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Because unlike the old movies that supposedly inspired it, "The Mummy" has no atmosphere, no menace, no romance. And instead falls back on the Marvel Blockbuster Blueprint - motiveless villain, mystical power source, demolished cities and lots of spin-off possibilities...

It's not that a new "The Mummy" has to have a perfectly calibrated story. But it should have a sense of what made the original story appealing. And then find a way to make it new and different - diving deeper into the tale's mythology, or barely veiled eroticism. It has to have its own reason to exist beyond simply raising a tentpole.

Unfortunately director Alex Kurtzman neither has a strong visual sense, nor a hint of how to stage action, nor use actors. "The Mummy" has always been about undying passion. Yet after casting the alluring Sofia Boutella as the ancient Egyptian, he keeps her wrapped up in bandages or prudishly blurred. No eldritch eros here.

But then that's the point, as well as the problem. "The Mummy" isn't really a mummy movie. It's barely a horror movie. What it's really meant to be is the launch of the studio's new marketing megaverse where the monsters are the new superheroes, and spinoffs and sequels can continue into franchised infinity.

And that may be the scariest thing of all.

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