Random Facts About Vin Diesel...
06-28-05, 08:10 PM
#1
DVD Talk Special Edition
Thread Starter
Random Facts About Vin Diesel...
Saw this on HTF and thought it was pretty damn funny. Sorry if has been posted before.
http://www.4q.cc/vin/index.php
http://www.4q.cc/vin/index.php
06-28-05, 08:29 PM
#2
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Some of them were pretty funny, these are the ones I laughed at.
A spoonfull of sugar helps the medicine go down. A spoonfull of Vin Diesel will eat through your intestines.
Vin Diesel was actually 'Born with it' and has been quoted as saying, "Fuck Maybelline."
Vin Diesel's ejaculation can kill a man at 100 yards with pinpoint accuracy.
A spoonfull of sugar helps the medicine go down. A spoonfull of Vin Diesel will eat through your intestines.
Vin Diesel was actually 'Born with it' and has been quoted as saying, "Fuck Maybelline."
Vin Diesel's ejaculation can kill a man at 100 yards with pinpoint accuracy.
06-28-05, 09:01 PM
#5
DVD Talk Hero
"One time I was with Diesel in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. Diesel goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm Vin Diesel! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'Viiindeezel' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer!'"
das
das
06-28-05, 09:14 PM
#6
DVD Talk Special Edition
Thread Starter
Originally Posted by das Monkey
"One time I was with Diesel in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. Diesel goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm Vin Diesel! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'Viiindeezel' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer!'"
das
das
06-28-05, 09:42 PM
#7
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Vin Diesel taught Pai Mei the five point palm exploding heart technique.
Vin Diesel's semen is the source of all life. That is to say, when he ejaculates, he creates a new galaxy. This is how the 'Milky Way' came to be.
The limit as n approaches infinity of log(n^(6n)) = Vin Diesel, for all real numbers.
Vin Diesel is the ultimate paradox in that he does not think and yet he very much is.
Vin Diesel's semen is the source of all life. That is to say, when he ejaculates, he creates a new galaxy. This is how the 'Milky Way' came to be.
The limit as n approaches infinity of log(n^(6n)) = Vin Diesel, for all real numbers.
Vin Diesel is the ultimate paradox in that he does not think and yet he very much is.
06-28-05, 11:01 PM
#10
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
Some of them are so reandom that they are funny, I haven't seen any of theo nes you guys posted yrt, how many could there be ?
Vin Diesel knows the last digit of pi. He says it's between 0 and 9.
When dating girls of Chinese origin, he serenades them by parking his 83 Toyota Tracel under their window and turning his tricked out system as loud as it will go to the song "I'm in love wit chu" by Da Brat...ironically all his Chinese girls have had the last name Chu.
Never expose Vin Diesel to sunlight. Never get Vin Diesel wet. And never, ever, feed Vin Diesel after midnight.
Vin Diesel has never said "It takes two to tango", because he can tango all by himself.
Vin Diesel invented Irish dancing during the brief period when it was his fetish to staple women's arms to their torsos during sex.
Vin Diesel has never been to Disneyland, but he’s banged most of the dwarves.
Vin Diesel accidentally inspired Socrates to invent the Socratic method by going "Huh?"
Vin Diesel invented N'Sync as punishment for parents who can't discipline their preteen daughters.
When Vin Diesel eats a pack of Starbursts, all of them are pink.
When asked about working with Vin Diesel on Boiler Room, Giovanni Ribisi simply stated, "His breath tasted like duck fart."
Vin Diesel eats gunpowder and shits bullets.
Vin Diesel invented pesticide. Before that, humans had to convince bugs to commit suicide
Vin Diesel knows the last digit of pi. He says it's between 0 and 9.
When dating girls of Chinese origin, he serenades them by parking his 83 Toyota Tracel under their window and turning his tricked out system as loud as it will go to the song "I'm in love wit chu" by Da Brat...ironically all his Chinese girls have had the last name Chu.
