Rypro 525

I was seeing the two towers opening weekend, packed house, the part where Gollumn does the split personality gag, this one couple is really laughing at that part, part apparently no one got it, since it was dead silent, so it even goes to someone saying "will you two just shut up and watch the movie" but of course, when the short jokes got in the entire theater had lots of laughs.

but my favorites is when the parents tell their little kids to shut their eyes durring the nude scenes (they are old enough to see some guy get pounded graphicly, but a t*t shot here and there, gets all up and arms with parents.

what are some good (or bad) stories you all have.

Parcher

I was watching The Pianist and this old couple behind me KEPT ON TALKING even during the movie's most emotional scenes. Everyone around me kept on hushing them, I hushed them around 6-7 times. Only one who wasn't husing them was some 20's guy sitting next to me trying very carefully to follow the movie.

They kept on talking, louder and louder. The guy had enough and turned around to face them and shouted from the top of his lungs "Shut the FU*K up!"

They stopped talking.

audrey

I’ve got two. I went to see Pitch Black in Chicago with a group of friends. We arrived a bit late; the theater was packed, so we split up in pairs. One of my friends and his wife got stuck next to a gaggle of teenage girls. During the movie, the girls grew fidgety; they ran up and down the isles, chitchatted loudly, played w/ their cell phones, and yelled to their friends across the theater—you get the picture. We could hear them from our seats about 15 rows away; they were loud. When the house lights came up after the movie, police were standing in the aisles along with one of the girls. As my friend walked toward the exit, the police seized him. We spent about 4 hours at the police station waiting to bail him out.

The story that emerged was this…my friend grew increasingly annoyed with the teens’ behavior. After several failed polite attempts to curb the noise, he turned to the girl seated next to him, touched her arm, and said something like, “if you don’t STFU, I’m going to take off my shoe and bop you over the head.” The girl claimed he grabbed her and verbally abused her---since she was a minor, the police took the charge seriously. She refused to drop the charges; months later, the case went to trial where my friend was acquitted, but not before dropping several thousand dollars in legal fees and enduring an endless barrage of jokes.

Another time…several friends and I went to a midnight showing of Eraserhead. The theater was empty; just me and my friends, plus a couple seated a few rows up from us. About mid-way through the show, the couple began kissing and grouping each other. Eventually, the chick climbed onto the guy’s lap and started “bouncing up and down.” We cracked up, but the couple seemed oblivious to our laughter. After the pony ride, they gathered up their things and left. I guess the movie was cheaper than a hotel room.

majorjoe23

I went to see May a few weeks back and ran into a friend from work. I was a group, and so was he, so we were on opposite sides of the theater. Some guy behind me was yacking through the whole movie (mostly pointing out what was happening on screen, he has a bright future doing audio commentaries). My friend went up behind him and said "Shut the F*** up," and when the guy tried to come back, he said "I'd love to sit her and debate how much talking is allowable in a movie, but it's none."

Later the guy went up behind my friend and said "Thanks for ruining the movie for me," to which my co-worker replied "You have a whole theater full of people here to apologise to."

Wag

This story follows a similar plot of the previous posters.

One of the funniest theater experiences I have had was during Pumpkinhead (and yes, even funnier than the plot of the movie! hehe)

Anyway, the theater was pretty sparse (must have read the reviews). My girlfriend and I were sitting about 3/4 of the way back. A few other couples were sprinkled around the front half of the theater. In the middle, there was a row of about 10 kids, probably around the 11-13 years old range: two boys, the rest girls.

One boy, this short kid, thought he was the "card", thinking he was impressing the ladies with his witty comments on all the pre-show advertisement slides. He had some dumb comment for everything, to which all the girls responded with their giggles, which encouraged him even more. Unfortunately, this continued through the previews, right into the first 20 minutes of the movie. Actually, thinking back, he was SOOO ahead of his time, afterall this was 1988, and movie commentaries hadn't even been thought of at that point! hehehe

Anyway, everyone is kind of doing the "looking around, annoyed, wish you would get the damn clue" thing and shushing, but the comedian just kept right on yapping away. Finally this one guy (probably late high school to college age) about 3 rows in front of these kids stands up (and he is a big dude, had to be at least 6'4"), exits his aisle, and walks down the aisle in front of these kids, stopping in front the comedian. Stoops down, grabs the front of the kid's shirt with both hands, picks him up out of his seat, his legs are literally dangling in the air. He brings the kid's face even with his and says "if you don't shut the f**k up, I am going to knock your f**king head off. You understand me?" To which the kids feverishly agreed. The guy then tossed the kid back into his seat and went back and sat down with his girlfriend.

Of course all the others in the theater responded with cheering. You could just see the kid literally shrink into his seat he was so embarrassed, not only in the face of the other people in the theater, but he was humiliated in front of all the little honeys he was trying to impress in probably the worst way possible.

