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Clerks III (D: Kevin Smith)

Old 01-01-14, 09:05 PM
  #126  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

More info on Helena Handbag here.

I must stress this quote from Smith:

Granted, this time the plot of the movie concerns mankind teaming up with Hell to save existence from extinction at the hands of a Rapturing giant Jesus - which means the budget has to be LOW, because NOBODY'S gonna wanna make that movie. At all. And I know this going in, so I won't be heartbroken if it never goes beyond the script. But... if the script is funny enough? Who knows? That walrus movie seemed pretty daffy and far-fetched until we were standing on the TUSK set bringing that shit to life four months and change after first making it up in episode 259 of SModcast.
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Old 01-01-14, 09:14 PM
  #127  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

On Kevin Smith's Facebook today:
HELENA HANDBAG: THE SMUSICAL!
So I spent 24 hour feverishly writing another script based on an episode of SModcast - this time SModcast # 52: The (C)Rapture. I got about 20 pages in when I realized there was no way to write this inexpensively as a feature film. Everything was requiring too many effects that I could never achieve using in-camera tricks like forced perspective. It was starting to feel like a pricier project than I know I'd ever be able to find money to make. And then I remembered this is a SModcast Picture. What do we do on SModcast sometimes? We sing. We make up stupid songs. And my favorite piece of art ever produced by human hands is the glorious BOOK OF MORMON. So... I started reshaping the HELENA HANDBAG script as a piece of SMusical theater, with BOOK OF MORMON as my spirit animal. And holy shit... does THIS feel right! After making up all those goofy tunes on EDUMACATION and PLUS ONE, not to mention the FAT MAN ON BATMAN theme song, this feels like a logical progression. And it'll be fun (and way easier) to stage in a theater! I'm a marginally-straight 43 year old fat man who has always loved show tunes: I guess I'd better finally try writing a musical. So there you go: another look inside the creative process. One day, you think you're writing a movie. The next day, you realize it's a that tuner you've always wanted to write. And making up songs? That's the kind of whimsy I can push forward even if I'm standing in the shower (where I normally only masturbate and try to reach hard-to-wash areas with a loofah on a stick). Alright: I thought CLERKS: THE MUSICAL would be my first attempt at theater one day. So happy to realize it's gonna be something original instead. And with that, I look to the heavens and shout "FATHER! The fat sleeper who was in the Henry Hudson Regional late-80's performances of DAMN YANKEES and YOU'RE A GOOD MAN, CHARLIE BROWN, and GREASE has awakened! (Here is proof that theater is in my blood: me as Kenickie in GREASE! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BafHPTNUDz4
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Old 01-02-14, 07:56 AM
  #128  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

You know why Smith's screenplays are suddenly turning into small budget/no budget productions? Because no major studio wants anything to do with him anymore. I'll be shocked if CLERKS III ever happens at this point.
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Old 01-02-14, 08:50 AM
  #129  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

His good movies have always been no/low budget. Has he done a $20M+ movie before?

I could see if they didn't like his crass, backhanded handling of selling of Red State (was that Sundance?).

The other thing is that Smith STILL has not had a big movie. Jason Reitman makes a movie for $10M, and it becomes a $230M hit (Juno ... not sure if that was worldwide gross). Now, if Jason Reitman wants, he should be able to direct a more expensive movie.

Every one of Smith's movies have failed to perform like that. They might make some people some money, and get a little bit of critical recognition (all studios pony up a little money each year, expecting critical praise without financial returns). And he has his "fanbase" more than any other director I can think of. But he still hasn't had that $100M hit ... after almost 20 years. I thought the masses would fall in love with Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - they didn't. He did Jersey Girl and it wasn't a $100M romantic comedy. He did Red State, released it himself, and I hope they made some bank on it.

So, Clerks III. Regardless of what they do, I'd be surprised if it brings in more than $25M at the box office. But I thought that Clerks II was pretty great. And I'm already a guaranteed ticket sale on III.
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Old 01-02-14, 06:53 PM
  #130  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Yeah, Smith has been coasting on his Clerks fumes for years.

Can't say I'm really surprised that Smith hasn't had that big hit yet. Pretty much all of his movies are guerrilla-style stoner comedy. Even when he's working with a bigger budget, like Dogma or J&SBSB, his movies look cheap and amateurish.

Clerks is still his best movie and tapped into a certain grunge/slacker zeitgeist, but he hasn't grown much as a writer or director since then, with the possible exception of Chasing Amy. Everything he's done since then just hasn't come together... Dogma wanted to be a philosophical religious fantasy crossed with Cheech and Chong style stoner humor, and it didn't work as either. J&SBSB wanted to be another Cheech and Chong thing, but was too glossy and in-jokey. Clerks II was going back to an old well and felt like a middle-aged family man trying to relive his youth. His attempts at mainstream films, like Jersey Girl and the one with Bruce Willis, fall on their ass because Smith doesn't really have commercial instincts.

