Can a ninja dodge a bullet?

Thor Simpson · 11-18-07, 07:36 PM

Let's say there is a ninja in the other room and he's taking all my DVD's and Xbox 360 games and I'm a little nervous about going in there. Say I have a gun and I know how to use it fairly well in target practice, but I'm not a professional marksman or anything. I am also not a pirate.

If I go in shooting, what are the odds of survival for both myself and the ninja?

Your prompt reply is appreciat

crazyronin · 11-18-07, 07:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thor Simpson

Let's say there is a ninja in the other room and he's taking all my DVD's and Xbox 360 games and I'm a little nervous about going in there. Say I have a gun and I know how to use it fairly well in target practice, but I'm not a professional marksman or anything. I am also not a pirate.

If I go in shooting, what are the odds of survival for both myself and the ninja?

Your prompt reply is appreciat

before or after you've had a few adult beverages?

OldDude · 11-18-07, 07:45 PM

Your odds improve greatly if you call 911 and explain how you plan to kill the ninja. They will try to talk you out of it, and that will give the ninja time to run away, ensuring your survival.

If he's still there, YMMV.

McHawkson · 11-18-07, 07:48 PM

I think you watch too many bullshit movies.

Thor Simpson · 11-18-07, 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by McHawkson

I think you watch too many bullshit movies.

If that were the case, why would the ninja be stealing them... huh, smart guy?

lordwow · 11-18-07, 07:53 PM

Absolutely, haven't you ever seen Kung Fu: The Legend Continues?

McHawkson · 11-18-07, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thor Simpson

If that were the case, why would the ninja be stealing them... huh, smart guy?

Realistically, when you start spraying your gun, ninja would have flee without any harm.

crazyronin · 11-18-07, 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lordwow

Absolutely, haven't you ever seen Kung Fu: The Legend Continues?

Please. Thats Shaolin monks not ninjers.

DarthVong · 11-18-07, 08:38 PM

Your odds of survival are very good. According to Mythbusters, ninjas cannot dodge bullets!

GoldenJCJ · 11-18-07, 08:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazyronin

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thor Simpson

Let's say there is a ninja in the other room and he's taking all my DVD's and Xbox 360 games and I'm a little nervous about going in there. Say I have a gun and I know how to use it fairly well in target practice, but I'm not a professional marksman or anything. I am also not a pirate.

If I go in shooting, what are the odds of survival for both myself and the ninja?

Your prompt reply is appreciat

before or after you've had a few adult beverages?

I just assumed the ninja got him before he was able to finish his sentence. I guess ninjas CAN dodge bullets.

Toad · 11-18-07, 09:02 PM

According to realultimatepower.net , you're pretty much screwed. The ninja will probably eat the bullet, and shit it out across the room and right through your heart.

McHawkson · 11-18-07, 09:04 PM

But ninjas can't escape the hippo in thor's bed!

wabio · 11-18-07, 09:25 PM

What makes you think you'd even get a shot off before he lodges three stars in your forehead?

The Bus · 11-18-07, 09:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by McHawkson

But ninjas can't escape the hippo in thor's bed!

Look, his wife has had a kid OK. Cut her some slack, you bastard.

McHawkson · 11-18-07, 09:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Bus

Look, his wife has had a kid OK. Cut her some slack, you bastard.

Uh..... [ahem] I don't referring hippo as his wife! Honest! /me run

Mrs. Danger · 11-18-07, 11:27 PM

A ninja would not HAVE to dodge a bullet.

He could cut it in half with his sword.

Of course, you would not be able to see him to take aim.

DVD Polizei · 11-18-07, 11:56 PM

DVD P say Ninja can't take many DVDs because Ninja skinny and have few places to hold them.

Nick Danger · 11-19-07, 12:08 AM

He must not have had any crackers within reach. RIP.

mndtrp · 11-19-07, 01:35 AM

You wouldn't even know the ninja was there, so the whole discussion is kind of pointless.

Houstondon · 11-19-07, 04:08 AM

Well, there was a gal that wanted to marry me once and I dodged that bullet...

Bandoman · 11-19-07, 05:32 AM

A ninja stole your computer while you were reading this thread.

AGuyNamedMike · 11-19-07, 07:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mndtrp

You wouldn't even know the ninja was there, so the whole discussion is kind of pointless.

Thor Simpson · 11-19-07, 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoldenJCJ

I just assumed the ninja got him before he was able to finish his sentence. I guess ninjas CAN dodge bullets.

Nah, I was being fancy and french. Or something.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mndtrp

You wouldn't even know the ninja was there, so the whole discussion is kind of pointless.

Please. I think he just ordered a pizza. He's only on the 9th movie because the stupid jerk doesn't like owning movies he's never seen before.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Bus

Look, his wife has had a kid OK. Cut her some slack, you bastard.

I just gave the ninja your username. I bet he can trace that as soon as he's done robbing me. Be afraid.

Brian Shannon · 11-19-07, 08:28 AM

After dodging the bullet he would have time to finish this coke, before your body hit the floor.

Tracer Bullet · 11-19-07, 08:32 AM

Throw your baby at the ninja. It is a widely-believed fact that ninjas cannot resist rocking a baby. Thus distracted, you can then sneak up behind the ninja and shoot him.

