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View Full Version : You Just Might Have a DVD Problem if ...


Dana
02-25-04, 07:12 PM
Your six-year-old tells you that he/she prefers the full screen format to anamorphic widescreen format and you send her to bed.

Your wife begged you (unsuccessfully) to see Moulin Rouge but you counted the days to the DVD release.

You feel the need to lie to even anonymous people on the Internet - downgrading the number of DVDs you really own.

You look forward to seeing the movie (the second time) on DVD more than seeing it the first time at the movies.

You bought a movie that you didn't really like simply because you heard it had great bonus features.

You started a thread on the Internet asking for when Fellowship Of The Rings is coming out on DVD and the movie wasn't even out yet.

You are thinking about living on pet food just so you can purchase a region-free DVD player.

You bought Eisenstein - The Sound Years and you don't even know what The Sound Years are let alone who the heck Eisenstein was.

You swing the conversation over to when the uncut edition of the Boondock Saints will be available in Region 1 with the additional two minutes like it is in Japan .. at your son's hockey game.

You bought the special edition, collector's edition, the ultimate edition (rated) and the ultimate edition (unrated) of American Pie and you didn't even like the movie.

You purchased a used version of The 400 Blows for $400 on Ebay "just to fill out your Criterion Collection" when a perfectly good version by another distributor is available for $25 new, well you just might now understand what 400 Blows really means.

You wanted to deck some guy on the Internet for his opinion of snap cases versus keep cases.

You bought two copies of The Beyond just because at $14.99 the special edition tin seemed like such a deal.

You bought a round of drinks to celebrate the news that Willy Wonka would be coming out in widescreen after all.

You stay up late searching the latest DVD, pressing up, down, left, and right searching for 'hidden' Easter eggs.

You enthusiastically responded to the question: your favorite five DVD menus.

You're posted so much on DVDTalk that you've been given the status "DVD Talk Evangelist".

You have trouble sleeping on Monday nights because you're so excited about the next day's releases.

You have the time to come up with 17 reasons why you have a DVD problem.

Your six-year-old knows what anamorphic widescreen format is.

You're ever agonized over how to organize or display your DVDs.

You know exactly when your favorite unreleased DVD is coming out, but forget your the date of your anniversary.

You buy Johnny Nuemonic on SuperBit collection, even though you know the movie SUCKED, just to have it on SuperBit.

You have stacks, and stacks of DVDs waiting for months to be entered in DVDProfiler or DVDAficionado.

You can randomly list every film being released on DVD for the next six consecutive weeks.

You can remember the exact price you paid, and the deal you got on any particular DVD in your collection.

You hide the credit card bills for all the DVD purchases the previous month.

You rush home to get to the mailbox first, or happen to work nights and set your alarm to get up in the middle of the day to get the mail before your wife/girlfriend/significant other can see what you've ordered.

You have a conversation with a fellow DVD collector on a break at work talking about special features, ultimate editions, the deal you got on a DVD etc ... and your co-workers look at you like you are some kind of super freak from outer space.

You are on your computer, and check back & refresh DVD Talk more than six times an hour.

You started collecting DVDs a year after your friend turned you on to them, and have since surpassed their total collection, and you enjoy great pleasure in this fact.

You work the night shift at the Post Office, and call your friend "tool" and "stick" all night, and your names are Jason and Shane.

You have several hundred DVD movies in your collection and still can't find something you want to watch.

You can extrapolate every date's day of the week for the next 6 months by using Tuesdays as a guide (ie "March 16 is a release date so March 18 must fall on a Thursday".

You start your day with a cup of Java and the DVD Talk Bargains section so you don't miss any misprices.

You walk around with your eyes squinted so that the world appears to be in widescreen format.

You spend so much money on DVDs that your wife puts you on a monthly budget on November 15, and by January 9 you've already spent your budget through May 15.

Your 7 year old wants to watch a movie, the first thing they do at the menu is going into setup and see if it has either 5.1 or DTS. (Thanks to Star Wars Guy)

Your collection is cited as one of the reasons for your divorce. (Thanks to hiphopkid)

You find yourself being interviewed by the NY Times concerning DVDs and collecting. (Thanks to gutwrencher)

You get a Post Office box that you don't tell your wife about! (Thanks to divemaster)

You're on a first name basis with the majority of the postal staff because you get so many packages. (Thanks to nemein)

You took out a second mortgage when Deep Discount had their 20 percent discount sale. (Thanks to Sex Fiend)

You tears of joy at reading the announcement of the Star Wars Trilogy box set turned to wails of sorrow upon learning that it was the SE version of the films. (Thanks to Sex Fiend)

You got in a fistfight at Best Buy over the single copy of the recalled Ed Wood DVD on the shelf. (Thanks to Sex Fiend)