Never expose Vin Diesel to sunlight. Never get Vin Diesel wet. And never, ever, feed Vin Diesel after midnight.
Vin Diesel has never said "It takes two to tango", because he can tango all by himself.
Vin Diesel invented Irish dancing during the brief period when it was his fetish to staple women's arms to their torsos during sex.
Vin Diesel has never been to Disneyland, but he’s banged most of the dwarves.
Vin Diesel accidentally inspired Socrates to invent the Socratic method by going "Huh?"
Vin Diesel invented N'Sync as punishment for parents who can't discipline their preteen daughters.
When Vin Diesel eats a pack of Starbursts, all of them are pink.
When asked about working with Vin Diesel on Boiler Room, Giovanni Ribisi simply stated, "His breath tasted like duck fart."
Vin Diesel eats gunpowder and shits bullets.
Vin Diesel invented pesticide. Before that, humans had to convince bugs to commit suicide
06-28-05, 11:03 PM
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"Vin Diesel is actually five men, all of whom share the same soul. If any one of them ever comes face to face with another, they are required by the laws of fate to totally rock the fuck out. The last time this cosmic event occurred, Atlantis sank beneath the sea forever. It was worth it."
06-28-05, 11:12 PM
#12
DVD Talk Ultimate Edition
Originally Posted by kicker_of_elves
"Vin Diesel is actually five men, all of whom share the same soul. If any one of them ever comes face to face with another, they are required by the laws of fate to totally rock the fuck out. The last time this cosmic event occurred, Atlantis sank beneath the sea forever. It was worth it."
I can't stop myself from reading them
here's some more...
I once saw Vin Diesel stare at a mailbox and turn it into a small Philipino boy. Needless to say, he swallowed the child.
9 out of 10 scientists agree, the power of Vin Diesel's urine should be harnessed to replace fossil fuels. The tenth scientist was high-fived by Vin Diesel, causing fragments of his arm to accidentally press the "no" button.
Vin Diesel is deathly allergic to peanuts, but he eats them anyway.
Vin Diesel invented fear just so he could scare the shit out of people.
Last edited by ivelostr2; 06-28-05 at 11:26 PM.
06-29-05, 01:49 AM
#15
DVD Talk Legend
Originally Posted by Squirrel God
Vin Diesel is the ultimate paradox in that he does not think and yet he very much is.
That one's great.
06-29-05, 02:53 AM
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06-29-05, 04:47 AM
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Vin Diesel was listening to the Shins before Zach Braff ever heard of them.
Vin Diesel single-handedly accounts for over half of all the processing power the SETI@home project accumulates. He does all this without a computer, instead using the Casio VL-Tone keyboard to do all the computations manually.
Vin Diesel can predict the shuffle on his iPod.
Vin Diesel's penis has eight different functions, as opposed to a Swiss Army knife, which only has six, AND lacks a mini satellite dish.
Vin has invented a new version of paper, rock, scissors where you can also decide to be Vin himself. He has never taught anyone the hand sign for Vin because so far he has never met anyone worthy enough to use it.
There is an underused feature on the batman utility belt. A button that calls Vin Diesel.
Vin Diesel touches himself at night.
Vin Diesel can whistle through his anus.
I must stop! Just how many facts are in this database?
Vin Diesel single-handedly accounts for over half of all the processing power the SETI@home project accumulates. He does all this without a computer, instead using the Casio VL-Tone keyboard to do all the computations manually.
Vin Diesel can predict the shuffle on his iPod.
Vin Diesel's penis has eight different functions, as opposed to a Swiss Army knife, which only has six, AND lacks a mini satellite dish.
Vin has invented a new version of paper, rock, scissors where you can also decide to be Vin himself. He has never taught anyone the hand sign for Vin because so far he has never met anyone worthy enough to use it.
There is an underused feature on the batman utility belt. A button that calls Vin Diesel.
Vin Diesel touches himself at night.