11-18-07, 07:36 PM	#1
Thor Simpson DVD Talk Hero Join Date: Apr 1999 Location: Seattle, WA Posts: 35,020	Can a ninja dodge a bullet? Let's say there is a ninja in the other room and he's taking all my DVD's and Xbox 360 games and I'm a little nervous about going in there. Say I have a gun and I know how to use it fairly well in target practice, but I'm not a professional marksman or anything. I am also not a pirate. If I go in shooting, what are the odds of survival for both myself and the ninja? Your prompt reply is appreciat __________________ I'm not a fan of people quoting others and saying "This," but... This. - VinVega

11-18-07, 07:45 PM	#3
OldDude DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: MI Posts: 24,487	Your odds improve greatly if you call 911 and explain how you plan to kill the ninja. They will try to talk you out of it, and that will give the ninja time to run away, ensuring your survival. If he's still there, YMMV. __________________ 9/11/2001 - You have awakened a sleeping giant, and filled him with a terrible resolve. - paraphrased from Yamamoto

11-18-07, 07:48 PM	#4
McHawkson DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Jan 2000 Location: America Empire Posts: 13,902	I think you watch too many bullshit movies. __________________ Is that the best you can do, you pansies? - Marv in Sin City Croc RULE!

11-18-07, 07:53 PM	#6
lordwow DVD Talk Hall of Fame Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Boston, MA Posts: 9,415	Absolutely, haven't you ever seen Kung Fu: The Legend Continues? __________________ Her clam does taste like honey though. Now honey I LOVE. That alone makes her awesome in my book. - Slayer2005 Xbox Live:Wowous\|Twitter\|Join The 360Voice DVDTalk Group

11-18-07, 08:38 PM	#9
DarthVong DVD Talk Limited Edition Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Under your bed Posts: 5,663	Your odds of survival are very good. According to Mythbusters, ninjas cannot dodge bullets! __________________ PSN: DARTHVONG XBOX: The Darthvong

11-18-07, 09:02 PM	#11
Toad DVD Talk Limited Edition Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Surrounded by idiots... Posts: 6,991	According to realultimatepower.net , you're pretty much screwed. The ninja will probably eat the bullet, and shit it out across the room and right through your heart.

11-18-07, 09:04 PM	#12
McHawkson DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Jan 2000 Location: America Empire Posts: 13,902	But ninjas can't escape the hippo in thor's bed! __________________ Is that the best you can do, you pansies? - Marv in Sin City Croc RULE!

11-18-07, 09:25 PM	#13
wabio DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Oct 1999 Location: in Bush territory! Posts: 11,613	What makes you think you'd even get a shot off before he lodges three stars in your forehead? __________________ wabio's Economic Threat-O-Meter: [ ] No biggie. [ ] This sucks. [ ] Oh sh_t! [X] The wheels are coming off!! [ ] Time to fear GOD!!!

11-18-07, 11:27 PM	#16
Mrs. Danger Suspended Join Date: May 2005 Location: With Nick Danger Posts: 15,192	A ninja would not HAVE to dodge a bullet. He could cut it in half with his sword. Of course, you would not be able to see him to take aim.

11-18-07, 11:56 PM	#17
DVD Polizei DVD Talk Hero Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Overpricedville, OR Posts: 36,746	DVD P say Ninja can't take many DVDs because Ninja skinny and have few places to hold them. __________________ Blu-ray Titles: ~380 \| HD DVD Titles: ~323 "I don't sell airplane parts. I've never sold airplane parts."

11-19-07, 12:08 AM	#18
Nick Danger DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Albuquerque Posts: 14,450	He must not have had any crackers within reach. RIP. __________________ Originally Posted by TallGuyMe: hoorah for Nick!

11-19-07, 01:35 AM	#19
mndtrp DVD Talk Legend Join Date: May 2004 Location: a mile high, give or take a few feet Posts: 10,802	You wouldn't even know the ninja was there, so the whole discussion is kind of pointless.

11-19-07, 04:08 AM	#20
Houstondon Emeritus Reviewer Join Date: Apr 1999 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 1,818	Well, there was a gal that wanted to marry me once and I dodged that bullet...

11-19-07, 05:32 AM	#21
Bandoman DVD Talk Hero Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: a small cottage on a cul de sac in the lower pits of hell. Posts: 27,799	A ninja stole your computer while you were reading this thread. __________________ "...Bando...you are perfect and awesome." - 4KRG

11-19-07, 08:28 AM	#24
Brian Shannon DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Jun 1999 Location: USA Posts: 11,528	After dodging the bullet he would have time to finish this coke, before your body hit the floor. __________________ Brian Shannon Photography Brian Shannon Photography Blog Brian Shannon on 500px

11-19-07, 08:32 AM	#25
Tracer Bullet DVD Talk Legend Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: IND Crosstown Posts: 23,362	Throw your baby at the ninja. It is a widely-believed fact that ninjas cannot resist rocking a baby. Thus distracted, you can then sneak up behind the ninja and shoot him. __________________ Third World countries are worthy of our derision. -Sean O'Hara Personally, I would say that Tracer Bullet is leading you in the wrong direction. -Supermallet Sometimes you have to decide between the guy who won't give you a cupcake and the one who will stab you in the face. -DeputyDave