| G. Noel Gross |
02-04-04 11:16 AM |
From my current column ... click for star ratings ...
<b>THE UNDERGROUND COMEDY MOVIE:</b> Like the stubborn occupant of some hopelessly clogged commode, this putrid pile of gross-out comedy just won't flush without a fight. Bleary-eyed CineSchlockers have likely seen late-night ads squawking about its offensive (a.k.a. hi-larious) content. What they fail to mention is this circa 1996 Kentucky Fried knockoff is about as FRESH as it is funny: a <b>Batman</b> movie parody where the crusader actually uses -- a baseball bat -- get it!?!, repeated stabs at one <b>Orenthal J. Simpson</b> and even a lame play on "I Love L.A." called -- wait for it -- "I <i>Hate</i> L.A." <b>Gena Lee Nolin</b>, then of "Baywatch" babedom, and <b>Michael Clark Duncan</b>, future Oscar nominee, make appearances they surely now wish they hadn't. Other notables who should've known better include drunken guitar slinger <b>Slash</b> as host of a bag lady beauty pageant and Long Island Lolita diddler <b>Joey Butafuco</b> in another top-of-mind movie spoof -- The Godmother -- replete with mumbled Marlon impression. Blame <b>Vince Offer</b> for thinking any nanosecond of his public-access TV hijinks were worthy of upchucking onto celluloid, but have him COMMITTED for his final-credits delusions that his sperm-soaked yuks were stolen by the scribes of <b>There's Something About Mary</b>. 12 breasts. 13 corpses. Projectile ejaculation. Multiple man hineys. Gratuitous hari krishnas. One crotch squib. Gratuitous urination. Pickled fetus feasting. The Rhymer's <i>bonsmots</i> are typical of this disaster: "Give me all your semen and there'll be no screamin'!!!" <i>(1996/1999, 92 mins, 1.85:1, DD 2.0, Original TV show clip, Outtakes, Screen tests, Trailer.) |