Vin Diesel can whistle through his anus.
I must stop! Just how many facts are in this database?
06-29-05, 10:14 AM
#19
DVD Talk Limited Edition
Much thanks to Big Dave for this link. I was having a bad day until I read this thread, now I can't remember what the hell was bothering me.
Much like how the seismograph detects earthquakes, prominent scientists have tried to create a diesemograph to determine how amazing Vin Diesel is. Each one has broken, beause it doesn't go high enough.
Much like how the seismograph detects earthquakes, prominent scientists have tried to create a diesemograph to determine how amazing Vin Diesel is. Each one has broken, beause it doesn't go high enough.
06-29-05, 10:36 AM
#21
DVD Talk Limited Edition
Before you obey your thirst, you better obey Vin Diesel.
Vin Diesel writes fanfic Sesame Street episodes in his mother's basement
The limit as x approaches infinity of e^x is Vin Diesel. Ironicially, the limit as x approaches Vin Diesel of e^x is David Hasselhoff.
Vin Diesel does not hear the ocean when he puts a seashell to his ear, he hears "It's Rain Raining Men" by the Weather Girls.
In a recent press conference, Vin Diesel confirmed rumors that he was going to allow Arnold Schwarzenegger to enter his urethra so that he could be reborn at a later date and be eligible for the United States presidency.
Vin Diesel writes fanfic Sesame Street episodes in his mother's basement
The limit as x approaches infinity of e^x is Vin Diesel. Ironicially, the limit as x approaches Vin Diesel of e^x is David Hasselhoff.
Vin Diesel does not hear the ocean when he puts a seashell to his ear, he hears "It's Rain Raining Men" by the Weather Girls.
In a recent press conference, Vin Diesel confirmed rumors that he was going to allow Arnold Schwarzenegger to enter his urethra so that he could be reborn at a later date and be eligible for the United States presidency.
Last edited by jdpatri; 06-29-05 at 10:44 AM.
06-29-05, 10:37 AM
#22
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Vin Diesel supports stem cell research, but only as a byproduct of his support for killing babies.
Vin Diesel believed himself to be cursed with the same fate as the infamous Oedipus. He then decided to kill his mother and rape his father, just to show fate what's what.
The Shroud of Turin is actually the remains of the arena that Jesus indian-wrestled Vin Diesel in. The imprint is the result of Vin Diesel's 'Flamboyant Piledriver' move.
Vin Diesel has had sex with two of the three Powerpuff Girls.
It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
Every time Vin Diesel kills god, a kitten masturbates.
Vin Diesel believed himself to be cursed with the same fate as the infamous Oedipus. He then decided to kill his mother and rape his father, just to show fate what's what.
The Shroud of Turin is actually the remains of the arena that Jesus indian-wrestled Vin Diesel in. The imprint is the result of Vin Diesel's 'Flamboyant Piledriver' move.
Vin Diesel has had sex with two of the three Powerpuff Girls.
It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
Every time Vin Diesel kills god, a kitten masturbates.
06-29-05, 10:58 AM
#23
DVD Talk Legend
Originally Posted by kicker_of_elves
"Vin Diesel is actually five men, all of whom share the same soul. If any one of them ever comes face to face with another, they are required by the laws of fate to totally rock the fuck out. The last time this cosmic event occurred, Atlantis sank beneath the sea forever. It was worth it."
It's so true!
06-29-05, 11:19 AM
#24
DVD Talk Legend
While digging the Grand Canyon, Vin Diesel ran into Godzilla, and beat him up so badly that he's never dared assail the West Coast ever since, and attacks Japan, instead.
06-29-05, 11:49 AM
#25
DVD Talk Limited Edition
Vin Diesel had sex with a cardboard box on a bet. The box got pregnant and later had a child. That child was Kevin Eubanks.
I don't know why I think this one is so damn funny. I think I should be ashamed.
I don't know why I think this one is so damn funny. I think I should be ashamed.