You think of your paycheck in terms of how many DVDs you can buy. (Thanks to pat00139)

You like to make fun of Joe Sixpack's DVD viewing habits but you spend countless hours on a DVD forum whining about cover art, the lack of inserts, and a 1/4 of a sec. crotch shot missing from a cartoon character. (Thanks to eXcentris)

You sneak newly bought DVDs into the house and put them on the rack hoping they will blend in and your wife doesn't notice the 25 you've bought in the past month. (Thanks to freudguy)

You buy Star Trek Voyager for $100.00 you might have a problem. (Thanks to jessebo)

Your dvd tracking list contains 893 titles...but really, you only have 52. (Thanks to gutwrencher)

Your 20 month old says the dvd cover stinks make new. And you agree and you do. (Thanks to Randy810)

Your main concern on vacation is the shipping time to Netflix and don't know where the nearest post office is in this town. (Thanks to bdots48)

You spend an ungodly amount of time reorganizing your collection to alphabetize it and a month later you've received enough DVDs that you need to do it again. (Thanks to DVDude!)

You and your significant other keep your DVDs separate because you don't want "chick flick" titles like Dirty Dancing in your collection and she doesn't want gore titles like The Dead Next Door in hers. (Thanks to DVDude!)

You and your significant other argue over who will be the one to buy a new release so it can be in their collection. (Thanks to DVDude!)

You spend too much on building up your Criterions and forget that Valentine's Day is soon and you're broke! (Thanks to drjay)

You remodel your home to accomodate more shelf space, knowing that those shelves too will soon be full. (Thanks to nightmaster)

Spine numbers are more important in your life than women. (Thanks to RyoHazuki)

You check the master list to see your contribution added for posterity's sake, and realize the credit was given to someone else. (Thanks to divemaster)

You have an anxiety attack when your wife goes for the mail. (Thanks to ChrisHicks)

You anxiously look for titles you 'need' in December so you can surpass the number of DVDs you bought LAST year. (Thanks to nightmaster)

You tell your friends no, you are NOT a free rental store. (Thanks to nightmaster)

You refer to your collection as 'The Precious'. (Thanks to nightmaster)

You read this list and nod your head a lot.

C-Mart
02-25-04, 07:20 PM
Originally posted by Dana
You have several hundred DVD movies in your collection and still can't find something you want to watch.


Just about every night! Great post Dana!

Star Wars Guy
02-25-04, 07:22 PM
Add this one...it just happened as I was reading the post:

When your 7 year old wants to watch a movie, the first thing they do at the menu is going into setup and see if it has either 5.1 or DTS.

RevKarl
02-25-04, 07:59 PM
Originally posted by Dana
...You read this list and nod your head a lot. Hell, I think I developed whiplash!!!

hiphopkid
02-25-04, 08:24 PM
...if your collection is cited as one of the reasons for your divorce.

gutwrencher
02-25-04, 08:27 PM
...or if you find yourself being interviewed by the NY Times concerning dvds and collecting...like me!-eek-

nemein
02-25-04, 08:33 PM
:cool: Most of these don't apply to me... I guess I can go on living in denial :D

Cornelius1047
02-25-04, 08:36 PM
Hi. My name is Khalid and I have a problem.

K

Andalusia
02-25-04, 08:39 PM
Originally posted by hiphopkid
...if your collection is cited as one of the reasons for your divorce.

:lol: I remember that thread.

divemaster
02-25-04, 08:41 PM
You rush home to get to the mailbox first, or happen to work nights and set your alarm to get up in the middle of the day to get the mail before your wife/girlfriend/significant other can see what you've ordered.
Or, you get a Post Office box that you don't tell your wife about!

nemein
02-25-04, 08:45 PM
Or, you get a Post Office box that you don't tell your wife about!



Better yet [based on a true story ;)]... you're on a first name basis w/ the majority of the postal staff because you get so many packages :D

BlackBeauty92
02-25-04, 09:09 PM
Originally posted by Dana
You have the time to come up with 17 reasons why you have a DVD problem.

You know exactly when your favorite unreleased DVD is coming out, but forget your the date of your anniversary.

You can remember the exact price you paid, and the deal you got on any particular DVD in your collection.

You are on your computer, and check back & refresh DVD Talk more than six times an hour.

You have several hundred DVD movies in your collection and still can't find something you want to watch.

You can extrapolate every date's day of the week for the next 6 months by using Tuesdays as a guide (ie "March 19 is a release date so March 21 must fall on a Thursday".

You start your day with a cup of Java and the DVD Talk Bargains section so you don't miss any misprices.

You walk around with your eyes squinted so that the world appears to be in widescreen format.

You read this list and nod your head a lot.

:lol:


oh, wait...