If I hadn't seen it, I wouldn't believe it, because it is so cliched sounding, it would only happen...well in a movie! hehehe

Jazzbutcher

*sniff* that's the most beautiful thing *sniff* that I've ever heard.

Justin00787

When I saw the two towers there was a baby crying the whole time, why bring a baby to a movie? Stupid...
When I was with my grandpa watching a movie (I forgot the movie) there were some teems in front of us talking and my grandpa kicked the guy in the back of the head
When I went to see the Hulk there was this family of Rednecks sitting next to us that would make stupid comments about the hulk and everyone was looking at them, they left after 20 minutes because they said this movie sucks and walked out, I started clapping, but unfortunately I was the only one. I also hate when there are people behind you chewing popcorn in your ear, they sound like pigs, I also hate when there is noone is in the theater and some people have to sit right in front of you when there are 200 other seats they could sit in. I also work at the theater so I have seen many things like racist people and all sorts of things, we also had a rock thrown through a window on opening night of 2 fast 2 furious and we had someone pull the fire alarm once. Well anyway if I can think of anymore I will be sure to post them

Chad

We've already had at least two threads covering this topic recently:

http://www.dvdtalk.com/forum/showthr...hreadid=312128

http://www.dvdtalk.com/forum/showthr...hreadid=292811

scottyblueyes

My worst movie theater experience took place a couple of months ago. I was watching Finding Nemo with my girlfriend. There was a total of about 20 people in this relativly small theater. About 15 minutes into the movie, the smell of weed filled the air. In the second row were two guys smoking joints, filling the air with smoke. One man leaned over and said something. They just laughed and kept smoking. My girlfriend went and got the attendent, who talked to them about 10 minutes later. But by that time they were finished and just played dumb. I personally hate the smell of weed and during a movie makes it even more of a piss off. Luckly, this childrens film was playing later at night and there were no children present.

fender69

My worst experience was at 28 Days Later. You would think that not a single person in the whole theater ever saw a penis before. For about 10-15 minutes after that scene the audience would not shut up; laughing at everything this man on the screen was doing, from checking the phone to drinking a soda.

I could not take it so i apoligized to my girlfriend and told her to I couldn't stay any more. Before exiting the theater i did yell at the audience, calling them a bunch of idiots and telling them I can believe that 1 person, let alone a whole theater full of people, at a rated-r film has never seen a penis before (atleast in other movies).

I did get my money back and my girlfriend and I checked out an early show the following day.

oh, by the way. I saw Finding Nemo a couple of months ago in Canada.......WHOOOOOOOO........I must have been high or something

Superboy

Most of the time when i have a bad experience i just ask for my money back. I've never had a problem getting a refund/gift card.

Good story as in positive? when i went to go see Bruce Almighty on opening night, the whole theater was silent up until the infamous babble news scene. Everyone was cracking up like crazy for over 10 minutes after the scene was over. Afterwards, there would be a couple people laughing left, and then everyone would start busting up like crazy again even though the scene in the movie was serious. It was hilarious.

Spooky

One of the rare moments in American History where the rednecks were right!

Charlie Goose

...so I said, "I know, but this one's eating my popcorn!"

Honk!

cultshock

During an IMAX screening of Attack of the Clones, a woman sitting about 10 rows down from me vomited after about 10 minutes of the film (I'm not sure if this was because of the huge screen or was just her critique of Mr. Lucas' work). This happened twice in a row, and then her boyfriend or husband quickly shuffled her ass out of there. Of course, they neglected to tell the management about the problem, so the rest of the theatre was treated to the smell of half digested jalapeno & cheddar poppers (yes thats what it smelled like ) until the air conditioners thankfully recirculated the air enough. I felt sorry for the people who were sitting in her general vincinity, but none of them even moved after the incident.

UAIOE

edytwinky

Does getting a blowjob during a movie count? Totally awesome experience

Crocker Jarmen

I can never reach.

Rypro 525

had a funny one at revolutions last night. right when a loud mouth right next to me yelled out "oh hell yeah" and everyone cheered and laughed at him. Then during the Neo/Agent Smith fight, he yelled out "We believe in you Neo!" and we all busted out laughing.

Joeboo835

Funniest moment in a theater. I was with my wife watching some movie, i don't even remember what. Place was probably 3/4 full, maybe a bit less. There's a couple in the row in front of us, but like 5 seats across groping and kissing when the movies starts. They pretty much are doing this the entire movie (or at least when i noticed).

About half way through, someone's cell phone (behind us a few rows) goes off. No big deal, they answered it in 2 rings. Then about a minute later, it goes off again, same phone. The girl from the couple making out stands up, turns around and yells "Turn that f***ing thing off".

My wife and I haven't laughed so hard in our lives. Just because it was that particular person that said something.

