on the man,
Who doubts what he's sure of."

Bruce Springsteen, Brilliant Disguise

DodgingCars

i'm perfection's countervail.
i'm torn into pieces
i'm made contrite
and in my darkest hour the brightest light
draws near to me a torch to end all torches
this is the light that sets me free
all shadows burn away now
but by his grace i am sustained
though all was lost
now all is found and more is gained

"A Torch to End All Torches" - Thrice

DJLinus

"I'm so tired
of my mood
and sleep comes
with a knife, fork and a spoon"

--"Am I Wrong" by Love Spit Love

Still trying to figure out that one. My theory's that sleep is consuming him. I dunno.

madcougar

I'm facinated that out of about six responses, someone posts lyrics from my favorite song. You my friend, have champagne tastes.

benedict

I always liked this one from the (English) Beat:

BDB

Lit De Parade by Army Of Lovers incl oblig pic.
Count the ribbons in the sky
Sadness makes the ribbons fly
Evil grows a drive for tears
Tears are born in states of fear
Damage done I leave behind
After-life my state of mind
Dream's a dream a time gone by
I long to live the day I die

Three Day Delay

I figured I was good for something.

Mister Beefhead

The most remarkable thing about coming home to you is the feeling of being in motion again

It's the most extrordinary thing in the world

I have two big hands and a heart pumping blood and a 1967 colt 45 with a busted safty catch

The world shines as I cross the Macon County line
Going to Georgia

The most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway
is that it's you-

and you're standing in the doorway and you smile as you ease the gun from my hand and I'm frozen with joy right where I stand

The world throws it's light underneath your hair
forty miles from Atlanta this is nowhere
Going to Georgia

"Going to Georgia", The Mountain Goats

Mister Beefhead

"Sometimes I think I'm the only one who feels like going nowhere is like giving up"

Less Than Jake, "Al's War"

lordzeppelin

Oh...there are so many to choose from...

"Though the course may change sometimes, rivers always reach the sea" - Led Zeppelin, Ten Years gone

"...this feeling gets old, and so do your eyes, this is why, I hate you, cause, so far I've been down that's true, except for your love...I just smile, stand still, while you look right past me...ask why, just asking why, your cold, heart, lies..." - Deftones, Damone

"All my dogs raise your cup to this girl, toast
I don't wanna put shame to ya really,
I wanna put flames to ya sincerely,
Make your box spring jump like a low rider
best place I can be is inside ya..." - Q-tip from A Tribe Called Quest, Way you move

"Don't matta just don't bite it." - NWA She Swallowed It

"anything goes when it comes to hoes, cause pimpin ain't easy" -Big Daddy Kane, on Prince Paul's Prince among thieves, Mackula's Theory

"Smack it up, flip it, rub it down...OH NOOOOOOOOO! Do me Baby..." - Bell Biv Devoe, Do Me

"I've been really trying baby,
tryin to hold back this feelin, for soooo long
and if you feel, like I do honey
Whoo, come on, yeah come on, Hoo
Let's get it on, Let's get it on...Let's love baby" - Marvin Gaye Let's Get It On

"You're perfect, yes it's true,
But without me you're only you.
You're menstruated heart,
It ain't bleedin enough for two..." - Faith No More Midlife Crisis

"All the good, that you discover, in people that you hate,
Draw them close, and pencil thin, then they're easy to erase...I'd rather be insulted by you, than someone I respect" - Helmet, Birth Defect

"I'm so damn smooth that every woman wanna touch me, got so much sexuality that nuns wanna f**k me" - Ice-T Pimp Anthem
and there's so many damn more...