:(

BlackBeauty92
02-25-04, 09:11 PM
<--- asian, so everything looks widescreen for me

:D

Sex Fiend
02-25-04, 09:23 PM
Heh, heh...good stuff, Dana !

I would add:

- You took out a second mortgage when Deep Discount had their 20 percent discount sale.

- You tears of joy at reading the announcement of the Star Wars Trilogy box set turned to wails of sorrow upon learning that it was the SE version of the films.

- You got in a fistfight at Best Buy over the single copy of the recalled Ed Wood DVD on the shelf.

LasVegasMichael
02-25-04, 09:37 PM
Okay, thank's for the pick-me-up!

More of those are true and apply to me then I care to mention or even think about!

etrnlevol
02-25-04, 09:43 PM
rotfl
okay so I'm easily amused

Axorr
02-25-04, 10:01 PM
Yes! Glad to know I'm not alone!

Bill Geiger
02-26-04, 03:43 AM
Originally posted by BlackBeauty92
<--- asian, so everything looks widescreen for me

:D

Now that is funny!

lisadoris
02-26-04, 08:03 AM
I swear there's a twelve-step program in all of our futures!

n0fear88
02-26-04, 08:11 AM
DVD therapy :) :lol:

steebo777
02-26-04, 08:25 AM
Originally posted by n0fear88
DVD therapy :) :lol:
Do you know of such a thing? I may need to be checked in. I went to see a preview of Club Dread last night, and as I was walking I found a $20 bill on the ground. I grabbed it and smiled profusily during the entire movie thinking about which DVD I was going to buy. Yeah I know it's wrong, but it was better than watching Club Dread.

REL77
02-26-04, 08:43 AM
my neck now hurts from nodding so much, wow! I have a Problem

garolo
02-26-04, 09:09 AM
Dana, you've done Jeff Foxworthy proud. If my wife read your post she would think you're talking about me.

pat00139
02-26-04, 09:57 AM
Yeah... good times...

"You have stacks, and stacks of DVDs waiting for months to be entered in DVDProfiler."
Okay, so not DVDProfiler, but I'm a 2 hundred or so back on DVDAficionado... :D (Hey, they have VERY few R3s, okay?)

How about this one:

You think of your paycheck in terms of how many DVDs you can buy.

(Not so anymore but before I had a real job, you betcha I did that!)

Kumar J
02-26-04, 07:27 PM
You started collectin DVDs a year after your friend turned you on to them, and have since surpassed their total collection, and you enjoy great pleasure in this fact.

This is something that I must really nod to

eXcentris
02-26-04, 07:56 PM
You like to make fun of Joe Sixpack's DVD viewing habits but you spend countless hours on a DVD forum whining about cover art, the lack of inserts, and a 1/4 of a sec. crotch shot missing from a cartoon character. :)

freudguy
02-26-04, 08:40 PM
....you sneak newly bought DVD's into the house and put them on the rack hoping they will blend in & your wife doesn't notice the 25 you've bought in the past month.

jessebo
02-26-04, 10:29 PM
you forgot one.. if you buy star trek voyager for $100.00 you might have a problem.

EskimoJoe
02-26-04, 10:39 PM
Originally posted by steebo777
Do you know of such a thing? I may need to be checked in. I went to see a preview of Club Dread last night, and as I was walking I found a $20 bill on the ground. I grabbed it and smiled profusily during the entire movie thinking about which DVD I was going to buy. Yeah I know it's wrong, but it was better than watching Club Dread.

Although this is off-topic, I agree that I would think about the movie I would buy, but Club Dread was amazing (I also saw a sneak preview here on campus).

RyoHazuki
02-26-04, 10:45 PM
If spine numbers are more important in your life than women.

jasonnaper
02-26-04, 11:06 PM
Great stuff!

strife
02-26-04, 11:16 PM
Originally posted by jessebo
you forgot one.. if you buy star trek voyager for $100.00 you might have a problem.

:lol:

gutwrencher
02-27-04, 01:10 AM
Originally posted by eXcentris
You like to make fun of Joe Sixpack's DVD viewing habits but you spend countless hours on a DVD forum whining about cover art, the lack of inserts, and a 1/4 of a sec. crotch shot missing from a cartoon character. :)

rotfl

gutwrencher
02-27-04, 01:13 AM
or....your dvd tracking list contains 893 titles...but really, you only have 52. ok, maybe not a dvd problem...but a problem.http://www.stopstart.freeserve.co.uk/smilie/gojerry.gif

Randy810
02-27-04, 01:17 AM
You have a problem if your 20 month old says the dvd cover stinks make new. And you agree and you do.

Randy810
02-27-04, 01:19 AM
jessebo

I love the metallic orangy pink case however.

bodomnet
02-27-04, 10:04 AM
lol, I guess I have a problem. "and your names are Jason and Shane." lol my name is Shane, and a good freind and dvd lover is Jason.. random note there.

