Patman

Welcome to hour 5 of the Jack Bauer Power Hour.

LorenzoL

Thanks for the reminder.

movieking

24 on Monday is throwing me off as well.

Bandoman

I heard a preview on the radio this morning with Jack yelling "YOU DON'T HAVE TIME!"

das Monkey

The move to Monday is all part of their evil plan. On a night like Tuesday, I'd probably be able to find the strength to stop watching, but on Mondays without football, and therefore no primary objective, I find my willpower to be lacking.

das

Merkin Muffley

Jack Bauer needs his own Magic 8 Ball. Anytime you get into a jam, shake it up for a solution your problem.

You: "I'm OUT OF TIME! What should I do?!?!?"

8 Ball:
• Shove a towel down their throat!
• Use a hacksaw!
• Get addicted to heroin!
• Start a prison riot!
• Shoot your boss!
• Grab an axe!
• Rob the Quickie Mart!
•

Trelach24

Billy Batts

Would I be totally lost if I tried to pick up 24 tonight? I'm so pissed at myself for missing the beginning episodes.

Quake1028

!

das Monkey

No. It's highly unlikely this plotline will even be relevant 3 hours from now anyway.

Here's a quick rundown:

Jack: This is the happiest I've ever been. I'm so in love with you. This can't possibly be foreshadowing.
Audrey: Remember me? I was in that stupid pilot for Soulmates that Television Preview scams people with.
Jack: Oh yeah. Well, I have to get to CTU
Driscoll: Hey. I'm the new incompetent boss character.
Jack: WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?
Driscoll: Dude ... not yet.
Jack: THERE ISN'T TIME!
Driscoll: Dude. Chill. The new season's just starting. There's plenty of time. Now, I have a major emergency that you have valuable information about, but I will ignore you, otherwise the formula wouldn't work.
Dina: Back off, bitch. I'm this season's uber Evil character. I've been practicing my "evil stare" all month.
Driscoll's Stooge: Hey there, chap. How's about you kindly tell us your evil plan?
Gratuitous Suspect: I'll neeeeever teee-eell.
*GUNFIRE*
Jack: WHAT IS YOUR PRIMARY OBJECTIVE!?!
Gratuitous Suspect: William Devane ... it's William Devane!!
Ancillary CTU Agent: The guy from Dynasty?
Jack: IT'S KNOTS LANDING!!! Damn, you people can't get anything right!
*EXPLOSION*
Dina: Heeedddooo ... still evil over here. Pay more attention to me.
Navi: Hey, now. We're both evil ... together. *hugs* Oh, and our Americanized son who won't possibly turn on us.
Chloe: See what I did there? I used to be just annoying. Now I'm likeably annoying.
Sarah: Why's it so dark in here? It wasn't like this on Boomtown.
Taylor: OK, I'm here. Now I'm supposed to create needless tension and stir up trouble, right?
Jack: Everybody be cool, this is a robbery! Chloe, rotate the sat signal!
Chloe: Edgar, open up a socket!
Edgar: Chloe, I need a pipe into archives.
Driscoll: Sarah, spy on Chloe, and send it to my console and my PDA.
Chloe: Why don't you stick a pipe in your socket!!
Taylor: Edgar, spy on everyone.
Jack: Where's my blah blah blah?
Chloe: Just a min...
Jack: THERE ISN'T TIME!!!
Dina: I'm your mudder. Kill the white chick.
Behrooz: I will not remember this and it will not be relevant later in the show.
Driscoll: Jack's the only one here who isn't completely incompetent. Stop him!!!
*TICK* *TICK* *TICK*

das

Bandoman

Sadly, that's a completely accurate summary.

Ranger

That's great, das monkey.

I wonder what will happen to that Richard fellow? Does he know something and not telling CTU?

Jackskeleton

What Is Your Primary Objective!!!!

firteen88

check out this link.......

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...en_tv_eo/15718

Patman

Actually the 9 p.m. Monday timeslot is murder for me now:

24
Las Vegas
Everwood
Two and a Half Men
The Bachelorette (hey, Jen's cute).

das Monkey

Dear Rabiah Ahmed,

24 also makes white people look like incompetent, sneaky, backstabbing fools and black women evil, conniving bitches. Oh, and South Americans are all druglords. And Europeans are all rich investors in terrorism. And blondes are stupid. Get over it ... it's a TV show. The great thing about 24 is that anyone can be a terrorist -- suburban housewife, three-year-old baby, cougar, they don't care. It's an equal opportunity terror-wielding funhouse. If anything, they should be happy. At least the terrorist seem to have some common sense in this show. It's the United States government who should be yelling about being portrayed negatively.

das

Rogue588

Yeah, I posted a counterpoint from last week's New York Post HERE.

Caliking

das!!! that was great. completely accurate rundown of this show.

however, its the only show i have ever been excited to watch and i am completely addicted. its so damned fun! jack is like heroin!

dstrauss

LOL. I can just see him yelling the next line too.... "Any of you f***ing pricks move, and I'll execute every m*****f****** last one of you!"

(Language sanitized for the Pulp Fiction impaired.)

Shagrath

I thought it was on at 8 pm this season, and now it's on at 9pm. That's when I have to be at work.. Grrr! I even told my boss last week that I'd probably be about 10 minutes late every Monday due to 24, and he said it was fine.. I can't be 70 minutes late though, or my ass will be looking for a new job. Damn you, Fox!

Geofferson

That's great das. Too bad it's too long for a sig though.

mjduda

Any body have the first 4 episodes on tape? I would like to buy them. [email protected]

The Cow

Edgar: Just because you overheard a conversation with me and Chloe, doesn't make me your bitch!

Edgar rocks!

uscjd2004

I missed the first 20 minutes of 24 tonight. Would someone please give me a rundown (with as many details as feasible) of what happened? Thanks in advance.

j123vt_99

Is the President the father from Unhappily Ever After?