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ANACONDAS - Review - FINALLY!

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ANACONDAS - Review - FINALLY!

Old 08-25-04, 10:54 AM
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ANACONDAS - Review - FINALLY!

Hey all,

I attended a special press-release screening of Anacondas last night…. For the casual moviegoer, it may be ok, but for anyone who appreciates film (especially horror movies) it is absolutely ridiculous.

I won't go into to many specifics, but everything was over-done and the cliché's ran thicker than the jungle they were in! One of the characters was put in the movie just to scream and whine -- and it's a guy! I was about to ask if this was a pre-release cut or something because the CGI snakes were SO fake looking - it wasn't it was the way it is! I cannot believe that they are not embarrassed to include such terrible effects.


Also, those looking for gore-laden snake feasts...forget it! The blood was minimal, much less the guts! There is actually no shots of the actors really being bitten....well, when there is, the poorly-done CGI snakes are so blurry, they cover any eating action. TYhe snakes are never focused on during an attack, it's quick and blurry, perhaps to mask the fact that they couldn't achieve any quality "eating" effects....

I don't want to say much more without giving away specific scenes, but anyway….. just see it for yourself, then add your comments to mine… ask questions if you want..


Thanks,

Matt
Old 08-25-04, 11:02 AM
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Your second paragraph could go for the first movie as well ;-P
Old 08-25-04, 12:54 PM
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But are there boobies?
Old 08-25-04, 02:11 PM
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Originally posted by Rogue588
But are there boobies?
THe movie is PG-13 there not gonna so tits.
Old 08-25-04, 06:46 PM
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This line from the Associated Press review (*1/2 out of ****) is so classic I had to share it:

“Anacondas” has not the pleasant fragrance of a rare orchid but the stink of something digested and expelled by a snake with an intestinal disorder."
Old 08-25-04, 06:59 PM
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I like this one from Slant

"Who will the snake kill off first: the African-American comic relief guy, the nerves-of-steel heroine, or the treacherous British professor? Take a wild guess."
Old 08-25-04, 08:06 PM
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Originally posted by Mr.Blonde510
I like this one from Slant
Slant? Boooooo!

http://www.filmjerk.com/new/article-1014--0-0.html

"...the biggest name in “Anacondas” is Morris Chestnut. And if you haven’t heard of Morris Chestnut, I envy you. Made seemingly over one long weekend for what looks like lunch money, director Dwight Little (“Free Willy 2,” “Marked for Death”) has his work cut out for him, unable to count on even the title beast, since any appearance by that CG creature only sucks money out of his tiny budget."
Old 09-24-04, 06:09 AM
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I was in the mood for some mindless fun and I'm a sucker for bad b-movie sequels so I decided to see this last night and... I loved it! For what it was... people going off into the jungle to get eaten by giant snakes... it was scary and alot of fun, I was on the edge of my seat eating my popcorn and having a great time. the basic plot was solid, not too complex to distract you from the snake eating but not full of holes either. Better than the first one, IMO. If you like fun action horror movies that put you on a roller coaster ride for 2 hours, and you know who you are, you will love this... if not, go rent some independent artsy film.
Old 02-12-05, 04:14 PM
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I saw it and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was gonna be... it was also better than the first one. I thought the effects were pretty decent. They missed the chance for boobage and the chance to show gore.
Old 02-12-05, 10:07 PM
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Babes can not compare to the first one.
Old 02-13-05, 12:16 AM
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I rented this movie with a friend a week ago and I hated it. The first one was dumb, but at least it didn't feel like some second rate Sci-Fi Channel original movie. The effects were just terrible and I wanted to strangle the southern girl from the moment she opened her mouth...

Last edited by Li; 02-13-05 at 12:23 AM.
Old 02-13-05, 02:50 AM
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Oh come on - she was only southern for the first 10 minutes of the movie... then she just dropped the accent all together.
Old 02-14-05, 07:58 PM
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Um, that girl is actually a Southerner in real life.

I really enjoyed Anacondas. I hated the first one.. its pacing was unbearably slow and the whole thing looked like it was shot through a jar of vaseline. Plus J.Lo was missing her eyebrows.

On the other hand, the sequel is a cool little jungle adventure movie with good production values. It reminded me of Michael Crichton or other adventure novels that I've read. And the director is a hack, but he's a hack who knows what he's doing, so you know you're in good hands. The film moves quickly, looks good, and offers decent thrills. Sometimes that's enough.

It's true about the babe-factor, though; it's reversed in the sequel so that the guys are all like models and the gals are just pleasant.
Old 02-15-05, 09:00 AM
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I really enjoyed Anacondas. And much more so than the first film. I took it for what it was and went into it with the lowest of expectations. Not surprisingly, I had a good time. It's silly and the dialogue and characters are silly as well. But it actually was an enjoyable hour and change. You could do worse. I also liked Frankenfish so, in admitting that I may have just shot all my credibility to hell...Oh well.

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