DVDho78DTS
02-27-04, 10:25 AM
Originally posted by Dana
You are on your computer, and check back & refresh DVD Talk more than six times an hour.

This is probably the only one that might apply to me.

I talk to a guy at work about DVDs but only when he brings them up. I despise talking with him about DVD though since he HATES widescreen, wants to record DVD to VHS, and only likes movies if they contain lots of action.

Guess I'm not hardcore like most here.

Michael Corvin
02-27-04, 10:52 AM
Originally posted by freudguy
....you sneak newly bought DVD's into the house and put them on the rack hoping they will blend in & your wife doesn't notice the 25 you've bought in the past month.

a ton in the original post apply, but this one is the best. :up:

bdots48
02-27-04, 01:03 PM
...you're main concern on vacation is the shipping time to Netflix. I've got 3 netflix rentals and don't know where the nearest post office is in this town...

DVDude!
02-27-04, 01:42 PM
Great list. I'm guilty of more than a few. Here are some others that apply to me--and hopefully some of you so I don't feel so pathetic. :)


You spend an ungodly amount of time reorganizing your collection to alphabetize it and a month later you've received enough DVDs that you need to do it again.
You and your significant other keep your DVDs separate because you don't want "chick flick" titles like Dirty Dancing in your collection and she doesn't want gore titles like The Dead Next Door in hers.
You and your significant other argue over who will be the one to buy a new release so it can be in their collection.

jough
02-28-04, 01:22 AM
You can extrapolate every date's day of the week for the next 6 months by using Tuesdays as a guide (ie "March 19 is a release date so March 21 must fall on a Thursday".

Oh god, I do this all the time. "Well, April 20th is a Tuesday, so the 21st must be Wednesday."

"How the hell do you know that April 20th is a Tuesday?"

"Um, because the 'Master and Commander' special edition comes out that day."

Hey, Dana, do you mind if I adopt this list for Cinema-Review.com? I'll give you credit, of course.

Dana
02-28-04, 03:12 PM
Glad everyone enjoyed this thread. I edited my post to include everyone's additions. Thanks.

Libby
02-28-04, 04:45 PM
That was a great post, A lot of those things are very true for a lot of people. Its scary soon there going to need D.A.A. DVD ADDICTIONS ANONMOUS (or however you spell it)

jessebo
02-28-04, 06:54 PM
Originally posted by Randy810
jessebo

I love the metallic orangy pink case however.

I can't disagree with that, I like the cases too, but I just can't bring myself to buy these sets... too much cash for what you get, but that's another thread entirely...

divemaster
02-28-04, 10:07 PM
Originally posted by Dana
Glad everyone enjoyed this thread. I edited my post to include everyone's additions. Thanks.
...you check the master list to see your contribution added for posterity's sake, and realize the credit was given to someone else...

:p

freudguy
02-28-04, 11:29 PM
Sigh, I guess mine wasn't good enough for the list :(

;)

RyoHazuki
02-28-04, 11:59 PM
Nor was mine.

drjay
02-29-04, 12:00 AM
How bout when you spend too much on building up your Criterions and forget that Valentine's Day is soon and you're broke! Damn the OOP CCs!!

nightmaster
02-29-04, 12:27 AM
You remodel your home to accomodate more shelf space, knowing that those shelves too will soon be full. That would be moi.

FiveO
02-29-04, 01:32 AM
Originally posted by freudguy
....you sneak newly bought DVD's into the house and put them on the rack hoping they will blend in & your wife doesn't notice the 25 you've bought in the past month.


rotfl

been there...done that.

ivelostr2
02-29-04, 01:52 AM
Originally posted by freudguy
Sigh, I guess mine wasn't good enough for the list :(

;)

this is actually the most true for me freudguy...

ChrisHicks
02-29-04, 10:31 AM
you might just have a DVD problem if you have an anxiety attack when your wife goes for the mail.

Dana
02-29-04, 01:15 PM
I've edited the list again. Thanks for the contributions. Sorry I missed freudguy and RyoHazuki, and gave the wrong credit for a contribution from divemaster.

BTW, this thread appeared on DVDTalk a couple of years ago. I had saved the complete list back then and recently decided to resurrect it to see what kind of response there would be. So far it's been great.

Have fun.

jough
02-29-04, 01:47 PM
You're all famous:

http://cinema-review.com/dvd/000019/index.php

nightmaster
03-01-04, 06:23 PM
You anxiously look for titles you 'need' in December so you can surpass the number of DVDs you bought LAST year.

You tell your friends no, you are NOT a free rental store.

You refer to your collection as 'The Precious'.

metaridley
03-02-04, 07:01 PM
This list is so TRUE!!