Jazzthetics!!!!!!!
 

I finally found this on dvd for about $5--this is a tremendously schlocky exercise video produced solely to show Traci Lords, former under-age porn queen, in a bikini thrusting her pelvis at the camera. The best (or worst) part is that Traci recites some horrible exercise poetry/rap as the routines are performed, stuff like, "pull it it, push it out, you'll be sexy, there's no doubt." This forced rhyming goes on for 20-30 minutes, but unfortunately there are no subtitles to transcribe from. Can you imagine a bestseller of Traci's verse??? For those familiar with Traci's earliest work, this is a must-have conversation piece--there's no other reason to buy this: you could never convince someone that you bought it for the cardiovascular workout. A complete embarrassment to add to any collection.