The Funniest Line You've Heard in a Movie This Summer (2006)
 

Out of all the summer films I've seen, none has contained a line that has brought me to the floor in hysterics like this one:

I love you, vacuum cleaner dummy. -- Monster House

Context, of course, is everything.

You?

I thought the funniest line from 'Monster House' was the line from Chowder

'my dad's at a bar and my mom's on a date with her gym instructor'

... or something to that effect.

"Time is Tissue?!" - Sam Jackson Snakes On A Plane

Um, all I'm going to say is that it was in Clerks 2 and was obnoxiously racist.

"I like to imagine Jesus as a dirty hobo. Cause I see a dirty hobo and I'm about to hit him, cause he's a dirty hobo, but then I'm like wait, there's something special about this guy"

I didn't care for Snakes on a Plane, but I did think the occasionally off-screen shouts of "Snakes!" was pretty funny.

The entire Jesus conversation was near fucking brilliant.

This is my vote as well. Snakes was an OK/good movie, but those lines were brilliant.

pick any line from the "Pillow Pants" scene in Clerks 2.

Jean Girard is sitting on the pole, which is a statement of fact and in no way a comment on his sexual orientation.

When Robert Langdon over-dramatically whispers "Da Vinci!" in The Da Vinci Code.

"I will come at you like a spider-monkey!"

"I've got all five senses and I slept last night, that puts me six up on the lot of you."

The "and I slept last night" in particular cracked me up, not sure why.

So, an Indian, a Frenchman, and the Pope are all on a plane. The pilot says, "Hey, are any of you not circumcised?" So the Pope lifts up his robe and says, "Shut up, stupid! You don't even speak English!" The Israeli asks the Japanese guy to open his eyes, but the Japanese man says, "I'm not squinting you crazy Jew, you're the one who sold me these cheap glasses!" What's the difference between a Belgian and a lump of dog shit? The Belgian drinks wine, but the dog shit smells good.

The racism scene from Clerks II had me laughing like De Niro in Cape Fear.

whats this from?

"I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence."

"If you don't chew Big Red then F*** YOU!"

Pretty much anything from Talladega Nights. Hysterical movie.

TK

Brick...great movie.

I wanna thank little baby Jesus, who's sittin' in his crib watchin the Baby Einstein videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors.

"Dear little 8 pounds 6 ounces baby Jesus..."

MATT

Seconded.

Don't remember the exact line, but from Talledega Nights:

"One of y'all turds is about to get smacked in the mouth!"

or

"Dad, you just made that grace your bitch!"

I laughed some before that scene, but that was when I exploded and nearly fell out of my chair. Such a great line.

"Don't you stick that knife in your leg..."

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall"

The most horribly funny line in a movie spoken by Tom Cruise in MI:3.