I really wanted to like Red State, but I find it so dull that I can't make it through the movie after several attempts.
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Old 01-02-14, 07:52 PM
  #131  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Smith's last half decent movie was Dogma (which could've been amazing with a different director doing his script), and that was 15 bloody years ago. His ship has sailed, I'm sad to say.
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Old 01-02-14, 08:01 PM
  #132  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Dogma was wretched, but I loved Clerks II.
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Old 01-02-14, 08:18 PM
  #133  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Dogma was great, as was Clerks II. Red State sucked, as well as just about all of his non-View Askew universe movies. He'll forever be known only for those movies. So Clerks III is about all he can do to stay afloat now. Maybe Mallrats II after.
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Old 01-02-14, 08:21 PM
  #134  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

He should have done Mallrats 2 years ago.
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Old 01-02-14, 09:16 PM
  #135  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Do people even hang out at the mall anymore?
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Old 01-02-14, 09:18 PM
  #136  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

That will be the genius of Kevin Smith, he will revive the mall. Maybe that'll be his legacy.
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Old 01-02-14, 10:19 PM
  #137  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by Michael Corvin View Post
Do people even hang out at the mall anymore?
Pre-teens and Asians do.

*shrugs*
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Old 01-03-14, 10:11 PM
  #138  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by trespoochies View Post
So Clerks III is about all he can do to stay afloat now. Maybe Mallrats II after.
I think 2 was pushing it for the characters, but it ended up working. The real problem is, I think the movie ended perfect for the characters....a third movie is beyond superfluous.

I still dream of a "Mallrats 2", but it will never be as great as I imagine it.
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Old 01-05-14, 07:56 PM
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by Michael Corvin View Post
Do people even hang out at the mall anymore?
I do, sometimes.

Anyone remember when Smith said he would do Mallrats 2: Die Hard in a Mall as a comic book? Kind of a shame he recently said that he wasn't being serious. He did say that may one day do the Dogma prequel comic with Bartleby and Loki that he's also talked about.
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Old 01-05-14, 08:58 PM
  #140  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

I want Mallrats on blu-ray
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Old 01-06-14, 12:47 AM
  #141  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Saw Jersey Girl recently. Actually not that bad. I've heard it is supposed to be in his View-Askew universe but I didn't see any connections. Maybe I'm forgetting something in the other movies.
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Old 01-06-14, 01:25 AM
  #142  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by anomynous View Post
I want Mallrats on blu-ray
http://www.blu-ray.com/movies/Mallrats-Blu-ray/43731/
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Old 01-06-14, 01:42 AM
  #143  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

His Askewniverse stuff is pretty much all funny to me. In fact "Zack and Miri" isn't too shabby either--he was able to make Seth Rogen come off as funny, which is no mean feet.

It's a shame that with all his Hollywood connections he can't be taught to be a more effective director, or at least a director who is more multiplex-friendly. But, I still think he's a wonderfully unique voice in the world of movies, and cinema would be a poorer place without him.
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Old 01-06-14, 06:51 AM
  #144  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by resinrats View Post
Saw Jersey Girl recently. Actually not that bad. I've heard it is supposed to be in his View-Askew universe but I didn't see any connections. Maybe I'm forgetting something in the other movies.
While generally not considered part of Kevin Smith's so-called "Askewniverse" series, the film does have one potential tie-in character/actor: Betty Aberlin portrays an unnamed nun in both this film and Dogma (1999), her role being substantially larger in this film.
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Old 01-24-14, 10:05 AM
  #145  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Rosario Dawson said she's coming back for this.




Hopefully we get another dance scene
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Old 01-24-14, 10:43 AM
  #146  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by anomynous View Post
Rosario Dawson said she's coming back for this.




Hopefully we get another dance scene
NO!!!11!

She was the absolute worst thing about Clerks 2 and that dance scene was the worst scene of the movie. If I could put a roving blot over her face every time she's on scene and edit out the dance scene it would be a much, much better movie.
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Old 01-24-14, 12:30 PM
  #147  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by anomynous View Post
Rosario Dawson said she's coming back for this.




Hopefully we get another dance scene
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Old 01-24-14, 12:32 PM
  #148  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by Michael Corvin View Post
Do people even hang out at the mall anymore?
Yup, all the kids still hang out at the mall.
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Old 01-24-14, 12:33 PM
  #149  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by anomynous View Post
Rosario Dawson said she's coming back for this.




Hopefully we get another dance scene
She is still fairly close with Brian O'Halloran, so that makes a ton of sense.
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Old 01-24-14, 12:36 PM
  #150  
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Re: Clerks III (Smith, Sometime this Decade)

Originally Posted by John Pannozzi View Post
I do, sometimes.

Anyone remember when Smith said he would do Mallrats 2: Die Hard in a Mall as a comic book? Kind of a shame he recently said that he wasn't being serious. He did say that may one day do the Dogma prequel comic with Bartleby and Loki that he's also talked about.




I think Ben and Matt have paid back Kevin enough lol.
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