When my friends and I went to go see reloaded, we were waiting in line to get a seat and there was a couple by us (probably teenagers) with a newborn (probably about 6 months old). I thought that the girl had just stopped by because she came well after they had been tehre, but sure enough they're walking in. They start letting people get seated and i had told my friend "I'll bet you anything that we're sitting near them". Sure enough, they're seated right in front of us. Amazingly, the kid didn't make a peep through the entire movie. My daughter, when she was that age, was probably the quietest baby you'd ever meet, but i would NEVER think of taking her to a movie.

Brian Shannon

All BAD. I will not go to the movies again after "Return of the King".

I now enjoy movies in my own home, see my theater in my signature.

Kicker_of_Elves

When i saw "Attack of the Clones" a guy behind me farted.

I wear hearing aids so for me to be able to hear a fart on top of the sound coming from a movie is amazing. It was right when Jango and Obi Wan were about to kick some ass also. Now that i think about it, i wonder if it was a fan-boy shitting his pants seeing Jango.

Moefuscious

Oh sorry, I didn't mean to.....I ate a bunch of jalapeno & cheddar poppers

Well my girlfriend & I saw Halloween 6 on opening night & it was packed. Of course when attending a horror movie on opening night anything goes & all bets are off. A group of 18-22 year olds next to us were yelling to their other friends that were sitting about 4 rows in front of us. This was constantly going on. Pagers were going off, loud talking, cell phones- you name it. All you could hear was " Yo Pookie, you gots my beeper!! Naw, I ain't got it, who gots it? Where my beeper, where my beeper? Pookie, you want sompin from da consesskin stand?" No lie...this was going on for what seemed like forever. Finally I got fed up & said "Shut the hell up & take that s*** out in the lobby !!" Then the one guy (Pookie I think) said " I know he didn't say dat to me, I don't know who he is talkin too, did you here him?" Nothing happened for a short time afterwards. Ironically during the movie a scene shows a girl topless with what appear to be some of the smallest breasts I had ever seen. A guy from the group yells out " Damn dat girl got some small ass titties!" Well everyone was just rolling In fact most of the theater who was in earshot of it was laughing. Who knew itty bitty titties could unite a movie theater Thank you Moustaffa Akkad!

From that point on, I rarely ever see a horror movie on opening night anymore.

Oraphus

i got a couple:
1. My now ex and I were watching "what lies beneath" in a theater on the opening night.. well she was complaining all night about a stomach pain, but still wanted to see the movie. About half way through i see her leaning down below the seat.. i asked her what was wrong "nothing" she tells me... well 2 min later i see her leaning down again and throwing up this time.. luckily we were right at the side of the isle so the getaway was clean, felt bad for the people left behind though.

2. This one really upset and baffled me.. A female coworker and I are watching Kill Bill during lunch, opening day... the theater is about half full. We're sitting in the middle a few seats away from the left section. About 20 min in to the movie, my coworker taps me on the shoulder and points at a guy sitting directly across form us in the left section. The guy had a napkin, lets say in a tent formation while stroking intensively. this was during the Uma Thurman being in the hospital and getting out of there part. If you've seen the movie there is nothing too sexy or arousing about that part. We're giggling out loud and pointing at him ... but the guy seems oblivious... just stroking away for a good 30min. After a while my coworker feels uneasy so i switch seats with her, but still its hard to concentrate on the movie when you know no less then 12 feet from you a guy is jacking off. I ended up throwing a hand full of popcorn at him to which he didn’t seem to react either.. after the movie when we were waking out.. i called him a sick ***** right to his face to which he gave me a "WTH are you talking about look". Man, that was a first for me, there are some sickos out there..

CROM1

I went and saw Texas Chainsaw Massacre on opening day. The theatre was about half full and I was sitting in the very back row. Halfway through the movie I started hearing high-pitched shrieking noises behind me. Thinking the noises were sounds from the movie I paid no attention to them. As the movie went along, the shrieks got louder and more constant. I then thought to myself how remarkably similar those noises are to noises rats make. I got so paranoid that rats might come jumping out to get at my bag of popcorn. The noises continued, and near the end of the movie I heard something on the ground. I looked over and there was this GIGANTIC rat to my left. Then it just scattered away.

jough

There was this one time a guy's cell phone just kept ringing while in a late showing of "Le Cercle Rouge." Finally, after like, the eighth time, he actually ANSWERS the phone and starts a conversation, laughing loudly and talking.

Since he was sitting in front of me I tapped him on the shoulder and asked him to please hang up and enjoy the film, to which he shoots back "You don't have to hear it, it's sub-titled."

I tapped him a little harder, on the back of the head this time, and with my knuckles. I asked him in a firmer way to please refrain from speaking into his telephone, because talking on the phone during a film can cause colon damage. He turned back around and started talking even LOUDER.

So I pulled out my kitana and chopped his f#%king head off.