I was watching a bunch of Rocky movies this week with some friends. I haven't seen them in such a long time that I couldn't remember a damn thing about any of them. So, sitting there watching these movies I noticed (especially in the later movies) that the boxing matches are so goddamn preposterous. I honestly couldn't stop laughing just how they were all done. How come nobody ever taught Rocky how to guard his face. He took endless amounts of punches that were made to seem that they were powerful enough to knock his friggin' head off!


So, which fight was the most absurd?



My vote has to go to the first Clubber/Rocky fight where Rocky got his ass kicked so badly that during that last slowmo punch... you could hear Rocky's SOUL scream out in pain.

I'm goin' with Rocky III. The fights with Clubber were just outrageous.

I was 7 when III came out. It was on Showtime, and I thought the fight was the coolest thing ever. Then, a while later "Showtime Championship Boxing" was on, and I watched it. It was nothing like the movie. What a tremendous dissapointment.

Definitely Rocky vs Ivan Drago - totally implausable, yet my favorite.

Yeah, not one of those fights in the first 4 would've made it past the first round, but I vote for 5 vs. Tommy Gunn. Street fights don't last 20 minutes of constant punishment, they're more like a few punches, then someone fractures their skull on the pavement.

Definitely The Drago/Balboa fight. In reality that fight would have been stopped within 20 seconds.

Balboa Vs. Thunderlips

Foreshadowing: Balboa Vs. Vin Diesel

A tough choice between Rocky III and IV, as both of those are my favorite Rocky movies, but i had to go with IV.

Street fight with Tommy Gunn. C'mon, bare-fisted and no one gets KO'd within the first couple punches?

Didn't Rocky fight Hulk Hogan in 3? I saw some footage of that fight on TV, it looked so bad.

Rocky is the only character in movies who got better looking the more he got beat up.

Especially if they were fighting in America.

This logic is why I also voted for the Tommy Gunn fight.

They're all pretty ridiculous. Practically every punch lands perfectly.

all of the fights in the rocky movies would've been stopped in the first round. rocky would've lost every fight. actually spider rico would've probably gotten a dq for the headbutt. he probably would've lost to the tomatoes that he fought in part 3 just to hang on to the title for a little while longer. we never actually see any of the fights but i think it's safe to say that he got pummeled to begin with, to get mad, and then kicked ass after that.

Uh-oh. You left out a fight.


There were TWO Clubber Lang matches!!!

The first Clubber Lang fight wasn't much of a match. I can't remember, did Rocky even show up for that fight?

Rocky vs. Mr. T. Definitely a studio idea, and definitely the worst of the bunch.

I enjoy the Drago match.

Rocky III - when Balboa beat Clubber in the re-match. I pity the fool who came up w/ that crazy-ass idea. Nobody liked it - everyone left the theater mad.

That would be my vote.

Forgive me, but ARE YOU INSANE, MAN????


ROCKY III had by far...BY FAR....the BEST Rocky fight of the entire series, and it only went three rounds!

You like the implausible ROCKY IV match, where Rocky falls down every five seconds?

And that Sly Stallone speech at the end in front of Gorbachev- made me cry, and it wasn't due to sadness.

I especially like how Clubber Lang screams in pain out of humiliation at the end of the first round.

I find it implausible that Apollo Creed, a throughbred, alebeit a slightly aged one, could be KILLED by Drago, a green Russian. I understand it's about building the monster character, but I could never buy that Apollo couldn't have taken it to him.

And for your fight fans who say that Rocky fights are implausable, watch Hagler versus Hearns. It's a true physical representation of a Rocky fight. However, it only goes three rounds, as anyone fighting at that pace could only go I'd bet.

I agree.

I'm a die hard ROCKY fan, but for those people who think ROCKY IV is the best movie of the series, I'd like to check their craniums for the lobotomy scars.

Which gives me the idea of similar REAL LIFE boxing matches that reflect the Rocky fights. Let's break it down, fight fans!

Balboa/Creed I-Many fans know that the inspirational idea was from the Muhammed Ali-Chuck Wepner fight where the arrogant Champ (Ali) toyed around with Wepner. To the surprise of everyone, the outclassed challenger scored a knockdown of Ali in the late rounds, but was halted in the 15th and final round...Nobody expected Wepner to make it that far.

Balboa/Creed II-You might think that the outcome of this fight is pure Hollywood. But on October 19,1985 Lee Roy Murphy and Chisanda Mutti scored simutaneous knockdowns of each other in the 12th round. Murphy beat the referee's count and was crowned 190 lb champ.

Balboa/Lang II-If you threw Hagler/Hearns and Jack Dempsey/Luis Firpo in the blender, this is what you might get (I think Mickey even talks about the Dempsey fight in Rocky's apartment in the first film)

Balboa/Drago-The first half of this fight is similar to the 1958 light heavyweight title fight between Archie Moore and Yvon Durelle where Durelle knocked Moore down 4 times in five rounds, only to be stopped himself by Moore in the 11th round. Or you can check out the 1980 heavyweight championship between Mike Weaver and John Tate where Tate (Waaaay ahead on the scorecards) gets KO'd with a hail mary left hook with 45 seconds left in the final round and loses his title.